Azerbaijanis and Russian girls. Russian girls

18/07/12
I hate it - it's too much. Most likely, I don’t approve. Azerbaijanis extremely rarely take Russian girls as wives (they are Muslims and their parents often do not approve of such unions, and they will not go against the will of their parents). Often they just meet a Russian girl, sleep with them, and then break up. And they probably found their future wife when they were children. Well, I don’t like the fact that if they marry a Russian girl, they drag her into their religion. And not vice versa. Where have you seen an Azerbaijani change his religion? But I know quite a lot of Russian girls who changed their religion for the sake of their (future) husband.

PrincessAnna, 18/07/12
As a normal Slavic girl, I have a dislike for these southern peoples in my blood. It would be hard to call an Azerbaijani handsome in real life. Personally, the Scandinavians are closer to me. And as for Russians marrying Azeris... Such a woman ceases to be Russian. We have a completely different mentality, a different culture and religion. If this is not in the soul, then such a woman does not have a homeland.

ioomooe, 18/07/12
Muddy stream of consciousness. And other Muslims or even Armenians very often take Russian girls as wives (?) and do not involve their wives in their religions? And then, what is the reason for not being approved? In girls changing religion?

ioomooe, 18/07/12
Marianna, not all is well that begins well. The scenario could be like this: getting married - moving to Azerbaijan - having a child every year - the role of a house slave - an environment that speaks an incomprehensible language - nausea from one’s own and others’ hospitality - the husband lives in Russia, doing something unknown and with whom - one wants to leave home, and nothing - finally, a divorce, and here it is happiness with three children in my arms.

ioomooe, 18/07/12
Princess Anna, for real Scandinavians you are a creature from the south of the penultimate class, just as for you the southern peoples are.

FollowYou, 18/07/12
PrincessAnna, I support you! I don’t understand Russian women who accept Islam.

Moscow Azerbaijani, 19/07/12
Princess Anna! These Vikings surrendered to you. They are boring and stingy. It’s better to marry an Azik - you won’t get bored with us) For example, for me - a handsome Moscow guy) But seriously, such relationships rarely end in something good for Russian girls. We have to be realistic. More often than not, they are left with nothing. For example, due to the fact that az. relatives are against it or the guy just decided to take a walk and in fact he is married. So, girls, try to avoid relationships with Azerbaijanis (especially those who live in Azerbaijan, and not in Russia), and if you do, then be vigilant, and most importantly (!) - do not rush into bed. Have respect for yourself! Az and Russian mentalities are very different, even though we all lived for 70 years in the Soviet Union. At first it can be interesting to touch something new, but over time serious misunderstandings can begin due to mentalities.

Neadmin, 19/04/14
I don't approve, but for a completely different reason. What kind of Islam are you talking about here? Azerbaijanis are unpretentious cultural opportunists; the Russian wife of an Azerbaijani, as a rule, NEVER accepts her husband’s culture (I’m talking exclusively about Russians from the Russian Federation), not to mention his faith (even Russian girls from Baku who marry Azerbaijanis do not do this), and the husband does not require this from her. Azerbaijanis are not Arabs or Turks. She will most likely be able to instill Russian culture in him through cooking and bedtime and limit his contacts with his relatives. Their children almost always have Russian names, are baptized, and sympathize with Russian culture more than with Azerbaijani culture (which they don’t understand at all). Then they grow up and, as a rule, do not create families with Azerbaijanis. And they don’t speak the language; What can I say, the Azerbaijani husband himself, after 20 years of living in the Russian Federation with his Russian wife, forgets his language. Someone here wrote that a Russian in such a marriage is not Russian, but in reality it’s the other way around: he is not an Azerbaijani.

There was a time when the Azerbaijani lands were in the possession of the Ottoman and then the Russian Empire, and if we delve into the details, we can remember that we have Albanian and other roots. If you intend to date an Azerbaijani man, then I would like to point out a few nuances that you can expect from them. But please note that everything I wrote is a generalized opinion and may not apply to everyone. Let's start. There will always be another woman between you! Please don't be nervous after reading this title. By another woman I meant his mother. You must be willing to share your love with his mother. Remember one thing, his mother is always right. His mother never lies, takes advantage of his opportunities, or intrigues. All the bad qualities and actions are inherent only in you, of course, all the good is inherent in his mother. In any case, each of us loves our parents, but the Azerbaijani son loves a little more. Azerbaijani men are complacent! I'm not saying they're smug, they're just very confident. An Azerbaijani man is always happy with the work he has done, and even if he has not done it very well, he will never allow anyone to talk badly about him. An Azerbaijani man always walks with his head held high and demonstrates his self-confidence by walking proudly with his hands in his trouser pockets. Azerbaijani men are owners and love to rule. When it comes to women, an Azerbaijani man can be possessive. You must live by his rules. If you are looking for a free, open, carefree relationship that would allow you to do whatever you want, then reconsider your desire to date an Azerbaijani man, as he will not agree to these terms. If he gave you his heart and won yours, then you have already become his property. He will not share you with anyone, and sometimes even with his girlfriends. Just understand that this is part of Azerbaijani culture! God help you! He loves beautiful poetry. Beautiful and high-quality things, fashionable clothes, breathtaking perfume, clean shoes, neat hair, a freshly shaved face - all this and much more are very important for an Azerbaijani man. Azerbaijani men are interested in fashion in parallel with women and take serious care of their appearance. In short, you will never see an Azerbaijani man going on a date with a girl wearing a torn shirt or dirty shoes, while in America this is sometimes a normal occurrence. Let us remember, the Azerbaijani man is always right! Even if you are right for the hundredth time and the end of the world has come, there is not a force in the entire galaxy that would prove to the Azerbaijani man that he is wrong! Remember, he is always right (just don’t put pressure on him and keep quiet). Just accept it and trust that he will appreciate it later. If you don't believe me, then read the paragraph above about self-confidence. If necessary, he will pull the moon out of the sky for you. Let me now tell you about the positive qualities of Azerbaijani men, that is, about what you might like. If you're ready to run away after reading all of the above, take a minute and finish reading this first before making your decision. Azerbaijani men are considered the most caring. They know how to make a woman feel the happiest and most beautiful. Believe me, he will love you at least as much as he loves his mother and will take care of you. An Azerbaijani man understands a woman's needs and desires well and has the power to appreciate her highly. And at the end I want to note one of the important points. Azerbaijani men are very handsome and attractive, I think you already understand this.

"They're complacent."

Azerbaijani TV presenter Gunel Musevi, living in the USA, published her opinion about Azerbaijani men in the online magazine “Every Azeri”.

Oxu.Az presents this article to readers:

If you meet a man who looks Mexican, Arab or English, most likely this man is Azerbaijani. In fact, I can’t think of any specific image to describe an Azerbaijani man.

There was a time when the Azerbaijani lands were in the possession of the Ottoman and then the Russian Empire, and if we delve into the details, we can remember that we have Albanian and other roots.

If you intend to date an Azerbaijani man, then I would like to point out a few nuances that you can expect from them. But please note that everything I wrote is a generalized opinion and may not apply to everyone.

Let's start.

There will always be another woman between you!

Please don't be nervous after reading this title. By another woman I meant his mother. You must be willing to share your love with his mother.

Remember one thing, his mother is always right. His mother never lies, takes advantage of his opportunities, or intrigues. All the bad qualities and actions are inherent only in you, of course, all the good is inherent in his mother. In any case, each of us loves our parents, but the Azerbaijani son loves a little more.
Azerbaijani men are complacent!

I'm not saying they're smug, they're just very confident.

An Azerbaijani man is always happy with the work he has done, and even if he has not done it very well, he will never allow anyone to talk badly about him. An Azerbaijani man always walks with his head held high and demonstrates his self-confidence by walking proudly with his hands in his trouser pockets.

Azerbaijani men are owners and love to rule.

When it comes to women, an Azerbaijani man can be possessive. You must live by his rules. If you are looking for a free, open, carefree relationship that would allow you to do whatever you want, then reconsider your desire to date an Azerbaijani man, as he will not agree to these terms.

If he gave you his heart and won yours, then you have already become his property. He will not share you with anyone, and sometimes even with his girlfriends. Just understand that this is part of Azerbaijani culture! God help you!

He loves beautiful poetry.

Beautiful and high-quality things, fashionable clothes, breathtaking perfume, clean shoes, neat hair, a freshly shaved face - all this and much more are very important for an Azerbaijani man. Azerbaijani men are interested in fashion in parallel with women and take serious care of their appearance.

In short, you will never see an Azerbaijani man going on a date with a girl wearing a torn shirt or dirty shoes, while in America this is sometimes a normal occurrence.

Let us remember, the Azerbaijani man is always right!

Even if you are right for the hundredth time and the end of the world has come, there is not a force in the entire galaxy that would prove to the Azerbaijani man that he is wrong! Remember, he is always right (just don’t put pressure on him and keep quiet). Just accept it and trust that he will appreciate it later. If you don't believe me, then read the paragraph above about self-confidence.

If necessary, he will pull the moon out of the sky for you.

Let me now tell you about the positive qualities of Azerbaijani men, that is, about what you might like.

If you're ready to run away after reading all of the above, take a minute and finish reading this first before making your decision.

Azerbaijani men are considered the most caring. They know how to make a woman feel the happiest and most beautiful. Believe me, he will love you at least as much as he loves his mother and will take care of you. An Azerbaijani man understands a woman's needs and desires well and has the power to appreciate her highly.

And at the end I want to note one of the important points. Azerbaijani men are very handsome and attractive, I think you already understand this.

Nowadays, international marriages are the norm. Russian girls often marry foreigners, and marriages with Azerbaijanis are no exception. Why do they prefer foreign grooms? What kind of Azerbaijani men are they? First of all, oriental guys conquer girls with their ability to look after beautifully and give compliments. But is this the only thing that attracts them?

What kind of people they are, Azerbaijani men, will be discussed in the article.

Azerbaijanis: general characteristics of men

Most of them are short - 170-175 centimeters. They have thick black eyebrows and large facial features, but despite this, they lack typical Caucasian facial features. First of all, they have a straight nose and fair skin.

They are always strictly and elegantly dressed and look, at least, stylish and respectable.

They are a calm and orderly people, compared to other Caucasian ethnic groups. Any conflict with them is resolved without shouting or fist fights. But their Caucasian character still manifests itself: during the celebration of national or religious holidays.

These people are long-livers; the average life expectancy of Azerbaijani men is 70-72 years. There is a village in the republic called Talysh, where many residents are over 110 years old.

Characteristic features of appearance

What are Azerbaijani men like in appearance?

As the Soviet anthropologist Valery Alekseev noted:

• Azerbaijanis are darker-eyed than Georgians and Armenians;
• more than half of the representatives of this people have blue-black hair;
• their face is narrow and slightly elongated;
• the nose protrudes very much;
• the hairline is moderately developed (slightly less than that of Georgians).

Attitude towards marriage

It should be remembered that Azerbaijanis are Muslims. In past times, a man, according to Islamic traditions, could have several wives (maximum 4). However, polygamy is now prohibited by law in Azerbaijan. The attitude towards this phenomenon in the country is extremely negative.

Azerbaijanis treat both marriage and family very responsibly. They are strictly guided by the Koran, which states that marriage is part of religion, and the most faithful believers are those who respect and honor their wives.

It should be noted that the Koran does not prohibit marriages between a Muslim and a Russian, but it is considered best if the girl converts to Islam. Such unions are possible only if the consent of relatives is obtained.

Family

What are Azerbaijani men like in marriage? In a family, both husband and wife have their own rights and responsibilities.

Firstly, the man provides financially for the family. Secondly, he is obliged to take care of his wife, her health and mental state, and pay attention to her. Men love a woman to obey them unquestioningly, even in matters such as choosing an outfit.

Previously, women stayed at home and raised children. But over time this tradition disappeared. Modern Azerbaijani women have the opportunity to work.

Pragmatism

Most of them are pragmatists. In society, male losers do not evoke sympathy; on the contrary, they are condemned or even despised. That is why every man strives to achieve success and material well-being. They choose only those areas that can bring benefits. They have no such thing as “work for the soul.”

Men are prone to self-irony and irony, criticism and self-criticism. They have a great sense of humor, can be cunning, and love entertainment and fun. They love beautiful things, comfort and convenience, and also very tasty food.

The character of Azerbaijani men is peace-loving, but quick-tempered if their dignity and honor, interests and feelings of close relatives are offended.

Sociability

As a rule, Azerbaijani men are sociable, love to talk, spend a lot of time with relatives and friends, often receive guests and go on visits. Celebrating holidays, they organize lavish feasts.

Men treat women, elders, and superiors with respect.

Many men love poetry, they themselves know how to speak beautifully, making long and eloquent toasts, and often tell instructive or funny stories. The main role in communication is played by sincerity and empathy. They do not tolerate loneliness and lack of communication well.

"Don't fall flat on your face"

In a circle of friends, everyone is equal; they communicate sincerely and directly. But all the same, the man tries to behave with restraint, never demonstrates emotions, experiences and feelings. As a rule, they behave confidently and with dignity in society, even if things are going very badly for them. This is called "acting like a man."

It is not accepted in society to talk about your failures, complain, or show your weaknesses; they will simply laugh at you.

And public opinion plays a huge role in a man’s life. It is important for him how he looks in the eyes of others, what they say and think about him.

Among young people, this trend is somewhat weakening; young people more freely express their individuality in behavior, clothing, and lifestyle. But for an Azerbaijani of any age, the worst thing is to lose dignity, “to lose face.” For example, you will never see an Azerbaijani lying drunk on the street anywhere. When receiving guests, the owner will put the best on the table, even if it is the last.

Nepotism

The Republic's long stay within the USSR formed among some Azerbaijani men a tolerant attitude towards violations of the law and abuse of official position. They prefer to build relationships based on mutual agreement and family ties. This trait is inherent not only to Azerbaijanis, but also to many other peoples of the former USSR. But it should be noted that an Azerbaijani always keeps his word, since this is a “matter of honor” for him.

Tolerance

Azerbaijani men in most cases are not nationalists. They are not characterized by xenophobia, that is, they treat representatives of other nationalities very well. They are carriers of the Soviet worldview, the only difference is that they do not consider themselves atheists.

But faith and religiosity usually do not take on the character of fanaticism.

Civic dignity

Young people exhibit such traits as national dignity. They react sharply and negatively to any attempts to insult the attributes and symbols of the state. All this is due to the fact that the new generation has grown up in a completely independent state. The conditions of a market economy have formed in young Azerbaijanis such character traits as practicality and efficiency.

Azerbaijani men: what they are like in love and relationships

What attracts women to Azerbaijani men?

They, like all men, love with their eyes. To please such a man, you need to be beautiful and well-groomed. Men love femininity very much. And the more elegant and bright a woman looks, the better. What are Azerbaijani men like in relationships? Men love to indulge women's whims. But you need to be capricious in a beautiful, flirtatious way.

They cannot tolerate waywardness and stubbornness. They are leaders by nature and do not like to be disobeyed. For a man, a woman is the keeper of the family hearth and the mother of his children. That is why they prefer that she sit at home and take care of family affairs: cook delicious meals, do laundry, maintain order, take care of the children, and so on.

In their understanding, the best self-realization of a woman is to be a mother and wife.

On the Internet on thematic forums, many women share opinions on how to behave with Azerbaijani men, what kind of character they are. But the most charismatic opinion is that of TV presenter Musevi Gunel, an Azerbaijani by origin living in the USA. She published her review about Azerbaijani men in the online magazine EveryAzeri. What do they think they are?

• They look like a Mexican, an Englishman and an Arab combined.
• They are very kind, respectful and loving towards their mothers.
• Self-satisfied and confident.
• They always walk with their heads held high and show their confidence.
• Azerbaijani men love to rule and are great owners. You need to live by their rules and always obey, agree with all the conditions.
• They love beautiful poetry.
• They like beautiful things, fashionable clothes, branded perfumes - all this is very important to them. They are sometimes more interested in fashion than women.
• They are ready to make any sacrifice for the sake of their chosen ones.
• They are very caring and will do everything to make a woman feel happy.

Everything changes

Young Azerbaijanis are very different from the men of the middle generation. National identity and pride are striking. They are more aware of themselves as citizens of a separate independent state.

Young people practically do not drink alcohol. Feasts are accompanied by drinking tea with oriental sweets.

Young people follow the latest films, visit the theater, go to concerts, play dominoes or backgammon.

Modern young people are less romantic and dreamy. They are more pragmatic and hardworking. They like to devote their free time from work to sports, self-education, and self-development.

Young people have become more individual. The accelerated pace of life has led to the weakening of social ties and limited communication with relatives and friends. Even middle-aged men have been visiting less lately and spending time with friends.

Instead of a conclusion

The article revealed the characteristic features of Azerbaijani men, what they are like in love, relationships and everyday life. But it should be remembered that each person is individual. One is very thrifty, another is wasteful, the third is a miser, the fourth is thrifty. Everything is very individual, and the character traits of an Azerbaijani man described in the article may be absolutely not characteristic of any particular person. In this case, axioms simply do not exist...

Marriages with Eastern people. Should we be afraid of mixed marriages?

A young Muscovite married an Azerbaijani. Educated, courteous, wealthy.

She married out of mutual love, and initially their family life could only be envied. And then. everything went awry because the wife (and even more so the mother-in-law) refused to adapt to the way of life of a “normal Eastern man”

NO NEED TO BE AFRAID OF THE “ORIENTAL MAN”

“My granddaughter married an Afghan. His mother, however, is Russian, so he has dual citizenship. Now he wants to register in my apartment (my granddaughter lives with me), but I’m afraid - he’s an oriental person, they talk so much about them. ”(M.N. St. Petersburg).

“I married an Arab Muslim from Israel. Everything was more or less normal until we went to visit him. There are 9 brothers and sisters in his family, all of them are married, all of them have their own children. And I, the youngest daughter-in-law, found myself at everyone’s beck and call (that’s the tradition there). Two months seemed to me like twenty years in a madhouse.” (Natasha, Perm).

“I married a Pakistani. And he immediately presented me with an ultimatum: no miniskirts and open dresses, no makeup, not a single glance at men (“a woman should look at the floor”). In general, I found myself under house arrest. ”(Alina K. Moscow).

There's not a lot of such exotic stuff in my inbox. Mostly they complain about compatriots, that is, former compatriots, and now, it seems, also foreigners. The nationalities of the husbands are different, the religion is the same - Islam. And what is sometimes forgiven to “real” foreigners (“that’s how they do it”), they categorically refuse to forgive “our foreigners.” “If he needed a slave wife, he would take her in the neighboring kishlak (aul, village).”

This is usually what happens: nine out of ten marriages are between people of the same nationality and the same religion. But it’s no secret that white-skinned and blond northern women have always enjoyed success with dark-skinned southern and eastern men. Sometimes it ends in marriage. And here it is appropriate to recall the immortal statement of Comrade Sukhov: “The East is a delicate matter.” That is, clearly imagine what surprises you might encounter, so as not to complain and shed bitter tears later.

WHO IS THE MOTHER, AND WHO IS THE MOTHER-IN-LAW

When Marina brought her fiancé Muslim home for the first time and introduced him to her mother, she experienced an ambivalent feeling. Firstly, Muslim was exactly twice as old as his twenty-year-old bride, and therefore only five years younger than his supposed mother-in-law. And secondly, he was a very interesting, intelligent, well-mannered man with a quiet, insinuating voice, almost European manners and, apparently, considerable means. That is, not a son-in-law, but the dream of any mother-in-law.

As a matter of fact, Marina herself would have done without her mother’s blessing: old-fashioned! But Muslim firmly insisted on this, telling the young and frivolous bride:

There will be no happy family without parental blessing. It’s a pity, of course, that neither my father nor yours lived to see this day. But the mother in this case is the head of the family. My mother sent a letter, she agrees. Now I need to ask yours.

Of course, Marina told her mother all this before introducing her to Muslim. And thereby she presented him in the best light: parents today are spoiled by the respectful attitude of their children to the opinions of their elders. Still, there is something subtly attractive in Eastern traditions.

Nina Andreevna and her daughter lived in a small two-room apartment on Profsoyuznaya Street. Muslim offered to exchange it for a bigger and better one - with a substantial surcharge, of course. Money, troubles - that's everything. Only one thing was required from the future mother-in-law: consent to registration

If you think that, having registered in Moscow, Muslim immediately tried to get his mother-in-law out of the house, then you are mistaken. Only three months passed after the wedding when they moved to a beautiful four-room apartment in the center of Moscow. The apartment, however, required renovation, but these were minor things. Muslim promised to make a toy out of the apartment in a year at the latest. In the meantime, there was no time for renovation: Marina was expecting a child.

Of course, Muslim became the official owner of the apartment. According to his firm conviction, a man should not only be the master of the house, but also the master of the house. A woman’s place is in the nursery or in the kitchen. Therefore, Marina had to leave the fourth year of foreign language, and not on academic leave, but completely. “A married woman should not work, it is a disgrace for a man.”

Marina did not argue: she idolized her husband. Gentle, caring, generous. He was able to literally get out of the ground what Marina wanted, if only she had to stutter. True, a difficult pregnancy did not allow her to be particularly capricious. Even the caring care of her husband created only psychological comfort. I had to go to the hospital for conservation. Muslim visited her every day: with flowers, fruits, small gifts.

Nina Andreevna was also crazy about her son-in-law. like from a man. While Marina was bored in the hospital, her mother and husband became lovers. Neither then nor subsequently did Muslim feel guilty:

If I had behaved like our women, nothing would have happened, I swear by Allah! What if I couldn’t find a woman for myself? And here there’s a blonde walking around the house, you know, her robe is short, transparent, her figure is normal. And she flirts with me, makes eyes, smears her lips. I'm a normal man, not a saint or sick - why refuse?

Yes, he just raped me! - Nina Andreevna later stated. - He said: “I’ll stab you if you don’t give it.” If he were to do so, he would be slaughtered like a chicken. And it turns out that it was my fault that I wore a robe at home. Summer, heat - what else to wear? In a burqa? Or in what's her name, the veil? So, thank God, we are not in Iran.

But this was said later, much later. And at first, Nina Andreevna praised her son-in-law to all her friends and acquaintances: her daughter was lucky with her husband, you can’t say anything.

Marina gave birth to a daughter. And with this, the happy period in the life of their family ended. Of course, Muslim came to pick up Marina and her daughter from the maternity hospital, brought flowers and thanked the doctors and nannies. But at home he wiped the smile off his face, like taking off a mask, and said:

If you give birth to another girl, blame her. I need a son, an heir, support in my old age. I will not forgive you for my second daughter.

Marina heard marriage of Azerbaijani and Russian friends that many men react this way to the birth of girls. One of them, they said, intimidated his wife with divorce and other punishments to the point that the unfortunate woman gave birth. twins. Twin girls. Oddly enough, the happy father now breathes only with them, having completely forgotten about the desire to have a son. So everything will be crushed and formed. Muslim will calm down and love the baby. Moreover, he named her after his mother - Aziz. True, I did not consider it necessary to consult my wife about this.

If Marina was offended, then about. But Nina Andreevna threw a huge scandal:

It's not just your daughter! - she shouted to her son-in-law. - The girl will live in Moscow, she is half Russian! They might ask me if I am as much a grandmother to her as your mother. Only she is far away, and I am here, in my apartment.

“In my apartment,” the son-in-law told her outwardly calmly. - And in general, don’t you dare raise your voice at me, woman.

From that day on, he never called her by her first and patronymic name, or even just by her first name. Only “woman”. And I tried to do it in such a way as to offend and hurt more. First of all, turn her own daughter against her, in every possible way convincing Marina that her mother is a scandalous intriguer and she needs to buy her a room somewhere so that she can live separately.

Nina Andreevna might have agreed to this. But I didn’t want to lose my lover. Since the connection continued almost before Marina’s eyes. In any case, Muslim did not take any special precautions and, it seemed, even sought to be “caught red-handed.” But most likely he was deeply indifferent to this: if a woman allows herself to be treated like this, then let her think about the consequences.

Marina found out about what was happening literally under her nose almost a year later. Aziza was a fragile child, she was often sick, and Marina simply did not have the strength to think about anything. Moreover, Nina Andreevna was working, she had no intention of leaving her position as a senior economist at the bank, and babysitting her granddaughter from morning to evening was not part of her plan.

One night Marina woke up to her daughter crying. I changed her into dry clothes and wanted to go back to bed. But she really wanted to drink, and she went to the kitchen. The absence of her husband in the marital bedroom did not surprise her: Muslim often returned at dawn, or even did not come to spend the night at all. Something else struck me: the male voice that was heard in her mother’s bedroom. The man was clearly fighting off Nina Andreevna, and was not shy in his expressions. At first, Marina realized that her mother was blaming some guy for “getting pregnant” and now she would have to have an abortion. And another thing is that “two are not enough” for him and he runs to the side, among the girls. And then Marina realized with horror that she was being blamed for all this. Muslima.

It all ended suddenly. Two juicy slaps were heard in the room, and an enraged Muslim came out into the corridor. And when he saw Marina near the door, he gave another slap: “Don’t you dare spy on me, bitch!”

