Only loved ones betray...

Only very close
They can hurt just like that, by the way ...
From the desire to argue, to tell you in revenge,
Out of a sadistic need to live with you,
Out of resentment at the truth, at a request, comparison,
Out of dislike for you...
Due to the harmfulness of opinion ...

I've seen everything, I've even seen
From which the blood freezes and the will shrinks,
But nothing squeezed my heart stronger
Like the slightest meanness of my own friends...
Like the shamelessness of loved ones ...
Like rudeness of a native ...
No matter how out of place, not by the hour, not by the money again ...

Only loved ones hurt...

close only
They can hurt with their word, quarrel!
Only they will forget about your birthday!
Only they do not call on weekdays, on Sundays!
And then, calling, only very close ones
They can lie that they were looking for you days and nights!
They want to invite you sometime...
Whether this winter, or last fall ...
And then a broken hour only close people
They can steal your time with their verbiage!

Our world is arranged strangely ...

Others need us...
Strangers bring smiles and flowers to us!
It’s easy with them: they give themselves to us…
Sending greetings, suffering, loving...
Strangers walk by
Do not touch us all with their misfortune ...
But only who will become close - everything is on-o-bo-mouth ...
A bunch of their own will bring to your difficulties ...
Instead of laughter - showdowns, reproaches, scandals ...
Instead of someone else's happiness - native poison ...

I am wrong?!

But why so many tears?
Not "foreign" cause of tears, you will immediately understand ...

The paradox of paradoxes!

You can't live without loved ones!
Well, sometimes half a day is enough with them,
So that, having sated, again pulled to strangers
For dating, for poetry, for evening walks ...
For trips to the theater, to the cinema, to nature ...
For endless conversations in any weather ...

Yes, without relatives it is impossible!

They are dear to all of us!
But, having become close - native you should become the whole essence!
Must mother, betrothed to live every day!
You must cherish your son and daughter!

You, like God, should appreciate a friend, a girlfriend!

And then everyone will not leave - they will be with you!

© Anatoly Kosenko.

The first publication of the poem was carried out on 25.08.2011. on my page in Poetry.ru http://www.stihi.ru/avtor/niigroup, where there are more than 800 works and more than 141,000 readers

Probably, indeed, betrayal is the worst thing that can be. Betrayal of friends, relatives, those whom we do not doubt, those whom we trust without hesitation. It's like losing the earth under our feet and the sky above our heads, because those whom we trust, after all, they are our earth and our sky.

Isn't it stupid to uproot a good old tree in order to hopefully stick a dubious market seedling in its place. Isn't it stupid to torment the good old, whether it be wives or leaders, for the sake of their naive hopes.

Understanding, sympathy, kindness, love are the only ideals. And when we betray them, we become what we despise. And we lose our humanity, and then after us in the world there is only violence and destruction.

Loyalty in love is entirely a matter of physiology, it does not depend on our will at all. Young people want to be faithful - and they don't, old people would like to change, but where can they be.

Betrayal of a man is not treason. Betrayal is not that he left for another. Betrayal - when the fact that you are pregnant ... he will tell you to go for an abortion.

Thanks to those who left me in difficult times. You have made me stronger. So much stronger that it's better for us not to cross paths.

Reliability is a stigma, for the acquisition of which it is necessary to do some dirty trick.

Never forgive change. Any betrayal is a comparison, a search for something better than you have. He who seeks the best will never appreciate what he has...

We must remember that those things that bring you a lot of money will betray you sooner or later.

He who has sold his homeland also sells himself.

What could be more humiliating for the betrayer than the realization that they were not able to properly use his betrayal.

Kings know no more about the affairs of their ministers than cuckolds know about the affairs of their wives.

Don Juan is the one who cheats on a woman, but not on women.

It's a shame when you are a Judas, and they sell you like Christ.

Betrayal, destroying hope and faith, kills love.

That physical betrayal is only a consequence of spiritual betrayal. For people who have given each other love have no right to lie.

Nothing in the world smells so good as the corpse of an enemy, a traitor or a traitor.

Love is not a matter of morality. But feeling knows no betrayal. It grows, disappears, changes - where is the betrayal? It's not a contract.

To whom chastity is a burden, he should not be advised of it, lest it become a path to hell, turning into filth and lust of the soul.

Whoever is alive waits in vain for the praise of the arrogant crowd. Only the devotion of friends is the treasure of the masters, It is more beautiful than all the riches of the world.

The most cruel, the most evil and intolerant of their opponents are traitors and renegades.

He is capable of any deception who is accustomed to making white out of black and black out of white.

Keep me, Lord, from those I trust. Whom I do not believe - I will beware of those myself.

Betrayal, like the law, has no retroactive effect.

When your head is turned, it is difficult to notice the moment when your neck has already been turned.

It is pointless to kill petty traitors in a state where the government itself consists of traitors.

Love and friendship - this is what you have to endure betrayal and betrayal.

The first betrayal is irreparable. It sets off a chain reaction of further betrayals, each of which moves us further and further away from the point of our original betrayal.

Forgiving betrayal is little different from betrayal itself.

He already left you once and will leave you again. You can't depend on people who let you down.

Believing the vows of a traitor is like believing the piety of the devil.

The biggest competition is in the market for salable skins.

Every backstab has its own face.

You can't betray one to protect the many.

Closest to the body is a selling skin.

Is there even one person who has never betrayed? Loyalty - exclusively canine quality!

The betrayal of the people closest to us kills us slowly, very slowly... It seems to rip off the skin from your entire being... you can live without a soul, you can live without a hand... but without skin? When your body is one continuous wound?

He was a personality, he betrayed - he became a circumlocution.

Paulo Coelho

Have you ever been betrayed, dear readers? I'm sure they betrayed. That's why you showed interest in this article, isn't it? And now you want to know how you can continue to live with the pain in your soul that you experience and that haunts you. However, it is quite possible that you yourself betrayed someone, and because of this, you now have a heavy burden on your soul that you want to get rid of. You want to know what it is like to be betrayed, you want to understand how the person who has been betrayed feels, how much his pain is. And you will definitely find out about this, because in this article I am going to tell you everything I know about betrayal. And I know a lot about him, believe me. Betrayal is something that I have repeatedly encountered in my life, not only as a specialist, but also as a person who was cruelly betrayed several times. Therefore, I will share with you not only my knowledge of betrayal, but also my feelings. Unfortunately, betrayal is an integral part of our lives. People betrayed, betrayed and apparently will continue to betray each other. And if so, then it is quite obvious that you need to be able to live with betrayal, regardless of whether you betrayed you or you betrayed. Betrayal should be treated with understanding so that it does not poison the soul and does not poison life. Let's, friends, find out what betrayal is and see how you can live with it.

For some people who have experienced the pain of betrayal in their own skin, it is very difficult to understand why people betray each other at all, why they treat others the way they would not like to be treated. On the other hand, those people who betrayed someone themselves sometimes look for justification for their traitorous act, and as a rule, they find it. It is possible to understand, and I think that it is necessary, both of them. After all, we are all people, which means that everything is not without sin. But in order to understand another person, even a betrayer, even a betrayer, you need to try to see yourself in him. I tried to cover the topic of betrayal in as much detail as possible, given its importance, and I am sure that I managed to do it. So you will definitely benefit from reading this material, you can be sure of it. I want to tell you, friends, that I have worked both with those people who were betrayed, sometimes very cruelly, and with those who once betrayed someone. And in most cases, both suffer from betrayal. Indeed, in the depths of our souls, we all understand that some actions, regardless of our attitude towards them, are not quite, let's say, necessary in this life, that they do more harm than good. Just think how many problems we could avoid if we thought about the consequences of our actions. After all, traitors do not always benefit from their treacherous acts, on the contrary, they often suffer from them themselves, because the consequences of these acts can be terrible for everyone. And if these traitors had been a little more prudent, they would not have betrayed other people, especially those close and devoted to them. After all, betraying others, we often betray ourselves!

Betrayal can lead to a lot of negative consequences, which then not always and not everyone manages to cope with. Therefore, I believe that when someone betrays someone, he commits a great evil. I have seen this evil, I have worked with this evil, I have pulled devoted people out of the most terrible conditions they were in because of the pain they experienced. People suffer very, very much when they are betrayed, maybe not all, but many, that's for sure. Therefore, my attitude towards betrayal is extremely negative. Well, what can I say, some devoted people even grow old for several years, because of the stress they experienced, while the traitor himself is often forced to live with guilt until the end of his life. So, friends, by betraying other people, we can take away several years of their lives, and for what, for what kind of benefits, for what kind of benefit? I don’t think that shitting into someone else’s soul is too profitable, in any case, I have not met happy traitors in my life who built great happiness on someone else’s misfortune. Well, let's deal with this issue in more detail.

What is betrayal?

About how much pain, what incredible suffering and what damage someone's betrayal can cause a person, many of us know well, or, in any case, guess. This is especially well known to those who have already been betrayed at least once in this life. But not many people know what betrayal is. Our experiences and our pain do not give us an answer to simple and natural questions: “why?”, “for what?” and for what?" betrayed us? