Congratulation joke with gifts. Comic birthday greetings with gifts

Comic congratulations with gifts for the anniversary of a man.

https://serpantinidey.ru/ Comic congratulations with gifts for a man's anniversary. It is easy and difficult to congratulate a man on his anniversary: ​​it is easy if you know the tastes and hobbies of the hero of the day well, it is difficult if he takes his hobby very seriously - then you can not please. Men, as a rule, like to receive either practical gifts or cool ones - so a congratulation, in which you can combine both, is a great option for a men's anniversary.

For example, before giving a real valuable gift(an envelope with money or a gift certificate), you can arrange a presentation - comic presentations that talk about the profession or hobby of the hero of the day - this will surely please the culprit himself and create an atmosphere of festive fun at the table.

With the help of a funny instruction or eyeliner, you can give the hero of the day a very practical and ordinary gift in an original way: a bottle of vodka, a watch, etc. Such a funny congratulations - great way bring joy to the hero of the day and add variety to the series, albeit beautiful, but stereotyped wishes ..

Here are collected best ideas Internet (thanks to the authors) on how to arrange comic congratulations with gifts for a man's anniversary.

1. Cool gift for the hero of the day " healing air"

(Auror A. Belimova)

For this comic gift, stock up on a three-liter jar. It needs to be rolled up (we advise you to apply a small amount of fir oil on the back of the lid, so that when you open the can, a barely perceptible aroma of pine forest is actually heard from it); stick a label on it with the following content: “Healing air of a pine forest. The content of ozone is 2 percent, oxygen - 23, carbon dioxide - 0.03 percent. Volume 3 liters. Use within an hour of opening.

You should not immediately show this present to the birthday man. First, read the following terms to him:

“- If you want to feel young at any age, you need to have an excellent pulse.

If you want to feel young at any age and admire beautiful girls You need 100% vision.

If you want to feel young at any age, admire beautiful girls and walk with them in the park, you need strong legs.

If you want to feel young at any age, admire beautiful girls, walk with them in the park and kiss them hard, you need fresh breath.

And if you want to enjoy all this, you need to breathe deeply!

And only after that you hand over a three-liter jar, loudly announcing its contents and purpose.

2. A comic gift for a man "Miracle slippers with instructions"

You can also give your beloved man ordinary slippers by attaching to them cool instructions or a memo in a beautifully designed version:

"Men's slippers. Our sizeless slippers, easily adapting to the shape and length of your foot, will give you confidence, emphasize your individuality and complement the image of a real man in an unexpected way.

Not a single woman will resist you if you are shod in slippers of our production!

Our slippers heal not only the body, but also the soul: they are recommended for tired feet with delicate skin as a remedy for fatigue, calluses, cracks and other problems.

Slippers are made of environmentally friendly material, they provide comfortable wearing all year round: they are warm in winter, not hot in summer. Feet supercooled in winter in our slippers will reach a healthy body temperature in a minimum period of time. The soft sole of the product contributes to silent movement, which is important at night.

Incredibly luxurious and stylish colors, in which this model is designed, will satisfy the most refined taste of the finest connoisseur and connoisseur of fashion. It has a beneficial effect on the nervous and visual systems, without destroying or irritating them.

Our slippers will be yours the best assistant in a delicate situation and hide unpleasant surprises: whether it be holes in socks, unwashed feet or uncut nails.

As a result of many years of research, it has been proven that when putting on our slippers, stress hormones die in the human body. Our slippers are your formula for success and happiness!

Be careful! Can induce a feeling of bliss!

Wear with pleasure!

3. Congratulations on gifts for the hero of the day-motorist.

Presenter: The life of our hero of the day is directly related to intersections, traffic lights

AND road signs. After all, the profession of a driver is life on wheels!

What do you wish, driver,

For a birthday, an anniversary?

Be in shape, our car enthusiast,

Step on the gas and don't worry.

We provide the gas pedal to the hero of the day this very minute. Expensive...!

So that the traffic police do not have to

To draw up protocol here today,

You have to drink and drive...

Coca-Cola drink!

(The hero of the day is given a jar of Coca-Cola.)

Let this bewitching drink cool you in hot weather, but it will not be able to quench your thirst for travel!

(Guest applause.)

Given that a car is the brainchild of any car enthusiast, we decided to give the hero of the day a few useful things.

Dear hero of the day!

We give this wheel

Put it in the spare.

(Kalach baked in the form of a wheel is awarded.)

Well, so that the patrol does not get to the bottom,

We hand you this spare wheel.

(The bagel is handed.)

After watching cool series about truckers,

We think that fuels and lubricants will also come in handy.

(A bottle of vegetable oil and vodka are given.)

Now the driver's transport is fully equipped and you can safely hit the road.

(Source: scenariev.net)

4. Comic congratulations "The hero of the day is our baby!"

Here in front of you baby
The baby is naked.
We need to dress him up.
So that the child does not freeze.

To keep your head from freezing
We will pull on the cap deftly. (give a cap)

So that nothing else happens
And from below the linen would not get wet,
Well, what are you laughing at, who doesn't happen to?
Pampers, in general, will not hurt us (they give diapers)

And if a bad mood comes
How to soothe a child in an instant?
The pacifier in the mouth, so as not to scream
I knew that life would be silent more (they give a pacifier)

(Source: menshiy.ru)

5. Congratulations from friends with a comic gift

We thought we were wondering
The whole evening they talked:
What does a person need
Crossed the 50-year milestone???

Is happiness in trinkets -
In crystal vases, pillows?
In a small cottage by the river,
Or on a ring finger?

Of course not! That's bullshit!
Better than money - no!

We drove to the store
And we bought a present!

Miracle apron - wallet,
You try it on my friend!!!

The apron itself is good
You will find six pockets!

The first "FOR FRIENDS" pocket!
There is always a glass in it!
And a stash to drive
When there is nothing to pour!!!

For "LOVE" the second pocket!
there lies a big surprise!
So that the soul does not go out the stove!
Here's a candle earring for you!
And a banknote for flowers,
To be ready for sex!

Our third pocket "PARENTS"
Call them day and night!
And to always be in touch -
I need to buy a card!

And the fourth "OUR CHILDREN"
And keep a pocket for them!
Children need what guys?
Well, of course, money!

The fifth pocket here is "WORK"
Our main concern!
Buy a ticket for yourself!
Not one, but three at once!

And the sixth pocket is "YOUR"
The most affectionate, dear.
What will you take from it?
Spend on yourself with love.
We didn't skimp on you
Not even a ruble was hidden.

Accept a gift from us
Remember us with a kind word.
happy birthday congratulations
And we want to live richly!

(Source: forum.in-ku.com)

(For a comic congratulation on donating a set of socks, see the link)

6. Comic photo session of the hero of the day with hats.

(hats for this congratulation can be given to the hero of the day, or you can simply beat their presentation for a photo shoot and entertainment)

Birthday has come
And the question before us arose,
What should we buy as a gift?
We decided to give a hat! (cowboy hat)

Oh, what a hat of tenderness,
Men to watch.
But it looks like it's out of season.
Summer style hat

Why won't I give it
And then I'll give you a bandana! (bandana)
Here in a bandana you are beautiful,
Just somehow so playful.

No, let's go in order:
We'll give you another hat.
Connection with sports will be strong,
If we donate a cap! (cap)

Why do you need a cap now
And she sits softly
Yes, and the color is not the topic at all,
No, let's drop this one.

To be funny then
Cap you need to give
Take it off, it's all nonsense -
Dressed up as a jester (cap)

He's not a troll today
And of course the king
Headdress for the throne
It's a royal crown! (crown)

7. Exclusive gift "Watch - idea generator"

Can be given as a birthday present unusual watch, absolutely exclusive, because you need to make them yourself. As a basis for a gift, you need to buy large Wall Clock, then order good quality pictures that will show the main dreams of the birthday man, for example, a car, apartment, cottage, good wife and many children - these will be larger pictures. Other dreams and desires - a heaped up TV, a fashionable breed dog or a TV dish - make a smaller scale.

Then all these prepared pictures need to be pasted instead of numbers on the dial. If the area allows, then in the center of the clock place an indelible inscription in the following way: “This is not the time to dream! It's time to act!"

8. Cool congratulations with gifts to the attendant "Come to the bath soon!"

This is a congratulation from friends with whom the hero of the day goes to the bath together - they read in turn, if there are few people, then two or three times.

1. We know that the hero of the day

He loves to take a bath!

There is a broom and a beer ... ..

We love the bath!

2. In the evening we leave the bathhouse

And ... .. name ... father. also with us

All muzzles are red,

Feeling great!

3. We came to congratulate you

It is immediately obvious: straight from the bath,

To make a toast

Well, drink and eat!

4. Be happier than everyone in the world,

Be always in the circle of friends

So that we all have to celebrate

Your 100th Anniversary!

5. We did not come here in vain,

Here are the gifts brought

Take them soon

Pour us a cup!

6. To have a lot of money,

If you suddenly feel sad

Health, happiness to be

Here's a gift for you, friend! (give a broom)

7. Decided to give a broom

Pour foamy beer

And a bar of soap.

To make it more fun! (gives soap)

Accept congratulations

On this glorious anniversary

And no later than Sunday

Come to the bath soon!

(Source: forum.vkmonline.com)

(If you arrange a few surprises on this topic, then a comic meeting of the hero of the day-lover of the bath will come in handy. From this collection)

9. A cool gift from close friends is a basin.

For the anniversary, we give a basin, it will always be just right.

You can wash the floors in it, you can milk the cows,

You can pick berries, burp after drinking,

You can wash with him in the baths, he will come in handy there,

You can wash clothes in it, you can wash your ass,

You can sow flour in it and hang it on a bitch

You can ride down the hill, it will always come in handy,

And how will it be (50.60...) we will come to you again,

Prepare okroshka for us, but find a bigger spoon,

We will pour okroshka into a basin, and we will celebrate the anniversary,

In general, you keep it, do not break it, do not crush it,

Do not leave it in the yard and put it away,

Congratulations on your anniversary, we want to drink everything now,

Who is from the pile, who is from what, and we will drink from it.

Gifting a birthday girl can be not only solemn, it can be used to arrange a game or entertainment moment. For example, any holiday is very enlivened - various congratulations from guests with a scattering of comic or useful, but presented with a humorous supply, gifts and trifles. Despite the fact that the reception is quite common, it invariably pleases both the hero of the occasion and her gathered guests, especially since you can come up with “gifts” for her specific habits, passions or profession.

Sometimes such congratulations with gifts are rather frivolous, but since they are given by very close people, this does not bother anyone, but, on the contrary, amuses and gives pleasure. If congratulations with gifts are arranged by colleagues, then its tone is usually more restrained, and the gifts themselves are more practical and stylish.

Here are collected comic congratulations - anniversary gifts for women various authors (thank you for the ideas!), which, if suitable, you can use in full or take them as a basis and come up with your own funny gifts and eyeliners for them, focusing on the age and tastes of a particular birthday girl.

1. Comic congratulations on the anniversary for a woman

"And we have a present for you!"

This is a fun table chant for the anniversary with the presentation of various gifts. After the words of the host, the guests should shout in unison:
"And we, and we have a present for you!"

We are here today for a reason
Gathered together, friends!
Everywhere jokes, congratulations,
Birthday wishes.
birthday girl just
Let's congratulate now!
Come on, guests, join
And scream with all your might
Like someone's got you for something
Bitten very hard.

Tanya got up early today

So that she would not be in a hurry.

Start before it's too late

Get yourself in order.

Tanya comes to a white bath,

To wash your head

And shampoo - well, not a drop.

What to do, how to be here?

Guests in chorus (takes shampoo out of the box.

So tired of dressing up
I began to make my way to the kitchen,
To drink coffee
Strength to restore.
But yesterday a neighbor came
And today there is no coffee.

Guests in chorustakes a bag of coffee out of the box.

We know Tanya has a sweet tooth,
She loves sweets.
She didn't eat candy day
And already upset.

Guests in chorus: "And we, and we have a present for you" - (gives candy).

So Tanya began to cook,
Got the best meat.
What to pepper the dish with
So as not to upset the guests?

Guests in chorus: "And we, and we have a present for you" - (Handing a bag of pepper)

Finally dinner is ready:

One hundred salads, cake and pilaf.
Here are all the dishes on the table,
Only salt mistress, where?

Guests in chorus: "And we, and we have a gift for you" - (handed .... a bag of salt)

Here comes the last guest
And a whole load of dishes.
What to do here, how to wash,
Where can I get a sponge?

Guests in chorus: "And we, and we have a present for you" - (give .... a sponge)

Don't take it as an insult
This joke is congratulations.
Smile, sing songs
Know that your friends are always with you!

(Source: nsportal.ru)

2. Comic congratulations with gifts for a woman from friends.

1. Happy birthday, congratulations,

We wish you all the best.

We give technology to you

And fashionable clothes.

To quickly clean the apartment

Get a wonderful car

Very easy to handle

Our "Roventa" vacuum cleaner.

He will wipe anyone's nose,

Will take away all your chaos.

Gently in your hands you will take

You wave in different directions

Instantly dirt from all over the apartment

Scatter - no dust.

He won't take up much space.

It will fit into any slot.

saves kilowatts,

Doesn't rattle and is lightweight.

Everything in the house will shine

Nowhere for dust to fly (give a broom)

2. Here is the device "Just in case",

In life, he is the best assistant,

With him, grief is not a problem.

He will always help you.

And the name is sonorous

Enema - scientifically.

It is not difficult to apply

We will provide instructions (gives an enema).

Use it every day

And your migraine will go away

He will remove all the slags from you

The body will look slender.

In general, we tell you

He is irreplaceable in life.

With extensive angina

You can gargle your throat

When renovating an apartment

You can spray paint.

Being with him at the dacha

You spray the bushes.

And then how crazy

Flowers will bloom everywhere.

I think you've made sure

What a miracle we give you

And now boldly through life

You will go with her.

3. As for the outfit

You quickly put it on

You will be a gorgeous woman in it

And Madonna is just a shadow.

Winter panties on wadding

Fit perfectly

Because in November

The cold is fierce in the yard.

Put it on quickly

Lure men to sex.

It's not that hard to warm up together

And you can't freeze

Wearing hot pants

You will live through any cold (gives diapers).

4. And boots from Versace

The last peep is not otherwise.

All their winter you carry

And you won't get cold feet (give slippers or socks or shoe covers)

Emphasize your figure

I broke my long leg.

Klavka Slate would herself

I would go crazy with envy.

In a headset with panties

It will be hot like in the Sahara

You carry gifts

And bless fate.

There will be a reason to drink

We will gather again

Happiness of women without end.

We wish you Happy Birthday.

(Source: mastervo.ru)

3. Cool congratulations from girlfriends with gifts "Country treats".

1. If the stomach wants to eat, do him honor:
You spread pate on bread, there is nothing tastier (give a jar of pate).

2. If you like delicious soup, boil some cereals,
Throw a sardine in here, maybe even half (gives a jar of sardines).

3. If you need lunch, there is no problem here:
Your millet will be delicious, if there is stew. (give stew).

4. Pour tea into cups, serve loaf!
Let the children laugh loudly, if there is condensed milk. (give condensed milk)

5. If you call solid cream to the dacha of society,
Do not rely on potatoes, open olives soon (give olives)

6. If you haven't bought bread, don't be sad, it's nonsense!
Open a jar of beans, you will always be full! (gives beans)

7. So that the picnic does not become a burden, so that they eat heartily,
open a jar of corn and lettuce feed! (gives corn)

8. Offering guests a snack, the same sandwich:
Put a cucumber on the bread, and a couple of sprats from the jar (give a cucumber and sprats)

9. Unsuccessful fishing will be made pleasant,
Fish meatballs in tomato sauce (gives meatballs)

10. If he grew up in the garden, then we will not give you back,
This jar of peas, we'll eat it in the winter! (give peas)

11. In addition to the treat, zucchini caviar!
There are a lot of vitamins, you should always eat it! (give zucchini caviar)

12. The sun is hot this summer. Even if there are many berries
Decorates our picnic, fruits are a gift to you from the south
We give at this moment (give fruit)

13. If you are too lazy to cook, but your stomach howled,
Porridge with meat will come in handy to moderate his ardor! (give porridge with meat)

14. A useless little thing, if you take it alone,
But it will come in handy for soup, you need to have it in the house (give tomato paste)

(Source: na-bis.com)

4. Congratulations with gifts "Women's things"

1. Frankly show - the beauty of your face and your body - and you will see in it what you did not want to see in it (give a mirror)

2. Your iron girlfriends, long-legged, long-armed - they keep their hair perfectly, and you look so crowned! ( give hairpins)

3. They will cut everything, cut it and put it in order. - on the big number "five", the manicure will shine! ( give manicure scissors)

4. You can’t find better girlfriends - and don’t go to a fortune teller - at least twist it, don’t twist it, everyone needs it very much ... (give curlers)

5. Gently removes make-up, makes a light massage - and at any moment our good friend - soft ... (give a sponge)

6. Always take them with you so that they are at hand, their labors are invisible. And if there is no water nearby - they are so important, these ..... (give wet wipes)

7. He is many hundreds of years old, but he looks fresh, we keep the most irreplaceable item at hand. Like the winds of a pure stream - thin ... (gives handkerchief)

8. Like a whole battalion of soldiers, they are in a box - they will remove extra touches, and cosmetics are sins (gives cotton buds)

9. There is just nothing in it: shadows, a pencil, tweezers, hairpins, mascara, a comb, varnishes, and there is also all sorts of rubbish. A very necessary thing - for the hostess ... (give cosmetics)

10. It happens plastic and gold, iron, silver and bone - he holds the hair with a strong hand, behind him they are like behind a Chinese wall. He helped every woman at least once - such an irreplaceable ... (bezel)

(Such congratulations can be completed by presenting the crown and awarding the title of "Beauty Queen" or another nomination - see)

5. Congratulations to the birthday girl from colleagues with gifts.

Perhaps you "lathered" to run away,
But your lot is to continue the work! (gives soap)

Who gets a can of beer
Live happily all year! ( give beer)

Eat bananas and coconuts
And expect rewards from fate! ( give banana)

While the boss is "removing shavings" from us,
Quietly make a cup of tea! ( give mug)

Get this tube as a gift,
To make every tooth shine in the sun! (give toothpaste)

Since you got chocolate,
Then you will not be bitter - it will be sweet! (gives chocolate)

When you drink cranberry jelly,
Forget the mundane carousel!
Let the world, as they say, wait!
And be healthy all year round (gives kissel)

Although this cream is inedible,
But the smell is just amazing! ( give hand cream)

To the one who receives this candle,

You have to travel the world! (gives a candle)

To write down where the pay went,
You will really need this pen! (give a pen)

We'll have to live, the work of grief,
And forget about the days of the calendar! (give a calendar)

And great love is waiting for you
And kisses all year round! (give a set of sponges)

Do you understand what the purpose of the gift is?
Life will be joyful and bright! (Give markers)

And you are "in juice", in the prime of life!
Among your friends you have no equal! (gives a bag of juice)

You are well versed in work
And you will be with us all year in high esteem (give a horseshoe)

Walking with a haircut will be beautiful,
Captivating everyone with a thick, fluffy mane (give shampoo)

You will be cheerful and energetic
And so the whole year will be great! (gives coffee)

(Source: tamada-julia.narod.ru)

6. Photoshoot of the hero of the day in hats.

It is very funny which is more suitable for home holiday or a holiday in the country, so that the culprit is not upset because she can ruin her hair (after all, she needs to try on each hat, show it to the guests and, if desired, take a picture in each as a keepsake)

Eyeliner: The French say that a real woman can make three things out of nothing: a salad, a scandal and a hat. Our (name of the hero of the day) can do much more, she can also arrange out of all this real holiday yourself and guests. That she will now demonstrate with brilliance to all of us.

Perhaps not all those present know that we are in constant cooperation with the great couturier of our time Zakidon Shlyapnikov and offer the hero of the day a personal all-season collection of his hats. Hats, mirror, photographer, everything ready? Then let's start!

First model: cap for sports "Champion"(Children's hat with a toe or baseball cap.)
Sport relieves us of stress
And will add health to everyone.
To stay young
Sports need to be done.
Summer, autumn, winter
Take up walking.
To overtake the bus
You have to wear a hat.

Second model: swimming cap "Dive" (Rubber bathing cap or shower cap)
To be always healthy
Not to cough, not to sniff,
You can run for a long time in the park
Or hang on the horizontal bar.
If water is given for life,
It’s more like a river, a shower.
Just put on a hat
After all, to her face, besides.

The third model: hat of the hostess "Chistulya" (From a sponge or washcloth)
If in household chores suddenly
It turns out that two legs and two arms are not enough,
And everything she needs to finish.

The fourth model: a hat for the work "All-seeing" (An option for the teacher is to sew glasses on four sides of the hat.)
Must have a hat
To see everything, to look after everyone,
So that work is in full swing soon,
So that not a second for laziness, yawning.
( teacher option.So that the student could not write off,
From someone else's notebook, "lick" everything,
He could not pull out the spur ...
This hat will fit.

Fifth model: a miracle hat "In the garden, in the garden" (Old straw hat)
The sun in the country mercilessly burns
Is there someone on all fours?
In the hottest, sultry time
Save your crown from harmful rays!
Avoid overheating
Put on your awesome hat!

Model 6: "Legend" hat for the weekend (Any original hat)
If, (name of the hero of the day), you suddenly
A friend will invite you for the weekend
Don't think, don't guess
Accept the offer!
Be gentle, be cheerful
Just don't forget your hat!
Weekend hat -
Not a hat, but a legend!

Seventh model: eco-hat for conservationists (Spotted khaki hat)
We know you love animals
Squirrels, hares, capercaillie,
Save your own river
And don't kill the fish in it.
To make the trees green
For birds to sing songs
Join the Greenpeace Society
To us, "green", such -
Not like us blue!

Model 8: Cruise Visa Hat (Old man's hat)
This hat is not worn on the head, but in the hands.
If you don't want to freak out
see pyramids,
Collect capital
And you go to the station.
You can easily get a visa
And go on cruises!

And finally, the ninth model: the invisibility cap (Hat big size, creeping over the eyes, or a knitted hat).

The grandiose model is made in a single copy, has no analogues in the world and has the supernatural property of invisibility. Let's try ... wonderful! Trying in vain - you still won't see anything!
This collection of hats is designed for all occasions and will help you feel real woman in all situations

7. Comic congratulations for a woman with gifts from close friends.

Hello, dear woman, you are good as a girl.
Though not 25 years old, vigorous mother,
We send you, my dear, a parcel for your birthday.
A little bit here, a little bit here, don't blame me.

If there is no CANDLE in the house, here it is, if the light goes out.
MATCHES and a PIECE OF SOAP so that you wash your face,
And here is a PACK OF CIGARETTES, suddenly you smoke, maybe not.
We have life, you’ll understand, you’ll smoke and drink here.
Here is a PIVASIK for order after the bath, al with the use.
We all blow it ourselves and recommend it to you.

SALA here is a piece 3, so eat or cook,
Stretch until summer, now it's a jewel.
Yes, look, do not get fat, it is better to feed the guests.
Let your foolish friends eat
Kohl do not feel sorry for them figure.

A BOTTLE OF HOLY WATER, drop by drop into the mouth before meals.
So as not to give to anyone, say: "Itself, they say, is not enough."
And the back suddenly hurts, rub it and hold it.
If you get sick, lie down, period, there is a grandson and a son-in-law and a daughter.
Let them wash and wash themselves, let them not disturb their mother.

As soon as you receive the package, take the bottle as soon as possible,

And write the answer as soon as possible, what you like, what you don't.
If there is no money in the house, tie a BROOM to your leg,
You need to wave a broom, collect money in a pile.

That's all goodbye girl, you are for us, well, like a sister,
Pour vodka into glasses and invite guests to drink.

Comic prizes and gifts

Comic prizes and gifts

Comic prizes

1) Here is your favorite perfume called "hee hee" (sample)

2) It will remind you how much to drink (thimble)

3) And you, mummy, just one penny, so that you live in abundance, without worries all year (penny)

4) We give you a chumodan, you need it on the farm (package)

5) And there is a gift for you that you can’t take your eyes off. You will show skill - and you will receive a gift. (name any number from 2012) (number 2 - that’s a good game, you didn’t get a damn thing. 0 - chocolate 1 - uli-tuli, you were scammed. 2 - I’ll read a piece of paper right now ... it says: “Fig you!”

6) Here is a magic ring, you should try it on, if it suits you at the right time, then wear it and be healthy. (drying)

7) You are lucky, from these hands you received - a laptop (notebook)

8) And your gift is just a miracle, I will tell you without further ado. Keep a set of raincoats (bags) as a gift

9) There is no better gift in the world than this shampoo in a briquette. (soap)

10) No, perhaps more practical than a gift than this miracle washcloth (washcloth)

11) And your gift is beauty: a simulator for the muscles of the mouth (chupa-chups)

12) Of course, I could not deprive you of my attention. Receive this branded flag with adoration. (flag)

13) As soon as there are serious failures in the repair, ultra-modern wallpapers will help. (toilet paper)

14) There is a special surprise for the most creative natures. I give you a musical instrument as a prize (rattle)

15) I don’t mind giving you great joy for the whole night (dummy and diaper)

16) Expected, perhaps you are a player, but today accept this fan (fan)

17) This prize was chosen carefully, it will definitely come in handy for you (adhesive tape)

18) The prize will be this little thing - here's a gel pen (pen)

19) To mess around with food, a grater is very useful (grater)

20) You don’t have a piping or a patch, but a pretty handkerchief (handkerchief)

21) This thing is strong and tenacious - you will be pleased with the clothespin (clothespin)

22) It’s not a pity to give such a prize, here’s a wonderful washcloth (washcloth) for you

23) Get this simple and easy prize (balloon) without whim

24) This prize is rich in sweetness - get chocolate (chocolate)

25) You don’t have a brooch or a badge, but a household hook (wall hook)

26) The prize is small, but I got used to living with the keys (keychain)

27) You will have to work hard, tinker with your prize (beets)

28) To create a hairstyle, you will need a comb (comb)

29) To live, not to be bored, enjoy this tea (a pack of tea)

30) You don’t have a rake or a watering can, but a convenient and necessary ruler (ruler)

31) The prize will be able to absorb moisture - paper will come in handy for you (toile paper)

32) It was nice to live in cleanliness, get this soap (soap)

33) Our prize will be appropriate - today you have a pencil (pencil)

34) If you mess around at the stove, our prize will be very useful (a box of matches)

35) You don’t have a cake or a cheesecake, but a wonderful toy (Christmas tree toy)

36) You will need this nice little thing (package) on the farm

37) Our prize is super, top class, it will come in handy more than once (notebook)

38) So that you remember us, we will give you a prize now (New Year's card)

39) You are good at work - you will get a lollipop (chupa-chups)

40) You don’t need a spoon or a ratchet, but, of course, this brush (any brush)

41) This prize to the table today is delicious, juicy, New Year's (orange)

42) We have a great prize, personally it is for you (pack of cookies)

43) We want to give you a rare prize - beautiful napkins (paper napkins)

44) So that love blooms in the soul, we hand you carrots (carrots)

45) You don’t have a copybook or primer, but this calendar (calendar)

46) To write letters to us, we hand you a notebook (notebook)

47) Prize - so that your teeth do not hurt, but always turn white (toothpaste)

48) This little thing is very old and, undoubtedly, irreplaceable (threads)

49) The prize is tasty and fragrant, it will be very pleasant for you (pack of waffles)

50) You don’t have a closet and don’t take it, but this postal envelope (postal envelope)

51) In order to straighten your hair more often, I will give you a model comb (fork)

52) Cooks a cake, pie and cupcake kitchen combine "Mulinex" (sieve)

53) I am very glad to give you the ultimate dream: your gift is an automatic washing machine (eraser)

54) A cleaning item that tastes very sweet. Easy to use - eat and order (snickers)

55) I give you Bohemian glassware (disposable tableware) for your table

56) For an artist who is not alien to excitement, I give a set for a professional bodypainting (brilliant green and iodine)

57) There is, perhaps, a more practical gift than this miracle lighter (a box of matches)

58) Of course, I could not deprive you of my attention. Adore this one Shaver(grater)

59) Every year this thing is only in higher demand. Above - a plane for mother-in-law, below - a vacuum cleaner (broom)

60) Only you, as a reliable friend, I will give a centrifuge (clothespin) on this day

61) And I'm very happy to give you a copier (carbon copy)

62) Like a true lady, and this is not nonsense, I want to give you a manicure set (file and sandpaper)

63) A gift for a real gourmet: snakes for two from a local Chinese restaurant (2 pack.doshirak)

64) Your win is quite rare - two paper napkins

65) Do you like sweets, or not - you have a handful of sweets

66) The prize is an original smallness, the baby's nipple went.

67) You got it like manna from heaven, the only piece of bread

68) There is no better prize than a plastic bag

69) To wander around the wide world, sew on this button.

71) You got a pencil - it will be yours from now on

72) To send greetings to relatives, you need an envelope

74) He flies like a mosquito, catch a balloon soon

75) It's not a lip, but a sponge - get it, dove

76) A steel pin for you so that suddenly your pants do not sleep

77) May it be brighter for you from this gift of Prometheus (matches)

78) You got a calendar - mark with fervor every day and every hour lived not in vain

79) To keep an income, you need a notebook

80) We give you toothpaste - you will always be toothy

81) We issue without a document, especially for you - a satin ribbon.

82) May the blood never stop flowing in your veins, so that you do not suffer from anemia, we hand over delicious carrots.

83) Be ruddy like a girl, so that your life is bright, and we only know that maroon-sweet beets will help in this.

84) In order not to catch the flu, it's time to use garlic.

85) Onion and garlic will always fit and come in handy in case of illness.

86) Eat a little potatoes to keep your figure, and remember that in your golden years you can be passionately loved.

87) There are a lot of vitamins in cabbage, we give it from the heart, you eat it with vegetable oil. Flowering, happiness, beauty.

88) Like a tomato is good, it is useful if the soul hurts.

89) But a crispy cucumber, eat it and you'll be fine.

90) This apple is rejuvenating, an all-powerful remedy for love.

91) And, of course, a zucchini, so that there is a push in business.

» Congratulations to gifts in verse for a comic man

Comic birthday greetings with gifts

Blindfold the birthday girl
We are 100% intrigued!
What is a gift with delivery
So she's been waiting for a long time?

What it is is still a secret.





The gift is just an obsession.
Well, open your eyes!
And here's a surprise!
He is yours! Hooray!
(This comic congratulation is suitable for presenting any gift to a woman) We give you a gift
He certainly from the heart,
He is handsome, useful, bright,
Hurry up to use it.
Remember your friends, of course
Invite more often.
Be a diligent hostess
Treat your husband deliciously.

Lips swollen with love
And blush only from passion
Your cheeks burned!
(As a gift, accompanied by this poem, any kitchen utensils, crockery, household kitchen appliances, maybe a cookbook, tablecloth, etc.) can come up. Our dear birthday boy!

Still a joy for friends -
Birthday, anniversary!

It's also a reason to donate.
Because - see for yourself! -
We have come here with gifts.
Birthday boy, dear!
We are here for you with all our heart!
But first, pour it.
Get drunk, respect people!
No, we don't need alcohol
We would like such a drink
Just to clear your throat!
And we'll give you
Everything we took with us.
It's still a lot of work...
After all, there are a lot of gifts!
Dear hero of the day
We are generously pleased to give.
And without asking for a reward
Let's get started. Is everyone ready?
We are for a dear friend
Haven't regretted anything
Barely dragged.
Gift number 1.
Look here:
It says "WATER".
And although there is no water,
Let's highlight this point:
After all, the bottle, even if empty,
But what a beautiful one!
Suitable for everything at once.
Well, first of all, it's a vase.
Secondly, the dishes are
And not only for the bouquet:
For water and compote,
And for tea with bergamot.

Gift number 2.
Here's another hello:
Pack of cigarettes.
And "hello" - from childhood he:
Do you remember - summer, the stadium ...
Hundred meters on physical...
Sitting in the yard...
Cigarettes were also
Will you still deny it?
Even if you don't smoke for a long time
We give a pack anyway.
It only takes a glance
To understand: smoking is poison!


(in these words they present a pack of cigarettes - preferably empty)
Gift number 3.
Look how beautiful
This beer can!
You can make a rattle
Very nice toy
Throw some coins in there!
What is not the joy of the hero of the day?
Rattle - isn't it?
And a coin box.
(in these words they present an empty beer can)
Gift number 4.
Here's another present for you
Under the name Eurocent,
If simply - a penny
Made from excellent stainless steel.
For what? So it's not a secret:
From donated coins
Happy birthday!
We will not take the present back!
It's money, and besides,

(they present a coin and throw it into the already donated beer can)
Gift No. 5
Here's another surprise
Not a whim, not a whim:
This is a candy wrapper.
And why, you ask, is this?
We want to infect with an example:
Become a collector!
This is the first copy.
Do you understand, jubilee?
Who buys paintings
Who collects coins...
Fanfiction is more reliable though:
After all, paintings are more expensive!
And, giving candy to friends,
Remove fanfiction at the same time.
(for Gift No. 6
And from refractory steel
We give you a pin.

For gum! Got it, friend?
You might say, “What is it?
After all, now the underwear is different -

What kind of conversation?
But take it, do not torture your friends,

(on these words they present an ordinary steel pin)
Gift No. 7
Look here mate:
It's a matchbox!

It's not empty at all.
Even if you are not a tourist,
Not an avid climber
But from now on you can
Light a fire in your soul!
(in these words they present a box of matches)
Gift No. 8
We are happy to give you
This tube of lipstick.
And although it is completely empty,
But beautiful female lips
He keeps touch.
Hey tube! A feast for the eyes!
And I can give advice:
Throw it in the enemy's pocket!
Revenge him in full
For you his wife!
(an empty tube of lipstick is presented at this place)
Gift number 9.
Look what a beauty:
At least while the jaw is in place,
Behind the teeth - an eye for an eye!

(rummaging through the box)
The hero of the day is ready to accept
This dental floss?
Oops, looks like they screwed up...
But we hardly repent -
The thread is simple, ordinary

And they made a mistake - it does not matter:
They will always come in handy!
(in these words they present a spool of ordinary thread, maybe not a new one)
Gift number 10.
And now seriously
We will solve the "dental problem".
This is pasta. Yes, a tooth!
Such a fragrant one!
We know, we've tried...
True, we doubt gnaws:
Is it worth giving?
Because buy a new one
We didn't make it today.
But we will give - in fact!
(in these words they present a tube of toothpaste - in accordance with the text, in this case, it is the used tube of toothpaste that should be taken)
Gift number 11.
We give you a cup! Yes friends?
Look - it's yours!
Know you were looking for her at home?
We see - the cup is familiar.
What for? The answer here is simple:
There will be a wonderful toast -
Well, and you, as usual.
From the dishes drink the usual!

Don't get drunk and don't be bored!
Have a Pepsi if it's hot.
Is it better to drink from a gift?
(on these words a cup belonging to the birthday man is presented)
Gift number 12.
All gifts are over.

The reason will be suddenly what
And the envelope is at hand!


However, it is better not to pull
And look at the envelope!
(in these words they present an envelope with money prepared as a gift)
cool scene for a birthday - handing comic gifts And now it's time for all of us
Rang a friendly "cheers"!
Our beautiful birthday
Birthday dear,
We came to you with a gift
With a bag full, big.
What is there? You guess!
You've been dreaming about it for a long time
And enjoy today!
You became the owner...

Don't part with him now.
Put it with you to sleep
Show off your gift



And give a gift, love.

We all went around the shops

But we got a present!
You tear off the packaging,
We can't wait to find out


Shy, sweetheart.
They came to you with a gift
Just like you, bright!
The gift is tied with a bow,
And what's in there? We won't tell!
You will open it yourself
So that you can be surprised.
Believe we tried so hard
And they tried to please.
For this, meet us soon

Happy Birthday to You!
We congratulate unusually
And the gifts will be handed out personally!
1.) Here is a gift for the soul,
Don't be surprised
Sponges tender make up,

2.) And this gift is important!
Even if it's paper.
He always rescues

3.) If a hole has appeared,
Something, somewhere lost weight,
That will certainly come in handy


The French say strictly:
Just wash your hair

5.) So that the legs do not hurt,
Not cold, not sweaty
We give you slippers

6.) You have a big sweet tooth,
We know this for sure!
We give you candy

7.) So that the light burns in the house,
Our gift will come in handy
This is a light bulb for you

8.) Don't go crazy
Here, take a comb.
Straighten the shreds in the mane,
Seduce the man.
9.) Finally, we give a pen,
To paint a paycheck! Expensive____________
Happy birthday to you!
I wish you, most importantly, health, more strength, patience, understanding in the family, so that your children do not upset you, and your grandchildren often please you, and so that the crisis bypasses you! And as a gift to you, this ___________ to simplify your everyday worries, save time for yourself! “And we, and we, have a present for you!”
Hello, well done man!
We're here for a birthday party!
Yes, with empty hands
And funny gifts!

And run to the bath
To shave your beard
There is no foam again, etit!

2.) Here he shaved, combed his hair
And looked at the shirt

Well, where do I do it?

3.) Dressed up for work,
Now it's time for breakfast
Drink coffee, where is the cup?
Ugh you, in the sink, dirty ...

4.) You run to work,
Belatedly, you're trembling...
To get up early


5.) You came to work -
Documents - a bunch!
There is no handle, as for evil,
Well, fuck .. whose case!

6.) At work you are tired,
Walked to the car
Oh how it snowed
Windshield glass!

7.) And so that the wife waits at home,
I was dying of desire
Here's what we give you...
Though you yourself: OH-GO-GO!

8.) To calculate the premium,
Yes, do not strain your brains,
We give you a calculator
I really need an account!

Finally, we wish
To make all dreams come true
And the gifts came in handy
And they came to the occasion!
All in unison: - After all, with us, with us, all the gifts are just class !!!
We wish you all the best.
We give technology to you
And fashionable clothes.
To quickly clean the apartment
Get a wonderful car
Very easy to handle
Our "Roventa" vacuum cleaner.
He will wipe anyone's nose,
Will take away all your chaos.
Gently in your hands you will take
You wave in different directions
Instantly dirt from all over the apartment
Scattered - no dust.
He won't take up much space.
It will fit into any slot.
saves kilowatts,
Doesn't rattle and is lightweight.
Everything in the house will shine


In life, he is the best assistant,
With him, grief is not a problem.
He will always help you.
And the name is sonorous
Enema - scientifically.
It is not difficult to apply

Use it every day
And your migraine will go away
He will remove all the slags from you

In general, we tell you
He is irreplaceable in life.
With extensive angina
You can gargle your throat
When renovating an apartment
You can spray paint.
Being with him at the dacha
You spray the bushes.
And then how crazy
Flowers will bloom everywhere.
I think you've made sure
What a miracle we give you
And now boldly through life
You will go with her.
3. As for the outfit
You quickly put it on
You will be a gorgeous woman in it
And Madonna is just a shadow.
Winter panties on wadding
Fit perfectly
Because in November
The cold is fierce in the yard.
Put it on quickly
Make men laugh.
It's not that hard to warm up together
And you can't freeze
Wearing hot pants

4. And boots from Versace
The last peep is not otherwise.
All their winter you carry

Emphasize your figure
I broke my long leg.
Klavka Slate would herself
I would go crazy with envy.
In a headset with panties
It will be hot like in the Sahara
You carry gifts
And bless fate.
There will be a reason to drink
We will gather again
Happiness of women without end.
We wish you Happy Birthday. "Country Treats"




























But it will come in handy for soup, you need to have it in the house (they give tomato paste) "Women things"











Who gets a can of beer

Eat bananas and coconuts

















We'll have to live, the work of grief,

And great love is waiting for you









You will be cheerful and energetic
And so the whole year will be great! (gives coffee) Eyeliner:

First model: cap for sports "Champion" (Children's cap with a toe or baseball cap.)

And will add health to everyone.
To stay young
Sports need to be done.
Summer, autumn, winter
Take up walking.
To overtake the bus
You have to wear a hat.
Model 2: Swimming cap "Dive" (Rubber swimming cap or shower cap)
To be always healthy
Not to cough, not to sniff,
You can run for a long time in the park
Or hang on the horizontal bar.
If water is given for life,
It’s more like a river, a shower.
Just put on a hat
After all, to her face, besides.
The third model: hat of the hostess "Clean" (From a sponge or washcloth)


And everything she needs to finish.
Fourth model: a hat for work “All-seeing” (An option for a teacher is to sew glasses on four sides on a hat.)
Must have a hat

So that work is in full swing soon,




This hat will fit.
Fifth model: miracle hat "In the garden, in the garden" (Old straw hat)
The sun in the country mercilessly burns



Avoid overheating
Put on your awesome hat!
Model 6: Legend Weekend Hat (Any original hat)

A friend will invite you for the weekend
Don't think, don't guess
Accept the offer!
Be gentle, be cheerful
Just don't forget your hat!
Weekend hat -
Not a hat, but a legend!
Model 7: Eco-hat for conservationists (Spotted khaki hat)
We know you love animals
Squirrels, hares, capercaillie,
Save your own river
And don't kill the fish in it.
To make the trees green
For birds to sing songs

To us, "green", such -
Not like us blue!
Model Eight: Cruise Visa Hat (Old Men's Hat)

If you don't want to freak out
see pyramids,
Collect capital
And you go to the station.
You can easily get a visa
And go on cruises!
And, finally, the ninth model: an invisibility hat (A large hat that crawls over the eyes, or a knitted hat).

This collection of hats is designed for all occasions and will help you feel like a real woman in any situation Hello, dear little woman, you are good as a girl.












Let your foolish friends eat
Kohl do not feel sorry for them figure.










Pour vodka into glasses and invite guests to drink. Congratulations on your anniversary today and we want to wish you good health!
You say, you say
What do you need, what do you need
We will give. we will let you chew ... (GARLIC)
We wish you to be beautiful and smart, so that sadness does not come to your house!
You say, you say
What do you need, what do you need
You say, well, we'll take it down .. (CURLERS)
We wish you great happiness in the house, so that rubles ring in your pocket!
You say, you say
What do you need, what do you need
We will give. we will give, take it ... (penny)
At work, so that (name) never swears, so that her mouth is locked!
You say, you say
What do you need, what do you need
We will give. we'll give you a nipple. (PACIFIER)
Well, if you want us to be silent, guess for yourself what we want!
You pour, you pour
What do we need, what do we need
Well, we, well, we will shut up.
(Two guests participate, at the end they give a rolling pin)
First:
Grandmothers told us yesterday
As if they heard
What is your anniversary here,
Here we come quickly.
Second:
For a long time they could not decide
What to buy as a gift.
The list is long written
And then we both decided.
First:
The steamboat is of no use to you,
Crossed out because.
We put a cross on the locomotive:
Takes up a lot of space.
Second:
The tank will not enter your garage,
The plane won't get in there.
The economy does not need a rocket,
We didn't take her for it.
First:
Kamaz big - rejected,
We removed the tractor from the list,
Submarine .... the lake will spoil,
Helicopter, but where is he going to land!?
Second:
You can donate a car
But this is hard to please.

And the scooter is quite a shame.
First:




Second:




First:




Second:



In short, we decided to give a rolling pin (give a rolling pin) "Pasta beads".
We can't have you on your birthday
Expensive gifts present,
Because with such and such prices
We can't buy anything anywhere.
But do not think that we are not attentive,
You are more precious than any gifts,
We just have a wonderful day
All that's left is to love you.
Although we can’t give you a birthday
Giving expensive gifts
But still with great effort
We were able to buy some.
And we want to wish you from the bottom of our hearts
Sea of ​​happiness, health, love,
And I'll give you a necklace
And put on your shoulders.
You protect him from moths, frost,
In it you meet the dawn and sunset,
In a hungry hour, boil it for yourself,
And you don't have to spend a lot.
If sadness and sadness visit you,
Disperse them with a miracle of miracles,
And sell this wonderful gift,
And buy an expensive Mercedes. Bottle with pacifier.
(for a joke, we put a pacifier on a check)

We didn't come here in vain
The table is set, glasses are poured,
Maybe an October holiday?
Maybe, New Year meet?
Or May came here?
celebrating a birthday
Our ... half a hundred and five
Among us is a newborn
We congratulate all of her.
But, and she should drink from a glass,
The idea is not given!
We will give this pacifier.
Let suck - it's time
And to us for her health
It's time for a drink!
Let it grow and not get sick,
Gathers us once a year.
If she had health
And the rest will come! "Fruit cocktail".








Fruit language - little known
And sometimes they don't understand
That, having tasted a delicious fruit,
Seduction will come.
We are for _______ today
Made a cocktail
To make _________ more beautiful
And beautiful as a model!
Put a lot of fruit
To taste this dessert
Our _________ shone,
And she was the most beautiful!


If you eat these fruits!
Here's a sweet banana
Ripe, groovy,
If you want to be happy
Take it with you.
Ripe, juicy orange -
Fruit contains the first vitamin.
To always be healthy
Eat slices without shame.
So that in life _____________
Ball of peace and harmony


Let's add champagne to our fruits! (pouring cocktail)

Comic congratulations on your birthday with the presentation of cool gifts

Hello our long-awaited day,
We didn't come here in vain
The table is set, glasses are poured,
Maybe an October holiday?
Maybe celebrate the New Year?
Or May came here?
celebrating a birthday
Our ... half a hundred and five
Among us is a newborn
We congratulate all of her
But, and she should drink from a glass,
The idea is not given!
We will give this pacifier.
Let suck - it's time
And to us for her health
It's time for a drink!
Let it grow and not get sick,
Gathers us once a year.
If she had health
And the rest will come!















(We give the hero of the day a towel.)




Happy birthday, we wish you all the best. We give technology to you, And fashionable clothes. To quickly clean the apartment Take a marvelous car, It is very easy to handle Our "Roventa" vacuum cleaner. He will wipe anyone's nose, Remove all your chaos. Gently you will take it in your hands, You will wave it in different directions In an instant the dirt from the whole apartment Will scatter - there is no dust. He won't take up much space, He'll fit into any crack. Saves kilowatts, No buzzing and lightweight. Everything in the house will shine, There is no place for dust to fly. (broom) Here is the device "Just in case" In life, he is the best assistant, With him, and grief - it does not matter. He will always help you. And the name is sonorous Enema - in a scientific way. It is not difficult to apply it, We will attach the instructions. (enema)
Use it every day And your migraine will pass. Slags will remove everything from you. Your body will look slender. In general, we tell you, In life, he will not replace. With extensive sore throat You can gargle when repairing the same apartment You can spray paint. Once in the country with him, you spray the bushes And while the crazy ones Flowers bloom everywhere. I think you are convinced, What a miracle we are giving you And now you will boldly go through life together with him. As for the outfit, you'll put it on soon. You'll be a gorgeous woman in it. And Madonna is just a shadow. Winter panties on wadding They will come in handy Because in November, the cold is fierce in the yard. Quickly put on Men to laughter lure. It's not so difficult to warm up together And it's impossible to freeze. Putting on hot leggings You will live through any cold. (diapers) And the boots from Versace The last squeak is no different. You carry them all winter And you won't get frostbite on your feet. (Slippers, socks, shoe covers) Emphasize the figure in them. Long leg twisted. Klavka Slate would have gone crazy on her own. In a headset with shorts It will be hot like in the Sahara You carry gifts And bless fate. There will be a reason to drink We will gather again Happiness of women without edge. We wish you Happy Birthday.












In order not to be wise for a long time,
I decided to give
Precious Potion Root
For soul and health

always put the hell on the table.
To forget our problems
Put horseradish in soup and porridge.
If a mondrazh torments you,
Horseradish on bread and roll smear.
And so that there are no problems
Fuck all things.
It has every vitamin
Will add vigor, strength.
To work until dawn
Fuck your head.
He is a balm from a beatner -
And if they come up
You can send everyone to hell!










What can I say, beautiful!
We give you this exclusive.

hero of the day, rather pour a glass for a gift to us! Who keeps score for all the stars? Well, of course, the astrologer! Only flash where the star, He arrives there. Anniversary I from heaven Got a miracle of miracles. Congratulations on your anniversary. I promise you a lot of happiness. He brought many lights. It takes a lot of effort to catch them. On the command "three-four!" - you need to smile wider. And on "time!" or on "two" - get ready first ..... Decided today our advice:
The gift must be special
None of the other gifts
Such. There is no tastier muffin!
Not tormented by thirst for you,
Didn't stop working
We will give you kvass!
We will take care of you!
You were a baby too
And they ate a lot of chocolate.
Now, as an adult, nothing
Don't forget about your childhood!
Let it not be accepted to give
For men of a modest bouquet,
We want to thank you
What are you with us in winter and summer! Every woman, not only Piekha,
Life is often divided into important milestones:
There is an intimate life, it is personal,
So sweet and all strawberry.
There is family life, salty,
When sober, when drunk.
There is a mother, she is bitter,
Especially when the child is crying.
There is a social, slightly sour.
Falls, ups, income with a sheepskin.
And on my birthday, pre-anniversary
I will wish, probably, the main thing:
So that you do not lose your taste for life,
I could quit everything and start over.
And so as not to bend your back in vain,
I give you a basket of food.
There are four flavors of products
There is also a bonus - a bag of "juice"! Got a certificate?
Everyone here is happy for you
We will arrange for you now
From the gifts of the hit parade!
I give you a notebook
Don't spend a lot of money.
To know your expenses
You will write them in a notebook.
I'll give you a watercolor.
If you suddenly run aground,
Draw a zero on a bill
And it's April again!
I'll hand you a cardboard
Did not happen to bummer.
You write down your thoughts
On cardboard at the table!
Here's our pencil
Don't lose our gift.
If suddenly something happens. Everyone knows him at Lenfilm
And Hollywood knows who he is.
After all, he was so lucky
His cousin is Sharon Stone!
He will stab the enemy with a sword
And this, in general, is not strange,
Inherited dexterity and courage
He received from D "Artagnan.
Good in the ranks and on parade,
Quick in decision making.
After all, he is not easy uncle,
He is the Minister of the Interior!
Played with him on the same team,
He gave him balls.
He was Ronaldo instead of his mother,
Until he went to Real Madrid! Today is the holiday of fools -
Russians, hello!
A sea of ​​jokes and poems -
Who has teeth?
Who has a sharper tongue
And stronger nerves
He is famous today
The one today is the first!
If you got into trouble
First of April,
Then don't be a fool yourself -
a week ahead!!! I congratulate you,
Holiday - a prankster!
Nobody got bored
April Fool's jokes
Or rather the other way around:
People are happy to laugh! Let's laugh
Good luck - smile
And meet failure
No sorrow and no tears.
April Fool's Day is a good holiday.
Let sadness get bogged down in laughter
And then we are omnipotent
And this is serious. In vain the first of April
They called it all a day of laughter!
To whom - the working week,
And stupid - fun!
Who would distract you from work -
He wasn't just born
And we are today
They came to you like this, without a toast, -
Congratulate on your holiday
The one who is our boss,
Let it be stupid, but naive
Let ours not grieve you!
Maestro! Humor is useless
Where the process is working,
And let it be funny
Who doesn't want to work? Colleagues! Let now
Read congratulations without jokes,
I have known you for a long time,
Severe team, and not a bit
Men are harmful and vicious,
Debts are not in a hurry to return,
And women are absurd and quarrelsome,
And the appearance - whoever looks - will drown!
It's time, ah, it's time for you to get better
Men don't whine or gossip
You tortured the boss with idleness,
Desire to knock and gossip,
Well, in a word, I will leave for the capital
I'm right this week...
How do you not suit these faces! ..
Did you understand everything? Happy first of April! Anniversaries are no joke
Honestly, I want to say.
Imagine for a minute,
That turned back time.
Our hero of the day is still a teenager,
And at school he studies at "five"
Oh, it would be difficult for all of us
Check his notebooks!
Alas, my friend, this does not happen in life,
But I know you're always a youngster at heart!
Let's congratulate the birthday boy
And let's drink to his health, finally!
We are welcomed as guests
The hero of the occasion.
Congratulations to all words
Forgotten at the same time
How we treated you!
Who will believe: fifty
Are you fulfilled? naughty,
Looks like we have eyes!
You can't give so much!
Stay like this
Like today, young people!
Well, who, tell me, is to blame
In a flash of deeds, worries and dates?
Well, contrary to the anniversary,
Like 30 years ago
Always beautiful and easy.
The advantages of all can not be counted ...
Stay the same as here
They appeared before us at 50.
And remember that there is a miracle:
Fulfill what you dreamed about!
Congratulations! I wish you
The strength of male and female attention,
Business to develop to the scale of the universe,
Cold beer in a warm company.
One more time about women's attention...
Bourgeois money in a leather wallet,
Less in life to meet frostbitten,
A cool wheelbarrow and green light,
(To beer, I forgot, more salty)
Soak our enemies all in the toilet,
And, accordingly, world peace!
I want to wish you
Carefree life
Parties, discos,
Fantastic holidays
So that your rivals
Whoa, sigh
And men from love
They lost their heads!
How important it is to do everything in life:
Plant children and give birth to a house,
And also do not forget to build a tree,
Yes, and I would like to have a model wife ...
All this will be with you, I know for sure
In a different order, maybe, but not the point.
Happy birthday to you today
And I'll try to visit!
I want a sea of ​​beer
And an ocean of snacks
To make life fun
Cool, foamy, delicious
For friends to walk
By the sea in shorts
And the place was called
Your beer spa!
May luck always follow you
In the apartment, in the car, at work, in the country
Good luck shopping, good luck selling
In suits at the meeting and swimming trunks on the beach
And also to everyone we support.
Good luck will come soon!
Life without turmoil!
Laughter for no reason!
Rough fun!
Easy hangover!
Happiness endless!
And eternal health!
Buddy, I wish you cool parties
Merry beautiful Ol, Mash and Irinok
Boring winter, flying summer
I wish to be fashionably and stylishly dressed
Tickets happy always and everywhere
And so that friends help out in trouble! For the anniversary, we give a basin, it will always be just right.
You can wash the floors in it, you can milk the cows,
You can pick berries, burp after being drunk,
You can wash with him in the baths, he will come in handy there,
You can wash clothes in it, you can wash your ass,
You can sow flour in it and hang it on a bitch
You can ride down the hill, it will always come in handy,
And how will it be (50.60...) we will come to you again,
Prepare okroshka for us, but find a bigger spoon,
We will pour okroshka into a basin, and we will celebrate the anniversary,
In general, you keep it, do not break it, do not crush it,
Do not leave it in the yard and put it away,
Congratulations on your anniversary, we want to drink everything now,
Who is from the pile, who is from what, and we will drink from him. Comic gift (hell)
In order not to be wise for a long time,
I decided to give
Precious Potion Root
For soul and health
"Horseradish - oops", "horseradish ponadol",
always put the hell on the table.
To forget our problems
Put horseradish in soup and porridge.
If a mondrazh torments you,
Horseradish on bread and roll smear.
And so that there are no problems
Fuck all things.
It has every vitamin
Will add vigor, strength.
To work until dawn
Fuck your head.
He is a balm from a beatner -
And if they come up
You can send everyone to hell! Money as a gift. How jealous, girlfriend
The bridegroom snatched!
Here's a pillow from us
To sleep with him longer!
He's cute, of course.
He is courteous and he is rich!
You will live with him carelessly,
Still, stock up:
So that we come to visit you,
You make us drink wine!
We'll eat with a sweet bunch
Let's take a look at your entire home!
Don't forget about us, girlfriend
Remember and call us
We share as a reward,
Yes, and you come to us!
Be happy forever
Your life is like heaven!
In a white wedding dress.
You make a wish!
We believe it will come true
For you we drink for a long time!
Never be sad
Throw us your bouquet!
Whoever catches will get married
And he will find his destiny!
Let your passion not cool down
We are all waiting for kisses! Bitterly! Blindfold the birthday girl
We are 100% intrigued!
What is a gift with delivery
So she's been waiting for a long time?
Desired, new, delightful,
What it is is still a secret.
Only to her, the captivating beauty
We will hand over what is not yet available.
Accept congratulations joking,
And be happy on your birthday
How long have we been tormented in search
The gift is just an obsession.
Well, open your eyes!
And here's a surprise!
He is yours! Hooray! We give you a gift
He certainly from the heart,
He is handsome, useful, bright,
Hurry up to use it.
Remember your friends, of course
Invite more often.
Be a diligent hostess
Treat your husband deliciously.
To make your eyes glow with happiness
Lips swollen with love
And blush only from passion
Your cheeks burned! Our beautiful birthday
Birthday dear,
We came to you with a gift
With a bag full, big.
What is there? You guess!
You've been dreaming about it for a long time
And enjoy today!
You became the owner...
(At this moment, they take out the desired gift for giving a happy birthday to a man)
Don't part with him now.
Put it with you to sleep
Show off your gift
And love your friends! The weather is beautiful outside
Birthday, dear, is yours,
We want to congratulate you so much,
And give a gift, love.
We tried so hard to please you
We all went around the shops
Shed blood, sweat and tears (jokingly)
But we got a present!
You tear off the packaging,
We can't wait to find out
After a long search,
Will the gift be to your liking? You are a beautiful girl
Shy, sweetheart.
They came to you with a gift
Just like you, bright!
The gift is tied with a bow,
And what's in there? We won't tell!
You will open it yourself
So that you can be surprised.
Believe we tried so hard
And they tried to please.
For this, meet us soon
And have a delicious cake! Hello dear friend!
Happy Birthday to You!
We congratulate unusually
And the gifts will be handed out personally!
1.) Here is a gift for the soul,
Don't be surprised
Sponges tender make up,
Kisses will relish! (Pomade)
2.) And this gift is important!
Even if it's paper.
He always rescues
Never fails! (toilet paper roll)
3.) If a hole has appeared,
Something, somewhere lost weight,
That will certainly come in handy
Our gift for the girl. (Threads and needles, can be in a set)
4.) If everything is bad in the mirror,
The French say strictly:
Just wash your hair
Our shampoo is always with you! (Shampoo)
5.) So that the legs do not hurt,
Not cold, not sweaty
We give you slippers
Will they fit the leg? (Slippers)
6.) You have a big sweet tooth,
We know this for sure!
We give you candy
From my big soul! (Candies)
7.) So that the light burns in the house,
Our gift will come in handy
This is a light bulb for you
Our red girl! (Bulb)
8.) Don't go crazy
Here, take a comb.
Straighten the shreds in the mane,
Seduce the man.
9.) Finally, we give a pen,
To paint a paycheck! Hello, well done man!
We're here for a birthday party!
Yes, with empty hands
And funny gifts!
1.) In the morning you get up from the couch,
And run to the bath
To shave your beard
There is no foam again, etit!
All in unison: - And we, and we have a present for you! (Shave foam included)
2.) Here he shaved, combed his hair
And looked at the shirt
Here are those times! Well, where's the tie?
Well, where do I do it?
All in unison: - And we, and we have a present for you! (As a gift a beautiful tie)
3.) Dressed up for work,
Now it's time for breakfast
Drink coffee, where is the cup?
Ugh you, in the sink, dirty ...
All in unison: - And we, and we have a present for you! (As a gift mug)
4.) You run to work,
Belatedly, you're trembling...
To get up early
Set the alarm clock, b…th…! (can be beeped)
All in unison: - And we, and we have a present for you! (As a gift an alarm clock)
5.) You came to work -
Documents - a bunch!
There is no handle, as for evil,
Well, fuck .. whose case!
All in unison: - And we, and we have a present for you! (Gift ballpoint pen)
6.) At work you are tired,
Walked to the car
Oh how it snowed
Windshield glass!
All in unison: - And we, and we have a present for you! (Snow brush included)
7.) And so that the wife waits at home,
I was dying of desire
Here's what we give you...
Though you yourself: OH-GO-GO!
All in unison: - And we, and we have a present for you! (As a gift Viagra)
8.) To calculate the premium,
Yes, do not strain your brains,
We give you a calculator
I really need an account!
All in unison: - And we, and we have a present for you! (Calculator provided)
Finally, we wish
To make all dreams come true
And the gifts came in handy
And they came to the occasion!
All in unison: - After all, with us, with us, all the gifts are just class !!! From the most from Pugacheva
Your wig is almost brand new.
Only Maxim Galkin
He asked for an apology:
He could not bring the wig,
And he sent you only a curl. (A curl from a Barbie doll.) Leps Grigory (how cute he is!)
I gave you my glasses.
True, they have disadvantages -
The fans are to blame! (Black glasses with one broken glass.) Stop! Item not for fun
The group sends you "Hands up!" (Children's gun.)
Glucose is also beneficial.
Glucose sends you glucose. (A lump of sugar or a packet of glucose.)
And the stylist Serezha Zverev
He sang himself, believing in himself.
And even though I don't know you
He sends you his solo album. (Blank CD.) They love Dima Kharatyan.
He is a man without flaw.
He is one of us -
Actor, singer, midshipman.
Do not lose courage
He gives you a sword as a keepsake!
Sorry bad luck:
There was no sword in the country,
Well, there are a lot of these skewers.
So it's even tougher! (Hands over a pack of wooden or plastic skewers for canapes.) You are neither less nor more -
Black "boomer" sends Seryoga. (Black toy car.) From the Viagra girls
Forget the gout.
Although not all of them are talented,
How extravagant!
They are not indifferent to you -
Send you an air kiss! ( Balloon, and there are imprints of lips on it.) Moiseev sends you a ring
With the words "Let's be together!" (Ring.) To look great,
Basque Kolya sends you personally
Not a hurdy-gurdy that you, no!
A much needed item. (Mirror.) So Lolita does,
If she gets stuffy.
Take a shower from mineral water,
If it gets too hot! (A bottle of mineral water.) Vinokur's hobby -
Correct your figure.
He sent you the trainer.
Tested it myself first. (Rope.) Musketeer Boyarsky Misha
He sends a hat without extra words to you.
He did not take his
I myself still need
And he gave this one -
Wife made. (Paper hat.) Well, Babkina Nadezhda
Justified all expectations!
The whole set is in front of you!
Suggested a gift Gore. (A stack and a pickle.)

Eyeliner: The French say that a real woman can make three things out of nothing: a salad, a scandal and a hat. Our (name of the hero of the day) can do much more, she can also arrange a real holiday for herself and the guests from all this. That she will now demonstrate with brilliance to all of us.
- Perhaps not all those present know that we are in constant cooperation with the great couturier of our time Zakidon Shlyapnikov and offer the hero of the day a personal all-season collection of his hats. Hats, mirror, photographer, everything ready? Then let's start!

Sport relieves us of stress
And will add health to everyone.
To stay young
Sports need to be done.
Summer, autumn, winter
Take up walking.
To overtake the bus
You have to wear a hat.

To be always healthy
Not to cough, not to sniff,
You can run for a long time in the park
Or hang on the horizontal bar.
If water is given for life,
It’s more like a river, a shower.
Just put on a hat
After all, to her face, besides.

If in household chores suddenly
It turns out that two legs and two arms are not enough,
And everything she needs to finish.

Must have a hat
To see everything, to look after everyone,
So that work is in full swing soon,
So that not a second for laziness, yawning.
(An option for the teacher. So that the student could not write off,
From someone else's notebook, "lick" everything,
He could not pull out the spur ...
This hat will fit.

The sun in the country mercilessly burns
Is there someone on all fours?
In the hottest, sultry time
Save your crown from harmful rays!
Avoid overheating
Put on your awesome hat!

If, (name of the hero of the day), you suddenly
A friend will invite you for the weekend
Don't think, don't guess
Accept the offer!
Be gentle, be cheerful
Just don't forget your hat!
Weekend hat -
Not a hat, but a legend!

We know you love animals
Squirrels, hares, capercaillie,
Save your own river
And don't kill the fish in it.
To make the trees green
For birds to sing songs
Join the Greenpeace Society
To us, "green", such -
Not like us blue!

This hat is not worn on the head, but in the hands.
If you don't want to freak out
see pyramids,
Collect capital
And you go to the station.
You can easily get a visa
And go on cruises!

The grandiose model is made in a single copy, has no analogues in the world and has the supernatural property of invisibility. Let's try ... wonderful! Trying in vain - you still won't see anything!
Give a bottle with a pacifier

Hello our long-awaited day,
We didn't come here in vain
The table is set, glasses are poured,
Maybe an October holiday?
Maybe celebrate the New Year?
Or May came here?
celebrating a birthday
Our ... half a hundred and five
Among us is a newborn
We congratulate all of her
But, and she should drink from a glass,
The idea is not given!
We will give this pacifier.
Let suck - it's time
And to us for her health
It's time for a drink!
Let it grow and not get sick,
Gathers us once a year.
If she had health
And the rest will come! Give beads from pasta
We cannot give you expensive gifts on your birthday,
Because with such and such prices We can't buy anything anywhere.
But do not think that we are not attentive, You are more precious than any gifts,
It's just that we have a wonderful day. It remains only to love you.
Although we can’t give you expensive gifts on your birthday,
But still, with great efforts, We were able to buy something.
And we want to wish you from the bottom of our hearts a Sea of ​​\u200b\u200bhappiness, health, love,
And we will give you a necklace, And we will put it on your shoulders.
You protect him from moths, frost, In him you meet the dawn and sunset,
In a hungry hour, boil it for yourself, And there is no need for huge expenses.
If sadness and sadness visit you, Disperse them with a miracle of miracles,
And sell this wonderful gift, And buy an expensive Mercedes.
***

On this gentle and affectionate evening, When relatives are already all at the table
You accept my modest gift - a three-ruble handkerchief.
(We give the hero of the day a handkerchief prepared in advance.)
I bought it in Orenburg, I care about you like a mother.
I'm ready for you, dear, Not a handkerchief - give a towel.
(We give the hero of the day a towel.)
Let everyone envy you in the hall, We will not upset the guests.
So that my gifts are not stolen, I will ask everyone to distribute napkins.
(Napkins are distributed to all present.)
Age - it's not just because the years, When in the veins of hot blood.
So let's fill the glasses For the Anniversary and faith in love!
1. Happy birthday, congratulations,
We wish you all the best.
We give technology to you
And fashionable clothes.
To quickly clean the apartment
Get a wonderful car
Very easy to handle
Our "Roventa" vacuum cleaner.
He will wipe anyone's nose,
Will take away all your chaos.
Gently in your hands you will take
You wave in different directions
Instantly dirt from all over the apartment
Scattered - no dust.
He won't take up much space.
It will fit into any slot.
saves kilowatts,
Doesn't rattle and is lightweight.
Everything in the house will shine
Nowhere to fly dust. (broom)

In life, he is the best assistant,
With him, grief is not a problem.
He will always help you.
And the name is sonorous
Enema - scientifically.
It is not difficult to apply
We will include instructions. (enema)
Use it every day
And your migraine will go away
He will remove all the slags from you
The body will look slender.
Basically, we tell you
He cannot be replaced in life.
With extensive angina
You can gargle your throat
When renovating an apartment
You can spray paint.
Being with him at the dacha
You spray the bushes
And then how crazy
Flowers will bloom everywhere.
I think you've made sure
What a miracle we give you
And now boldly through life
You will go with him.
3. As for the outfit
You quickly put it on
You will be a gorgeous woman in it
And Madonna is just a shadow.
Winter panties on wadding
Fit perfectly
Because in November
The cold is fierce in the yard.
Hurry up put it on
Make men laugh.
It's not that hard to warm up together
And it's impossible to freeze
Wearing hot pants
You will live any cold. (diapers)
4. And boots from Versace
The last peep is not otherwise.
All their winter you carry
And you won't get cold feet. (slippers, socks, shoe covers)
Emphasize your figure
I broke my long leg.
Klavka Slate would herself
I would go crazy with it.
In a headset with panties
It will be hot like in the Sahara
You carry gifts
And bless fate.
There will be a reason to drink
We will gather again
Happiness of women without end.
We wish you Happy Birthday. Taz gift.
For the anniversary, we give a basin, it will always be just right.
You can wash the floors in it, you can milk the cows,
You can pick berries, burp after being drunk,
You can wash with him in the baths, he will come in handy there,
You can wash clothes in it, you can wash your ass,
You can sow flour in it and hang it on a bitch
You can ride down the hill, it will always come in handy,
And how will it be (50.60...) we will come to you again,
Prepare okroshka for us, but find a bigger spoon,
We will pour okroshka into a basin, and we will celebrate the anniversary,
In general, you keep it, do not break it, do not crush it,
Do not leave it in the yard and put it away,
Congratulations on your anniversary, we want to drink everything now,
Who is from the pile, who is from what, and we will drink from it. Comic gift (hell).
In order not to be wise for a long time,
I decided to give
Precious Potion Root
For soul and health
"Horseradish - oops", "horseradish ponadol",
always put the hell on the table.
To forget our problems
Put horseradish in soup and porridge.
If a mondrazh torments you,
Horseradish on bread and roll smear.
And so that there are no problems
Fuck all things.
It has every vitamin
Will add vigor, strength.
To work until dawn
Fuck your head.
He is a balm from a beatner -
And if they come up
You can send everyone to hell! Money as a gift.

We planned to give you a service - cheap and nice.
Then they thought, guessed the microwave oven chose ...
Then a food processor for a great design.
And then they decided, no, she's 55 years old, let her go on a cruise where she likes.
We would be happy to send her to Turkey or the Emirates, let her walk in the open, only the sea needs money.
But here we secured ourselves, contacted the fabulous Gene, asked for his help, and now we received the package.
We don’t know what he sent here, we open the package in front of everyone.
Oh, what a miracle it is, how beautiful the pattern of the carpet is, let it please our hero of the day from evening to morning.
You can lie on it, dream about cruises or throw it over your shoulders, it will warm your soul.
And if you take a camera, you won’t find better nature, against the background of this carpet, you can shoot until the morning.
Guests will run to you - can't we lie down on it?
What can I say, beautiful!
We give you this exclusive.
Only the moth so as not to eat, we will sprinkle it quickly,

Although you already [and not] fifty dollars,
Still a joy for friends -
Birthday, anniversary!
After all, any of the birthdays -
It's also a reason to donate.
Because - see for yourself! -
We have come here with gifts.
Birthday boy, dear!
We are here for you with all our heart!
But first, pour it.
Get drunk, respect people!
No, we don't need alcohol
We would like such a drink
Just to clear your throat!
And we'll give you
Everything we took with us.
It's still a lot of work...
After all, there are a lot of gifts!
Dear hero of the day
We are generously pleased to give.
And without asking for a reward
Let's get started. Is everyone ready?
We are for a dear friend
Haven't regretted anything
Barely dragged.
(At these words, they take out a large box in which all the prepared gifts are stacked, and they begin to take out each item from it one by one and read cool poems about each gift)

Gift number 1.
Look here:
It says "WATER".
And although there is no water,
Let's highlight this point:
After all, the bottle, even if empty,
But what a beautiful one!
Suitable for everything at once.
Well, first of all, it's a vase.
Secondly, the dishes are
And not only for the bouquet:
For water and compote,
And for tea with bergamot.
(in these words they present an empty water bottle - plastic)
Gift number 2.
Here's another hello:
Pack of cigarettes.
And "hello" - from childhood he:
Do you remember - summer, the stadium ...
Hundred meters on physical...
Sitting in the yard...
Cigarettes were also
Will you still deny it?
Even if you don't smoke for a long time
We give a pack anyway.
It only takes a glance
To understand: smoking is poison!
And why, you ask, a pack? -
You will hide a stash in it!

Gift number 3.
Look how beautiful
This beer can!
You can make a rattle
Very nice toy
Throw some coins in there!
What is not the joy of the hero of the day?
Rattle - isn't it?
And a coin box.

Gift number 4.
Here's another present for you
Under the name Eurocent,
If simply - a penny
Made from excellent stainless steel.
For what? So it's not a secret:
From donated coins
Happy birthday!
We will not take the present back!
It's money, and besides,
Our modest contribution to this dinner.

Gift No. 5
Here's another surprise
Not a whim, not a whim:
This is a candy wrapper.
And why, you ask, is this?
We want to infect with an example:
Become a collector!
This is the first copy.
Do you understand, jubilee?
Who buys paintings
Who collects coins...
Fanfiction is more reliable though:
After all, paintings are more expensive!
And, giving candy to friends,
Remove fanfiction at the same time.

Gift No. 6
And from refractory steel
We give you a pin.
You ask: why all of a sudden?
For gum! Got it, friend?
You might say, “What is it?
After all, now the underwear is different -
From "Trussardi", from "Dior" ... "-
What kind of conversation?
But take it, do not torture your friends,
Just like that - just in case!

Gift No. 7
Look here mate:
It's a matchbox!
You say, little thing? No not like this:
It's not empty at all.
Even if you are not a tourist,
Not an avid climber
But from now on you can
Light a fire in your soul!

Gift No. 8
We are happy to give you
This tube of lipstick.
And although it is completely empty,
But beautiful female lips
He keeps touch.
Hey tube! A feast for the eyes!
And I can give advice:
Throw it in the enemy's pocket!
Revenge him in full
For you his wife!

Gift number 9.
Look what a beauty:
At least while the jaw is in place,
Behind the teeth - an eye for an eye!
We give... Now, now...
(rummaging through the box)
The hero of the day is ready to accept
This dental floss?
Oops, looks like they screwed up...
But we hardly repent -
The thread is simple, ordinary
Somehow act more habitually.
And they made a mistake - it does not matter:
They will always come in handy!

Gift number 10.
And now seriously
We will solve the "dental problem".
This is pasta. Yes, a tooth!
Such a fragrant one!
We know, we've tried...
True, we doubt gnaws:
Is it worth giving?
Because buy a new one
We didn't make it today.
But we will give - in fact!

Gift number 11.
We give you a cup! Yes friends?
Look - it's yours!
Know you were looking for her at home?
We see - the cup is familiar.
What for? The answer here is simple:
There will be a wonderful toast -
Well, and you, as usual.
From the dishes drink the usual!
And imagine that you are drinking tea:
Don't get drunk and don't be bored!
Have a Pepsi if it's hot.
Is it better to drink from a gift?

Gift number 12.
All gifts are over.
But no: an envelope without a stamp!
The reason will be suddenly what
And the envelope is at hand!
Even a letter, but even a note -
After all, the path to the post office is not close!
However, it is better not to pull
And look at the envelope!

And now it's time for all of us
Rang a friendly "cheers"!
(all guests pick up and honor the hero of the occasion many times)
[If the gift is not money, but something else, the donors will have to describe the gift in verse]

We are here today for a reason
Gathered together, friends!
Everywhere jokes, congratulations,
Birthday wishes.
birthday girl just
Let's congratulate now!
Come on, guests, join
And scream with all your might
Like someone's got you for something
Bitten very hard.
Tanya got up early today
So that she would not be in a hurry.
Start before it's too late
Get yourself in order.
Tanya comes to a white bath,
To wash your head
And shampoo - well, not a drop.
What to do, how to be here?
Guests in chorus: -
So tired of dressing up
I began to make my way to the kitchen,
To drink coffee
Strength to restore.
But yesterday a neighbor came
And today there is no coffee.
Guests in chorus: "And we, and we have a present for you"-
We know Tanya has a sweet tooth,
She loves sweets.
She didn't eat candy day
And already upset.
Guests in chorus: "And we, and we have a present for you"- (gives candy).
So Tanya began to cook,
Got the best meat.
What to pepper the dish with
So as not to upset the guests?
Guests in chorus: "And we, and we have a present for you"- (Handing a bag of pepper)
Finally dinner is ready:
One hundred salads, cake and pilaf.
Here are all the dishes on the table,
Only salt mistress, where?
Guests in chorus: "And we, and we have a present for you"- (handed .... a bag of salt)
Here comes the last guest
And a whole load of dishes.
What to do here, how to wash,
Where can I get a sponge?
Guests in chorus: "And we, and we have a present for you"- (give .... a sponge)
Don't take it as an insult
This joke is congratulations.
Smile, sing songs

1. Happy birthday, congratulations,
We wish you all the best.
We give technology to you
And fashionable clothes.
To quickly clean the apartment
Get a wonderful car
Very easy to handle
Our "Roventa" vacuum cleaner.
He will wipe anyone's nose,
Will take away all your chaos.
Gently in your hands you will take
You wave in different directions
Instantly dirt from all over the apartment
Scattered - no dust.
He won't take up much space.
It will fit into any slot.
saves kilowatts,
Doesn't rattle and is lightweight.
Everything in the house will shine
There is nowhere for dust to fly (give a broom)
2. Here is the device "Just in case",
In life, he is the best assistant,
With him, grief is not a problem.
He will always help you.
And the name is sonorous
Enema - scientifically.
It is not difficult to apply
We will attach the instructions (they give an enema).
Use it every day
And your migraine will go away
He will remove all the slags from you
The body will look slender.
In general, we tell you
He is irreplaceable in life.
With extensive angina
You can gargle your throat
When renovating an apartment
You can spray paint.
Being with him at the dacha
You spray the bushes.
And then how crazy
Flowers will bloom everywhere.
I think you've made sure
What a miracle we give you
And now boldly through life
You will go with her.
3. As for the outfit
You quickly put it on
You will be a gorgeous woman in it
And Madonna is just a shadow.
Winter panties on wadding
Fit perfectly
Because in November
The cold is fierce in the yard.
Put it on quickly
Make men laugh.
It's not that hard to warm up together
And you can't freeze
Wearing hot pants
You will live through any cold (diapers are given).
4. And boots from Versace
The last peep is not otherwise.
All their winter you carry
And you won’t get frostbite on your feet (they give slippers or socks or shoe covers)
Emphasize your figure
I broke my long leg.
Klavka Slate would herself
I would go crazy with envy.
In a headset with panties
It will be hot like in the Sahara
You carry gifts
And bless fate.
There will be a reason to drink
We will gather again
Happiness of women without end.
We wish you Happy Birthday.
1. If the stomach wants to eat, do him honor:
You spread pate on bread, there is nothing tastier (they give a jar of pate).
2. If you like delicious soup, boil some cereals,
Throw a sardine in here, maybe even half (they give a can of sardines).
3. If you need lunch, there is no problem here:
Your millet will be delicious, if there is stew. (give stew).
4. Pour tea into cups, serve loaf!
Let the children laugh loudly, if there is condensed milk. (give condensed milk)
5. If you call solid cream to the dacha of society,
Do not rely on potatoes, open olives soon (they give olives)
6. If you haven't bought bread, don't be sad, it's nonsense!
Open a jar of beans, you will always be full! (gives beans)
7. So that the picnic does not become a burden, so that they eat heartily,
open a jar of corn and lettuce feed! (gives corn)
8. Offering guests a snack, the same sandwich:
Put a cucumber on the bread, and a couple of sprats from the jar (they give a cucumber and sprats)
9. Unsuccessful fishing will be made pleasant,
Fish meatballs, in tomato gravy (meatballs are given)
10. If he grew up in the garden, then we will not give you back,
This jar of peas, we'll eat it in the winter! (give peas)
11. In addition to the treat, zucchini caviar!
There are a lot of vitamins, you should always eat it! (give zucchini caviar)
12. The sun is hot this summer. Even if there are many berries
Decorates our picnic, fruits are a gift to you from the south
We give at this moment (give fruit)
13. If you are too lazy to cook, but your stomach howled,
Porridge with meat will come in handy to moderate his ardor! (give porridge with meat)
14. A useless little thing, if you take it alone,

1. Frankly show - the beauty of the face and your body - and you will see in it what you did not want to see in it (give a mirror)
2. Your iron girlfriends, long-legged, long-armed - they keep their hair perfectly, and you look so crowned! (give hairpins)
3. They will cut everything, cut it and put it in order. - on the big number "five", the manicure will shine! (give manicure scissors)
4. You can’t find better girlfriends - and don’t go to a fortuneteller - at least twist it, don’t twist it, everyone needs it very much ... (give curlers)
5. Gently removes makeup, makes a light massage - and at any moment our good friend will help - soft ... (give a sponge)
6. Always take them with you so that they are at hand, their labors are invisible. And if there is no water nearby, they are so important, these ..... (give wet wipes)
7. He is many hundreds of years old, but he looks fresh, we keep the most irreplaceable item at hand. Like the winds of a pure stream - thin ... (give a handkerchief)
8. Like a whole battalion of soldiers, they stand in a box - they will remove extra touches, and cosmetics are sins (they give cotton buds)
9. There is just nothing in it: shadows, a pencil, tweezers, hairpins, mascara, a comb, varnishes, and there is also all sorts of rubbish. A very necessary little thing - for the hostess ... (give a cosmetic bag)
10. It happens plastic and gold, iron, silver and bone - he holds the hair with a strong hand, behind him they are like behind a Chinese wall. He helped every woman at least once - such an irreplaceable ... (rim)

Perhaps you "lathered" to run away,
But your lot is to continue the work! (gives soap)
Who gets a can of beer
Live happily all year! (gives beer)
Eat bananas and coconuts
And expect rewards from fate! (give banana)
While the boss is "removing shavings" from us,
Quietly make a cup of tea! (gives a mug)
Get this tube as a gift,
To make every tooth shine in the sun! (gives toothpaste)
Since you got chocolate,
Then you will not be bitter - it will be sweet! (gives chocolate)
When you drink cranberry jelly,
Forget the mundane carousel!
Let the world, as they say, wait!
And you will be healthy all year round (give jelly)
Although this cream is inedible,
But the smell is just amazing! (gives hand cream)
To the one who receives this candle,
You have to travel the world! (gives a candle)
To write down where the pay went,
You will really need this pen! (give a pen)
We'll have to live, the work of grief,
And forget about the days of the calendar! (give a calendar)
And great love is waiting for you
And kisses all year round! (give a set of sponges)
Do you understand what the purpose of the gift is?
Life will be joyful and bright! (Give markers)
And you are "in juice", in the prime of life!
Among your friends you have no equal! (gives a bag of juice)
You are well versed in work
And you will be held in high esteem with us all year (give a horseshoe)
Walking with a haircut will be beautiful,
Captivating everyone with a thick, fluffy mane (give shampoo)
You will be cheerful and energetic

Though not 25 years old, vigorous mother,
We send you, my dear, a parcel for your birthday.
A little bit here, a little bit here, don't blame me.
If there is no CANDLE in the house, here it is, if the light goes out.
MATCHES and a PIECE OF SOAP so that you wash your face,
And here is a PACK OF CIGARETTES, suddenly you smoke, maybe not.
We have life, you’ll understand, you’ll smoke and drink here.
Here is a PIVASIK for order after the bath, al with the use.
We all blow it ourselves and recommend it to you.
SALA here is a piece 3, so eat or cook,
Stretch until summer, now it's a jewel.
Yes, look, do not get fat, it is better to feed the guests.
Let your foolish friends eat
Kohl do not feel sorry for them figure.
A BOTTLE OF HOLY WATER, drop by drop into the mouth before meals.
So as not to give to anyone, say: "Itself, they say, is not enough."
And the back suddenly hurts, rub it and hold it.
If you get sick, lie down, period, there is a grandson and a son-in-law and a daughter.
Let them wash and wash themselves, let them not disturb their mother.
As soon as you receive the package, take the bottle as soon as possible,
And write the answer as soon as possible, what you like, what you don't.
If there is no money in the house, tie a BROOM to your leg,
You need to wave a broom, collect money in a pile.
That's all goodbye girl, you are for us, well, like a sister,
“How did we decide what to give!?”

First:
Grandmothers told us yesterday
As if they heard
What is your anniversary here,
Here we come quickly.
Second:
For a long time they could not decide
What to buy as a gift.
The list is long written
And then we both decided.
First:
The steamboat is of no use to you,
Crossed out because.
We put a cross on the locomotive:
Takes up a lot of space.
Second:
The tank will not enter your garage,
The plane won't get in there.
The economy does not need a rocket,
We didn't take her for it.
First:
Kamaz big - rejected,
We removed the tractor from the list,
Submarine .... the lake will spoil,
Helicopter, but where is he going to land!?
Second:
You can donate a car
But this is hard to please.
Giving a bike is no good
And the scooter is quite a shame.
First:
It turns out that with transport - a complete bummer,
Let's move on to something else.
The robbers will remove the necklace of diamonds,
A wallet with money in the market will be taken away,
Second:
You could buy a bag for groceries,
But they figured out in their mind the composition of the whole family,
And it turned out the size of a suitcase,
And this bag is not for ladies at all.
First:
We are at a dead end with this problem,
Faced with a difficult dilemma:
We wanted the mechanism, but the dimensions are not the same
A small gift does not fit the dream.
Second:
It suddenly dawned on us: here is what you need,
You will cook dinner for everyone,
Everyone will eat, and immediately praise you ...
"Fruit cocktail".
(For this unusual congratulations necessary: ​​lay out the ingredients on a tray ... .., as well as a large glass where we throw everything ...., then when poured with champagne a large ladle is distributed to women in glasses)

Women themselves are like a basket of fruits.
Take, for example, the beautiful ________
Lips - raspberries, like persiklanita ...
Sweet, fresh, tender _______!
I'll brag to you: ______ breasts
Like appetizing ripe melons,
Lady's fingers ... This is a secret!
A woman, in general, a walking dessert!
Fruit language - little known
And sometimes they don't understand
That, having tasted a delicious fruit,
Seduction will come.
We are for _______ today
Made a cocktail
To make _________ more beautiful
And beautiful as a model!
Put a lot of fruit
To taste this dessert
Our _________ shone,
And she was the most beautiful!
Here is a piece of apple, here is a piece of pear
Ridiculousness and coquetry will be,
If you eat these fruits!
Here's a sweet banana
Ripe, groovy,
If you want to be happy
Take it with you.
Ripe, juicy orange -
Fruit contains the first vitamin.
To always be healthy
Eat slices without shame.
So that in life _____________
Ball of peace and harmony
We put grapes in the cocktail!
To make life more glamorous and more beautiful

Comic birthday gifts with poems for a woman

Photoshoot of the hero of the day in hats.
This is a very funny congratulatory number for a women's anniversary, which is more suitable for a home holiday or a holiday in the country, so that the culprit is not upset because she can ruin her hair (after all, she needs to try on each hat, show it to guests and, if desired, in each as a keepsake take a picture)
Eyeliner: The French say that a real woman can make three things out of nothing: a salad, a scandal and a hat. Our (name of the hero of the day) can do much more, she can also arrange a real holiday for herself and the guests from all this. That she will now demonstrate with brilliance to all of us.
- Perhaps not all those present know that we are in constant cooperation with the great couturier of our time Zakidon Shlyapnikov and offer the hero of the day a personal all-season collection of his hats. Hats, mirror, photographer, everything ready? Then let's start!
First model: cap for sports "Champion" (Children's cap with a toe or baseball cap.)
Sport relieves us of stress
And will add health to everyone.
To stay young
Sports need to be done.
Summer, autumn, winter
Take up walking.
To overtake the bus
You have to wear a hat.
Model 2: Swimming cap "Dive" (Rubber swimming cap or shower cap)
To be always healthy
Not to cough, not to sniff,
You can run for a long time in the park
Or hang on the horizontal bar.
If water is given for life,
It’s more like a river, a shower.
Just put on a hat
After all, to her face, besides.
The third model: hat of the hostess "Clean" (From a sponge or washcloth)
If in household chores suddenly
It turns out that two legs and two arms are not enough,
And everything she needs to finish.
Fourth model: a hat for work “All-seeing” (An option for a teacher is to sew glasses on four sides on a hat.)
Must have a hat
To see everything, to look after everyone,
So that work is in full swing soon,
So that not a second for laziness, yawning.
(An option for the teacher. So that the student could not write off,
From someone else's notebook, "lick" everything,
He could not pull out the spur ...
This hat will fit.
Fifth model: miracle hat "In the garden, in the garden" (Old straw hat)
The sun in the country mercilessly burns
Is there someone on all fours?
In the hottest, sultry time
Save your crown from harmful rays!
Avoid overheating
Put on your awesome hat!
Model 6: Legend Weekend Hat (Any original hat)
If, (name of the hero of the day), you suddenly
A friend will invite you for the weekend
Don't think, don't guess
Accept the offer!
Be gentle, be cheerful
Just don't forget your hat!
Weekend hat -
Not a hat, but a legend!
Model 7: Eco-hat for conservationists (Spotted khaki hat)
We know you love animals
Squirrels, hares, capercaillie,
Save your own river
And don't kill the fish in it.
To make the trees green
For birds to sing songs
Join the Greenpeace Society
To us, "green", such -
Not like us blue!
Model Eight: Cruise Visa Hat (Old Men's Hat)
This hat is not worn on the head, but in the hands.
If you don't want to freak out
see pyramids,
Collect capital
And you go to the station.
You can easily get a visa
And go on cruises!
And, finally, the ninth model: an invisibility hat (A large hat that crawls over the eyes, or a knitted hat).
The grandiose model is made in a single copy, has no analogues in the world and has the supernatural property of invisibility. Let's try ... wonderful! Trying in vain - you still won't see anything!
This collection of hats is designed for all occasions and will help you feel like a real woman in any situation. Give a bottle with a pacifier
(for fun, we put the pacifier on a check)
Hello our long-awaited day,
We didn't come here in vain
The table is set, glasses are poured,
Maybe an October holiday?
Maybe celebrate the New Year?
Or May came here?
celebrating a birthday
Our ... half a hundred and five
Among us is a newborn
We congratulate all of her
But, and she should drink from a glass,
The idea is not given!
We will give this pacifier.
Let suck - it's time
And to us for her health
It's time for a drink!
Let it grow and not get sick,
Gathers us once a year.
If she had health
And the rest will come! Give beads from pasta
We cannot give you expensive gifts on your birthday,
Because with such and such prices We can't buy anything anywhere.
But do not think that we are not attentive, You are more precious than any gifts,
It's just that we have a wonderful day. It remains only to love you.
Although we can’t give you expensive gifts on your birthday,
But still, with great efforts, We were able to buy something.
And we want to wish you from the bottom of our hearts a Sea of ​​\u200b\u200bhappiness, health, love,
And we will give you a necklace, And we will put it on your shoulders.
You protect him from moths, frost, In him you meet the dawn and sunset,
In a hungry hour, boil it for yourself, And there is no need for huge expenses.
If sadness and sadness visit you, Disperse them with a miracle of miracles,
And sell this wonderful gift, And buy an expensive Mercedes.
***
(To the motive of the song "Orenburg downy shawl")
On this gentle and affectionate evening, When relatives are already all at the table
You accept my modest gift - a three-ruble handkerchief.
(We give the hero of the day a handkerchief prepared in advance.)
I bought it in Orenburg, I care about you like a mother.
I'm ready for you, dear, Not a handkerchief - give a towel.
(We give the hero of the day a towel.)
Let everyone envy you in the hall, We will not upset the guests.
So that my gifts are not stolen, I will ask everyone to distribute napkins.
(Napkins are distributed to all present.)
Age - it's not just because the years, When in the veins of hot blood.
So let's fill the glasses For the Anniversary and faith in love! Unusual congratulations with gifts
1. Happy birthday, congratulations,
We wish you all the best.
We give technology to you
And fashionable clothes.
To quickly clean the apartment
Get a wonderful car
Very easy to handle
Our "Roventa" vacuum cleaner.
He will wipe anyone's nose,
Will take away all your chaos.
Gently in your hands you will take
You wave in different directions
Instantly dirt from all over the apartment
Scattered - no dust.
He won't take up much space.
It will fit into any slot.
saves kilowatts,
Doesn't rattle and is lightweight.
Everything in the house will shine
Nowhere to fly dust. (broom)
2. Here is the “Just in case” device
In life, he is the best assistant,
With him, grief is not a problem.
He will always help you.
And the name is sonorous
Enema - scientifically.
It is not difficult to apply
We will include instructions. (enema)
Use it every day
And your migraine will go away
He will remove all the slags from you
The body will look slender.
Basically, we tell you
He cannot be replaced in life.
With extensive angina
You can gargle your throat
When renovating an apartment
You can spray paint.
Being with him at the dacha
You spray the bushes
And then how crazy
Flowers will bloom everywhere.
I think you've made sure
What a miracle we give you
And now boldly through life
You will go with him.
3. As for the outfit
You quickly put it on
You will be a gorgeous woman in it
And Madonna is just a shadow.
Winter panties on wadding
Fit perfectly
Because in November
The cold is fierce in the yard.
Hurry up put it on
Make men laugh.
It's not that hard to warm up together
And it's impossible to freeze
Wearing hot pants
You will live any cold. (diapers)
4. And boots from Versace
The last peep is not otherwise.
All their winter you carry
And you won't get cold feet. (slippers, socks, shoe covers)
Emphasize your figure
I broke my long leg.
Klavka Slate would herself
I would go crazy with it.
In a headset with panties
It will be hot like in the Sahara
You carry gifts
And bless fate.
There will be a reason to drink
We will gather again
Happiness of women without end.
We wish you Happy Birthday. Taz gift.
For the anniversary, we give a basin, it will always be just right.
You can wash the floors in it, you can milk the cows,
You can pick berries, burp after being drunk,
You can wash with him in the baths, he will come in handy there,
You can wash clothes in it, you can wash your ass,
You can sow flour in it and hang it on a bitch
You can ride down the hill, it will always come in handy,
And how will it be (50.60...) we will come to you again,
Prepare okroshka for us, but find a bigger spoon,
We will pour okroshka into a basin, and we will celebrate the anniversary,
In general, you keep it, do not break it, do not crush it,
Do not leave it in the yard and put it away,
Congratulations on your anniversary, we want to drink everything now,
Who is from the pile, who is from what, and we will drink from it. Comic gift (hell).
In order not to be wise for a long time,
I decided to give
Precious Potion Root
For soul and health
"Horseradish - oops", "horseradish ponadol",
always put the hell on the table.
To forget our problems
Put horseradish in soup and porridge.
If a mondrazh torments you,
Horseradish on bread and roll smear.
And so that there are no problems
Fuck all things.
It has every vitamin
Will add vigor, strength.
To work until dawn
Fuck your head.
He is a balm from a beatner -
And if they come up
You can send everyone to hell! Money as a gift.
Money can be alternated: real and those that are sold in kiosks - fake money /. The text is as follows:
We planned to give you a service - cheap and nice.
Then they thought, guessed the microwave oven chose ...
Then a food processor for a great design.
And then they decided, no, she's 55 years old, let her go on a cruise where she likes.
We would be happy to send her to Turkey or the Emirates, let her walk in the open, only the sea needs money.
But here we secured ourselves, contacted the fabulous Gene, asked for his help, and now we received the package.
We don’t know what he sent here, we open the package in front of everyone.
Oh, what a miracle it is, how beautiful the pattern of the carpet is, let it please our hero of the day from evening to morning.
You can lie on it, dream about cruises or throw it over your shoulders, it will warm your soul.
And if you take a camera, you won’t find better nature, against the background of this carpet, you can shoot until the morning.
Guests will run to you - can't we lie down on it?
What can I say, beautiful!
We give you this exclusive.
Only the moth so as not to eat, we will sprinkle it quickly,
hero of the day, rather pour a glass for a gift to us! Our dear birthday boy!
Although you already [and not] fifty dollars,
Still a joy for friends -
Birthday, anniversary!
After all, any of the birthdays -
It's also a reason to donate.
Because - see for yourself! -
We have come here with gifts.
Birthday boy, dear!
We are here for you with all our heart!
But first, pour it.
Get drunk, respect people!
No, we don't need alcohol
We would like such a drink
Just to clear your throat!
And we'll give you
Everything we took with us.
It's still a lot of work...
After all, there are a lot of gifts!
Dear hero of the day
We are generously pleased to give.
And without asking for a reward
Let's get started. Is everyone ready?
We are for a dear friend
Haven't regretted anything
Barely dragged.
(At these words, they take out a large box in which all the prepared gifts are stacked, and they begin to take out each item from it one by one and read cool poems about each gift)

Gift number 1.
Look here:
It says "WATER".
And although there is no water,
Let's highlight this point:
After all, the bottle, even if empty,
But what a beautiful one!
Suitable for everything at once.
Well, first of all, it's a vase.
Secondly, the dishes are
And not only for the bouquet:
For water and compote,
And for tea with bergamot.
(in these words they present an empty water bottle - plastic)
Gift number 2.
Here's another hello:
Pack of cigarettes.
And "hello" - from childhood he:
Do you remember - summer, the stadium ...
Hundred meters on physical...
Sitting in the yard...
Cigarettes were also
Will you still deny it?
Even if you don't smoke for a long time
We give a pack anyway.
It only takes a glance
To understand: smoking is poison!
And why, you ask, a pack? -
You will hide a stash in it!
(in these words they present a pack of cigarettes - preferably empty)
Gift number 3.
Look how beautiful
This beer can!
You can make a rattle
Very nice toy
Throw some coins in there!
What is not the joy of the hero of the day?
Rattle - isn't it?
And a coin box.
(in these words they present an empty beer can)
Gift number 4.
Here's another present for you
Under the name Eurocent,
If simply - a penny
Made from excellent stainless steel.
For what? So it's not a secret:
From donated coins
Happy birthday!
We will not take the present back!
It's money, and besides,
Our modest contribution to this dinner.
(they present a coin and throw it into the already donated beer can)
Gift No. 5
Here's another surprise
Not a whim, not a whim:
This is a candy wrapper.
And why, you ask, is this?
We want to infect with an example:
Become a collector!
This is the first copy.
Do you understand, jubilee?
Who buys paintings
Who collects coins...
Fanfiction is more reliable though:
After all, paintings are more expensive!
And, giving candy to friends,
Remove fanfiction at the same time.
(at this place they present a candy wrapper)
Gift No. 6
And from refractory steel
We give you a pin.
You ask: why all of a sudden?
For gum! Got it, friend?
You might say, “What is it?
After all, now the underwear is different -
From "Trussardi", from "Dior" ... "-
What kind of conversation?
But take it, do not torture your friends,
Just like that - just in case!
(on these words they present an ordinary steel pin)
Gift No. 7
Look here mate:
It's a matchbox!
You say, little thing? No not like this:
It's not empty at all.
Even if you are not a tourist,
Not an avid climber
But from now on you can
Light a fire in your soul!
(in these words they present a box of matches)
Gift No. 8
We are happy to give you
This tube of lipstick.
And although it is completely empty,
But beautiful female lips
He keeps touch.
Hey tube! A feast for the eyes!
And I can give advice:
Throw it in the enemy's pocket!
Revenge him in full
For you his wife!
(an empty tube of lipstick is presented at this place)
Gift number 9.
Look what a beauty:
At least while the jaw is in place,
Behind the teeth - an eye for an eye!
We give... Now, now...
(rummaging through the box)
The hero of the day is ready to accept
This dental floss?
Oops, looks like they screwed up...
But we hardly repent -
The thread is simple, ordinary
Somehow act more habitually.
And they made a mistake - it does not matter:
They will always come in handy!
(in these words they present a spool of ordinary thread, maybe not a new one)
Gift number 10.
And now seriously
We will solve the "dental problem".
This is pasta. Yes, a tooth!
Such a fragrant one!
We know, we've tried...
True, we doubt gnaws:
Is it worth giving?
Because buy a new one
We didn't make it today.
But we will give - in fact!
(in these words they present a tube of toothpaste - in accordance with the text, in this case, it is the used tube of toothpaste that should be taken)
Gift number 11.
We give you a cup! Yes friends?
Look - it's yours!
Know you were looking for her at home?
We see - the cup is familiar.
What for? The answer here is simple:
There will be a wonderful toast -
Well, and you, as usual.
From the dishes drink the usual!
And imagine that you are drinking tea:
Don't get drunk and don't be bored!
Have a Pepsi if it's hot.
Is it better to drink from a gift?
(on these words a cup belonging to the birthday man is presented)
Gift number 12.
All gifts are over.
But no: an envelope without a stamp!
The reason will be suddenly what
And the envelope is at hand!
Even a letter, but even a note -
After all, the path to the post office is not close!
However, it is better not to pull
And look at the envelope!
(in these words they present an envelope with money prepared as a gift)
And now it's time for all of us
Rang a friendly "cheers"!
(all guests pick up and honor the hero of the occasion many times)
[If the gift is not money, but something else, the donors will have to describe the gift in verse] This is a fun table chant for the anniversary with the presentation of various gifts. After the words of the host, the guests should shout in unison:
"And we, and we have a present for you!"
We are here today for a reason
Gathered together, friends!
Everywhere jokes, congratulations,
Birthday wishes.
birthday girl just
Let's congratulate now!
Come on, guests, join
And scream with all your might
Like someone's got you for something
Bitten very hard.
Tanya got up early today
So that she would not be in a hurry.
Start before it's too late
Get yourself in order.
Tanya comes to a white bath,
To wash your head
And shampoo - well, not a drop.
What to do, how to be here?
Guests in chorus: "And we, and we have a present for you"- (pulls shampoo out of the box).
So tired of dressing up
I began to make my way to the kitchen,
To drink coffee
Strength to restore.
But yesterday a neighbor came
And today there is no coffee.
Guests in chorus: "And we, and we have a present for you"- (pulls a bag of coffee out of the box).
We know Tanya has a sweet tooth,
She loves sweets.
She didn't eat candy day
And already upset.
Guests in chorus: "And we, and we have a present for you"- (gives candy).
So Tanya began to cook,
Got the best meat.
What to pepper the dish with
So as not to upset the guests?
Guests in chorus: "And we, and we have a present for you"- (Handing a bag of pepper)
Finally dinner is ready:
One hundred salads, cake and pilaf.
Here are all the dishes on the table,
Only salt mistress, where?
Guests in chorus: "And we, and we have a present for you"- (handed .... a bag of salt)
Here comes the last guest
And a whole load of dishes.
What to do here, how to wash,
Where can I get a sponge?
Guests in chorus: "And we, and we have a present for you"- (give .... a sponge)
Don't take it as an insult
This joke is congratulations.
Smile, sing songs
Know that your friends are always with you! Comic congratulations with gifts for a woman from friends.
1. Happy birthday, congratulations,
We wish you all the best.
We give technology to you
And fashionable clothes.
To quickly clean the apartment
Get a wonderful car
Very easy to handle
Our "Roventa" vacuum cleaner.
He will wipe anyone's nose,
Will take away all your chaos.
Gently in your hands you will take
You wave in different directions
Instantly dirt from all over the apartment
Scattered - no dust.
He won't take up much space.
It will fit into any slot.
saves kilowatts,
Doesn't rattle and is lightweight.
Everything in the house will shine
There is nowhere for dust to fly (give a broom)
2. Here is the device "Just in case",
In life, he is the best assistant,
With him, grief is not a problem.
He will always help you.
And the name is sonorous
Enema - scientifically.
It is not difficult to apply
We will attach the instructions (they give an enema).
Use it every day
And your migraine will go away
He will remove all the slags from you
The body will look slender.
In general, we tell you
He is irreplaceable in life.
With extensive angina
You can gargle your throat
When renovating an apartment
You can spray paint.
Being with him at the dacha
You spray the bushes.
And then how crazy
Flowers will bloom everywhere.
I think you've made sure
What a miracle we give you
And now boldly through life
You will go with her.
3. As for the outfit
You quickly put it on
You will be a gorgeous woman in it
And Madonna is just a shadow.
Winter panties on wadding
Fit perfectly
Because in November
The cold is fierce in the yard.
Put it on quickly
Make men laugh.
It's not that hard to warm up together
And you can't freeze
Wearing hot pants
You will live through any cold (diapers are given).
4. And boots from Versace
The last peep is not otherwise.
All their winter you carry
And you won’t get frostbite on your feet (they give slippers or socks or shoe covers)
Emphasize your figure
I broke my long leg.
Klavka Slate would herself
I would go crazy with envy.
In a headset with panties
It will be hot like in the Sahara
You carry gifts
And bless fate.
There will be a reason to drink
We will gather again
Happiness of women without end.
We wish you Happy Birthday. Cool congratulations from girlfriends with gifts "Country treats".
1. If the stomach wants to eat, do him honor:
You spread pate on bread, there is nothing tastier (they give a jar of pate).
2. If you like delicious soup, boil some cereals,
Throw a sardine in here, maybe even half (they give a can of sardines).
3. If you need lunch, there is no problem here:
Your millet will be delicious, if there is stew. (give stew).
4. Pour tea into cups, serve loaf!
Let the children laugh loudly, if there is condensed milk. (give condensed milk)
5. If you call solid cream to the dacha of society,
Do not rely on potatoes, open olives soon (they give olives)
6. If you haven't bought bread, don't be sad, it's nonsense!
Open a jar of beans, you will always be full! (gives beans)
7. So that the picnic does not become a burden, so that they eat heartily,
open a jar of corn and lettuce feed! (gives corn)
8. Offering guests a snack, the same sandwich:
Put a cucumber on the bread, and a couple of sprats from the jar (they give a cucumber and sprats)
9. Unsuccessful fishing will be made pleasant,
Fish meatballs, in tomato gravy (meatballs are given)
10. If he grew up in the garden, then we will not give you back,
This jar of peas, we'll eat it in the winter! (give peas)
11. In addition to the treat, zucchini caviar!
There are a lot of vitamins, you should always eat it! (give zucchini caviar)
12. The sun is hot this summer. Even if there are many berries
Decorates our picnic, fruits are a gift to you from the south
We give at this moment (give fruit)
13. If you are too lazy to cook, but your stomach howled,
Porridge with meat will come in handy to moderate his ardor! (give porridge with meat)
14. A useless little thing, if you take it alone,
But it will come in handy for soup, you need to have it in the house (they give tomato paste). Congratulation with gifts "Women's stuff"
1. Frankly show - the beauty of the face and your body - and you will see in it what you did not want to see in it (give a mirror)
2. Your iron girlfriends, long-legged, long-armed - they keep their hair perfectly, and you look so crowned! (give hairpins)
3. They will cut everything, cut it and put it in order. - on the big number "five", the manicure will shine! (give manicure scissors)
4. You can’t find better girlfriends - and don’t go to a fortuneteller - at least twist it, don’t twist it, everyone needs it very much ... (give curlers)
5. Gently removes makeup, makes a light massage - and at any moment our good friend will help - soft ... (give a sponge)
6. Always take them with you so that they are at hand, their labors are invisible. And if there is no water nearby, they are so important, these ..... (give wet wipes)
7. He is many hundreds of years old, but he looks fresh, we keep the most irreplaceable item at hand. Like the winds of a pure stream - thin ... (give a handkerchief)
8. Like a whole battalion of soldiers, they stand in a box - they will remove extra touches, and cosmetics are sins (they give cotton buds)
9. There is just nothing in it: shadows, a pencil, tweezers, hairpins, mascara, a comb, varnishes, and there is also all sorts of rubbish. A very necessary little thing - for the hostess ... (give a cosmetic bag)
10. It happens plastic and gold, iron, silver and bone - he holds the hair with a strong hand, behind him they are like behind a Chinese wall. He helped every woman at least once - such an irreplaceable ... (rim)
(Such congratulations can be completed by presenting the crown and awarding the title of "Beauty Queen"). Congratulations to the birthday girl from colleagues with gifts.
Perhaps you "lathered" to run away,
But your lot is to continue the work! (gives soap)
Who gets a can of beer
Live happily all year! (gives beer)
Eat bananas and coconuts
And expect rewards from fate! (give banana)
While the boss is "removing shavings" from us,
Quietly make a cup of tea! (gives a mug)
Get this tube as a gift,
To make every tooth shine in the sun! (gives toothpaste)
Since you got chocolate,
Then you will not be bitter - it will be sweet! (gives chocolate)
When you drink cranberry jelly,
Forget the mundane carousel!
Let the world, as they say, wait!
And you will be healthy all year round (give jelly)
Although this cream is inedible,
But the smell is just amazing! (gives hand cream)
To the one who receives this candle,
You have to travel the world! (gives a candle)
To write down where the pay went,
You will really need this pen! (give a pen)
We'll have to live, the work of grief,
And forget about the days of the calendar! (give a calendar)
And great love is waiting for you
And kisses all year round! (give a set of sponges)
Do you understand what the purpose of the gift is?
Life will be joyful and bright! (Give markers)
And you are "in juice", in the prime of life!
Among your friends you have no equal! (gives a bag of juice)
You are well versed in work
And you will be held in high esteem with us all year (give a horseshoe)
Walking with a haircut will be beautiful,
Captivating everyone with a thick, fluffy mane (give shampoo)
You will be cheerful and energetic
And so the whole year will be great! (gives coffee). Hello, dear woman, you are good as a girl.
Though not 25 years old, vigorous mother,
We send you, my dear, a parcel for your birthday.
A little bit here, a little bit here, don't blame me.
If there is no CANDLE in the house, here it is, if the light goes out.
MATCHES and a PIECE OF SOAP so that you wash your face,
And here is a PACK OF CIGARETTES, suddenly you smoke, maybe not.
We have life, you’ll understand, you’ll smoke and drink here.
Here is a PIVASIK for order after the bath, al with the use.
We all blow it ourselves and recommend it to you.
SALA here is a piece 3, so eat or cook,
Stretch until summer, now it's a jewel.
Yes, look, do not get fat, it is better to feed the guests.
Let your foolish friends eat
Kohl do not feel sorry for them figure.
A BOTTLE OF HOLY WATER, drop by drop into the mouth before meals.
So as not to give to anyone, say: "Itself, they say, is not enough."
And the back suddenly hurts, rub it and hold it.
If you get sick, lie down, period, there is a grandson and a son-in-law and a daughter.
Let them wash and wash themselves, let them not disturb their mother.
As soon as you receive the package, take the bottle as soon as possible,
And write the answer as soon as possible, what you like, what you don't.
If there is no money in the house, tie a BROOM to your leg,
You need to wave a broom, collect money in a pile.
That's all goodbye girl, you are for us, well, like a sister,
Pour vodka into glasses and invite guests to drink. Funny greetings from friends “How did we decide what to give!?”
(Two guests participate, at the end they give a rolling pin)
First:
Grandmothers told us yesterday
As if they heard
What is your anniversary here,
Here we come quickly.
Second:
For a long time they could not decide
What to buy as a gift.
The list is long written
And then we both decided.
First:
The steamboat is of no use to you,
Crossed out because.
We put a cross on the locomotive:
Takes up a lot of space.
Second:
The tank will not enter your garage,
The plane won't get in there.
The economy does not need a rocket,
We didn't take her for it.
First:
Kamaz big - rejected,
We removed the tractor from the list,
Submarine .... the lake will spoil,
Helicopter, but where is he going to land!?
Second:
You can donate a car
But this is hard to please.
Giving a bike is no good
And the scooter is quite a shame.
First:
It turns out that with transport - a complete bummer,
Let's move on to something else.
The robbers will remove the necklace of diamonds,
A wallet with money in the market will be taken away,
Second:
You could buy a bag for groceries,
But they figured out in their mind the composition of the whole family,
And it turned out the size of a suitcase,
And this bag is not for ladies at all.
First:
We are at a dead end with this problem,
Faced with a difficult dilemma:
We wanted the mechanism, but the dimensions are not the same
A small gift does not fit the dream.
Second:
It suddenly dawned on us: here is what you need,
You will cook dinner for everyone,
Everyone will eat, and immediately praise you ...
In short, we decided to give a rolling pin (they give a rolling pin). Original congratulation - a surprise for a woman "Fruit cocktail".
(For this unusual congratulations, it is necessary: ​​to lay out the ingredients on a tray ... .., as well as a large glass where we throw everything ...., then when poured with champagne, a large ladle is distributed to women in glasses)

Women themselves are like a basket of fruits.
Take, for example, the beautiful ________
Lips - raspberries, like persiklanita ...
Sweet, fresh, tender _______!
I'll brag to you: ______ breasts
Like appetizing ripe melons,
Lady's fingers ... This is a secret!
A woman, in general, a walking dessert!
Fruit language - little known
And sometimes they don't understand
That, having tasted a delicious fruit,
Seduction will come.
We are for _______ today
Made a cocktail
To make _________ more beautiful
And beautiful as a model!
Put a lot of fruit
To taste this dessert
Our _________ shone,
And she was the most beautiful!
Here is a piece of apple, here is a piece of pear
Ridiculousness and coquetry will be,
If you eat these fruits!
Here's a sweet banana
Ripe, groovy,
If you want to be happy
Take it with you.
Ripe, juicy orange -
Fruit contains the first vitamin.
To always be healthy
Eat slices without shame.
So that in life _____________
Ball of peace and harmony
We put grapes in the cocktail!
To make life more glamorous and more beautiful
Let's add champagne to our fruits! (pouring cocktail).

Presentation of comic gifts for the anniversary in verse

Give a bottle with a pacifier
(for fun, we put the pacifier on a check)
Hello our long-awaited day,
We didn't come here in vain
The table is set, glasses are poured,
Maybe an October holiday?
Maybe celebrate the New Year?
Or May came here?
celebrating a birthday
Our ... half a hundred and five
Among us is a newborn
We congratulate all of her
But, and she should drink from a glass,
The idea is not given!
We will give this pacifier.
Let suck - it's time
And to us for her health
It's time for a drink!
Let it grow and not get sick,
Gathers us once a year.
If she had health
And the rest will come! Taz gift.
For the anniversary, we give a basin, it will always be just right.
You can wash the floors in it, you can milk the cows,
You can pick berries, burp after being drunk,
You can wash with him in the baths, he will come in handy there,
You can wash clothes in it, you can wash your ass,
You can sow flour in it and hang it on a bitch
You can ride down the hill, it will always come in handy,
And how will it be (50.60...) we will come to you again,
Prepare okroshka for us, but find a bigger spoon,
We will pour okroshka into a basin, and we will celebrate the anniversary,
In general, you keep it, do not break it, do not crush it,
Do not leave it in the yard and put it away,
Congratulations on your anniversary, we want to drink everything now,
Who is from the pile, who is from what, and we will drink from it. Comic gift (hell).
In order not to be wise for a long time,
I decided to give
Precious Potion Root
For soul and health
"Horseradish - oops", "horseradish ponadol",
always put the hell on the table.
To forget our problems
Put horseradish in soup and porridge.
If a mondrazh torments you,
Horseradish on bread and roll smear.
And so that there are no problems
Fuck all things.
It has every vitamin
Will add vigor, strength.
To work until dawn
Fuck your head.
He is a balm from a beatner -
And if they come up
You can send everyone to hell! Money as a gift. (Money can be alternated: real and those that are sold in kiosks are fake money).
We planned to give you a service - cheap and nice.
Then they thought, guessed the microwave oven chose ...
Then a food processor for a great design.
And then they decided, no, she's 55 years old, let her go on a cruise where she likes.
We would be happy to send her to Turkey or the Emirates, let her walk in the open, only the sea needs money.
But here we secured ourselves, contacted the fabulous Gene, asked for his help, and now we received the package.
We don’t know what he sent here, we open the package in front of everyone.
Oh, what a miracle it is, how beautiful the pattern of the carpet is, let it please our hero of the day from evening to morning.
You can lie on it, dream about cruises or throw it over your shoulders, it will warm your soul.
And if you take a camera, you won’t find better nature, against the background of this carpet, you can shoot until the morning.
Guests will run to you - can't we lie down on it?
What can I say, beautiful!
We give you this exclusive.
Only the moth so as not to eat, we will sprinkle it quickly,
hero of the day, rather pour a glass for a gift to us! Give beads from pasta
We cannot give you expensive gifts on your birthday,
Because with such and such prices We can't buy anything anywhere.
But do not think that we are not attentive, You are more precious than any gifts,
It's just that we have a wonderful day. It remains only to love you.
Although we can’t give you expensive gifts on your birthday,
But still, with great efforts, We were able to buy something.
And we want to wish you from the bottom of our hearts a Sea of ​​\u200b\u200bhappiness, health, love,
And we will give you a necklace, And we will put it on your shoulders.
You protect him from moths, frost, In him you meet the dawn and sunset,
In a hungry hour, boil it for yourself, And there is no need for huge expenses.
If sadness and sadness visit you, Disperse them with a miracle of miracles,
And sell this wonderful gift, And buy an expensive Mercedes. Comic congratulations on the anniversary for a woman
"And we have a present for you!" After the words of the host, the guests should shout in unison:
"And we, and we have a present for you!"
We are here today for a reason
Gathered together, friends!
Everywhere jokes, congratulations,
Birthday wishes.
birthday girl just
Let's congratulate now!
Come on, guests, join
And scream with all your might
Like someone's got you for something
Bitten very hard.
Tanya got up early today
So that she would not be in a hurry.
Start before it's too late
Get yourself in order.
Tanya comes to a white bath,
To wash your head
And shampoo - well, not a drop.
What to do, how to be here?
Guests in chorus: "And we, and we have a present for you" - (takes out shampoo from the box).
So tired of dressing up
I began to make my way to the kitchen,
To drink coffee
Strength to restore.
But yesterday a neighbor came
And today there is no coffee.
Guests in chorus: "And we, and we have a present for you" - (takes out a bag of coffee from the box).
We know Tanya has a sweet tooth,
She loves sweets.
She didn't eat candy day
And already upset.
Guests in chorus: "And we, and we have a present for you" - (they hand over sweets).
So Tanya began to cook,
Got the best meat.
What to pepper the dish with
So as not to upset the guests?
Guests in chorus: "And we, and we have a gift for you" - (they hand over a bag of pepper)
Finally dinner is ready:
One hundred salads, cake and pilaf.
Here are all the dishes on the table,
Only salt mistress, where?
Guests in unison: "And we, and we have a gift for you" - (they hand over .... a bag of salt)
Here comes the last guest
And a whole load of dishes.
What to do here, how to wash,
Where can I get a sponge?
Guests in chorus: "And we, and we have a gift for you" - (they give .... a sponge)
Don't take it as an insult
This joke is congratulations.
Smile, sing songs
Know that your friends are always with you! 1. Happy birthday, congratulations,
We wish you all the best.
We give technology to you
And fashionable clothes.
To quickly clean the apartment
Get a wonderful car
Very easy to handle
Our "Roventa" vacuum cleaner.
He will wipe anyone's nose,
Will take away all your chaos.
Gently in your hands you will take
You wave in different directions
Instantly dirt from all over the apartment
Scattered - no dust.
He won't take up much space.
It will fit into any slot.
saves kilowatts,
Doesn't rattle and is lightweight.
Everything in the house will shine
There is nowhere for dust to fly (give a broom)
2. Here is the device "Just in case",
In life, he is the best assistant,
With him, grief is not a problem.
He will always help you.
And the name is sonorous
Enema - scientifically.
It is not difficult to apply
We will attach the instructions (they give an enema).
Use it every day
And your migraine will go away
He will remove all the slags from you
The body will look slender.
In general, we tell you
He is irreplaceable in life.
With extensive angina
You can gargle your throat
When renovating an apartment
You can spray paint.
Being with him at the dacha
You spray the bushes.
And then how crazy
Flowers will bloom everywhere.
I think you've made sure
What a miracle we give you
And now boldly through life
You will go with her.
3. As for the outfit
You quickly put it on
You will be a gorgeous woman in it
And Madonna is just a shadow.
Winter panties on wadding
Fit perfectly
Because in November
The cold is fierce in the yard.
Put it on quickly
Lure men to sex.
It's not that hard to warm up together
And you can't freeze
Wearing hot pants
You will live through any cold (diapers are given).
4. And boots from Versace
The last peep is not otherwise.
All their winter you carry
And you won’t get frostbite on your feet (they give slippers or socks or shoe covers)
Emphasize your figure
I broke my long leg.
Klavka Slate would herself
I would go crazy with envy.
In a headset with panties
It will be hot like in the Sahara
You carry gifts
And bless fate.
There will be a reason to drink
We will gather again
Happiness of women without end.
We wish you Happy Birthday.

Congratulations to gifts in comic verses

What is the most best gift in the world?
Anyone can answer this for you.
The gift is convenient and versatile,
A useful gift, a real gift.
Of course, we're talking about money here.
With money, luck will always smile!
We wish you to prosper every moment,
Never know the lack of money! We want to become happier and richer
At least a hundred times!
May good luck accompany you in life
The process will start immediately, now!
May there be happiness and success
Walking confidently!
Let it bear fruit all year round
You money tree! Why break your head here
What is the best gift for the holidays.
I will congratulate you
Money along with poetry!
May they live forever
In your pot-bellied purse.
Buy yourself a present
To remember me for a long time! Give different gifts
And friends and relatives,
Mugs, books, lighters,
Plus, postcards!
I think that on a holiday,
It's time to create miracles!
For the desires of the most diverse,
I will donate money! I give you the most valuable amulet,
To save you from various troubles,
From misfortunes, evil eye and slander, -
Do not accidentally lose the amulet. The way to your heart toryu -
I give you a car!
On it, I hope, under the moon
You will only go to me! Giving wine glasses
Playful and sweet.
Of these, you always drink to the bottom,
To the drop, without a trace.
Let from the sound of crystal
All troubles run away
Let you like a king
Meet in the company. What do kids play
On the field, in the yard without a net,
On the court, in the park and on the beach,
And even in a long corridor?!
Here, keep badminton as a present
And do not be friends with laziness anymore! Aborigines who live in Australia
Invented a wise apparatus -
Throw him far away
He always comes back.
He got the name boomerang,
I am happy to present it to you.
I give it with such hope -
Wherever you are on earth,
Wherever fate takes you,
So that you always come back to me. We present a racket as a gift!
Wave to her from the heart and what is the strength?
We only ask you one thing:
Invite us all to the World Cup! The first transport for a child -
Well, of course, a scooter.
He will laugh out loud
And will be happy to ride.
For health and fun
And for speed.
Good luck - push the asphalt
And the scooter will go. How do you manage without bandanas?
My question is really stupid...
A present for you - a bandana - is given:
In the district brighter than all scarves!
Now, my dear hipster,
Don't put your brains under it! Not a tattoo and a T-shirt,
Not with perfume bubble -
My present to you is a baseball cap,
Very long visor!
And protect from the sun and sand,
And without it, life would not be b - melancholy! Well, what else do we need? -
Slide on the boards on the waves!
I am talking about this for a reason:
I give you a surf, my friend!
And remember: a storm in the ocean
More dangerous and cooler than in a glass! We give you a birthday
Here is this wonderful bracelet,
So that mood and pressure
It's been normal for years!
Wear it often, dear
For as long as you can!
Well, when you take off the bracelet,
You remember who gave! What will I give my baby,
What will make you happy?
Accept this brooch as a gift
Unique beauty!
You can easily wear it
And always remember me! So that from now on with bristles
The battle was successful
Accept, oh, our young man.
This razor is a gift! Here I give you a keychain
To save he could
Everything, even a key from happiness!
He will be your companion! Someone gives car keys
I give only a keychain to those keys ...
If you are a real man
You can buy a car yourself! I give you beauty
These amazing tights!
The men open their mouths
If you wear them!

Congratulations on the topic

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