Marina was saved from an acute nervous breakdown, and perhaps even from suicide, by the fact that she was pregnant again, and this time without any complications. Knowledgeable women said that it was definitely a boy, all toxicosis and complications were from girls. And Marina had an obsession: to give birth to a son. Muslim will calm down, there will be peace in the family, and somehow they will sort out the mother. After all, you can buy her not a room, but an apartment, her husband has a lot of money.

Of course, upon discovering her husband’s relationship with her mother, Marina experienced a shock, and quite a bit. And after recovering from the first shock, she began to hate it. no, not Muslima - Nina Andreevna. She hated me so much that sometimes she was ready to kill. Literally. At first, she made scandals for the mother for any reason: she did not clear the dishes from the table, took the bath when the child needed to be bathed, and so on. Then scandals began to take place using so-called “profanity.” And then Marina began to beat Nina Andreevna, and tried to hit her so that marks would remain. Despite the fact that Nina Andreevna was far from an angel, her hand did not rise to give back to a woman who was six months pregnant. Moreover, my own daughter.

Muslim was quite amused by this, although in his presence he once and for all forbade women to sort things out. And in order to understand better, he reinforced his suggestion physically. Both the wife and mother-in-law got it equally. And all this in front of Aziza, who did not understand anything, but was terribly frightened.

In general, the atmosphere in the apartment, as they say, left much to be desired. In addition, the promised repairs never took place: Muslim was busy with some important matters and often went on business trips. Many things remained unpacked - in boxes, bales, suitcases. The taps were leaking, the doors were warped - the house was collapsing almost before our eyes. Marina didn’t care: until her mother moved out, she didn’t want any changes for the better. “Otherwise you won’t be able to kill her with boiling water from here.”

Of course, loud scandals could not remain a secret to the neighbors. Moreover, both Nina Andreevna and Marina periodically ran to complain about each other, first to one neighbor, then to the other. They threw enough dirt on each other. All the neighbors knew that Nina Andreevna deliberately broke the dishes and did not want to babysit her granddaughter, and Marina beat her mother herself and allowed her husband to beat her.

AND YOU, WOMAN, BE SILENT!

However, no one began to interfere: it was a family matter, and it was scary to get involved with Muslim. He did not hide the fact that he had a weapon and would use it if necessary. God forbid, he did not threaten the neighbors; on the contrary, he suggested: “If you have anything, say something. I have a gun, friends, we will quickly restore order, no rogue bandits will interfere.” But it is unknown whether he will need protection or not, but he has a gun. What if they really are bandits? And the relationship is ruined. Then bite your elbows.

Finally, Marina was taken to By the morning it became known - again a daughter. It was a disaster.

Muslim no longer brought any flowers or fruits to his wife. And the mother-in-law told her to get out of the apartment with her daughter and granddaughters. In a month at the latest. Where is not his concern. He warned that he needed a son.

Nina Andreevna could not restrain herself and, in the presence of one of her neighbors, told her son-in-law that he himself was to blame: what kind of a man is he if he cannot make a boy of his wife! Neither she nor Muslim still understand how miraculously she remained alive after that. Say this to an oriental man!

Nina Andreevna got scared and rushed to her closest friend for advice. She recommended contacting, firstly, a lawyer, secondly, a deputy, and thirdly, a journalist. It is not known why, but Nina Andreevna chose to start from the third point. That’s how I became acquainted with the history of this family. And I was able to meet and talk with Muslim thanks to a funny coincidence: one of my classmates was now working together with Muslim (both, by the way, are Azerbaijanis) and gave me something like a recommendation. Like, this one will be able to understand at least something, since she is an Arabist by education, and the study of Sharia was part of the institute program.

Muslim explained to me that, of course, he was not going to kick anyone out of the apartment. So, he got excited, he said it for the sake of a nice word. He knows the laws and is not going to break them. But he was very offended that he was not his son. And then there’s the mother-in-law.

Of course, there was no need to move in together. My mistake. But I thought it would be like ours: one woman in the bedroom, the other in the kitchen, and both of them are working with the children. But it worked. Marina gradually re-educated herself and began to understand what a woman can and cannot do. Well, she’s still young, she’ll get wiser. A. Yes, I didn’t beat her, just taught her a little. Here, you know, we don’t particularly coddle women. Only to the mother with all the respect she deserves. And for a wife, for sisters, a man’s word is law. That's why divorces almost never happen.

You should have married a Muslim woman. And Moscow is here, after all, you can’t lock up women and put on burqas.

Why a castle? Why a burqa? You just need to be more modest. I got married - I am responsible for her. Dress, put on shoes, feed. By the way, I bought all the products, my wife never set foot in the shops. Offend there. Let him invite his friends over if he wants to show off his dresses or rings. If she wants to visit a friend, I’ll take her by car. But you have to take me into account, right? If it weren't for my mother-in-law! And I was married to a Muslim woman for the first time. Everything was fine, but she didn’t have children, she had to get a divorce. I fell in love with Marina, got married, she loves me. Never mind, she will give birth to a son and I will carry him in my arms.

Marina also blamed her mother for everything. Although. my husband got it too. It is very difficult for a young, beautiful woman to become “just a housewife” and try to please only her husband. We have already forgotten those times when we sat locked up in towers. The “gene memory” has been erased.

I might have left, gotten divorced, but where? How will I live? I have no education, no profession, I don’t want to live with my mother, and I don’t have anyone else. Getting married again? So who will take me with two children? My friends are all jealous of me, I can see it. Now at least my head doesn’t hurt about food and clothes for girls. Muslim buys and brings. And what is rarely at home - is he the only one? Others don’t give money and don’t spend the night at home. And I hope that the third child will finally be a boy. Then everything will change.

ANOTHER MONASTERY?

I couldn’t help but tell Marina that nothing would change if she herself didn’t change. And, of course, it is impossible for her to live in the same apartment with her mother, no matter who is actually to blame for the family drama. Although, in general, both are to blame. We know the saying “don’t meddle in someone else’s monastery with your own rules.” We're still climbing.

And I don’t justify Muslim. If he took Marina to his homeland, then, willy-nilly, she would have to become what he wants her to be. But in Moscow it could have been softer. Why in Iran they strictly observe the laws of Islam: if they notice a woman with painted lips on the street, they take off their lipstick. with a razor, - this is how even the Iranians allow their women in Europe to “be like everyone else.” Someone else's monastery...

In general, everything is not so scary if you respect each other’s beliefs. I can give you a positive example. My college friend has been married to a Kabardian for twenty-three years. They live in Moscow, but until recently they often went to visit their husband’s parents in Nalchik. My friend is a normal Russian woman, she can smoke in company and drink on occasion. But in front of my husband’s relatives or fellow countrymen - God forbid! Then she sets the table and locks herself in the next room: a woman has nothing to do in a man’s company. All the Kabardian friends of Alik, my friend’s husband, are delighted:

“Russian wife, but just like an oriental one!”

Lena herself once admitted to me that she was simply initially bored in this company, and she went to her place. It turned out that this is how it should be.

The relationship with my mother-in-law is excellent, fortunately they see each other from time to time. And knowledge of the Kabardian language - about fifty active words - helps a lot in the markets: Alik's fellow countrymen get goods at half price. In general, they live, they will soon marry off their daughter, and then marry off their son. Lena would still like to marry her daughter to a Russian (“She’s spoiled with us, it will be difficult to adapt”). And he dreams of marrying his son to a Kabardian woman. “You know how much they respect their father-in-law and mother-in-law - you can go crazy! And the husband, of course, too, but the first thing is to please his parents. I know, I ate it myself. So I’ll marry my dunce and sit in front of the TV, and my daughter-in-law will look after me. Class!".

“HOUSE BUILDING” IN ISLAMIC

In principle, any normal man would want his wife to take care of the house and children, not flirt with strangers, and consider her husband’s word as law. This is what was once stated in Domostroy. And sons-in-law and mothers-in-law enter into “informal” relationships, regardless of religion and everything else. But. “Domostroy” has been fairly forgotten, and the norms of Sharia, especially as it relates to the family, are mostly respected. An Eastern man will behave like an Eastern man, whether his “Western” wife likes it or not.

So the East is a really delicate matter. And there's nothing funny about it really. Because you need to have at least a little idea of ​​the customs and traditions of the people to which your possible life partner belongs. And before the wedding - before, not after, after it will be too late! - agree on reasonable compromises, and mutual compromises, and not just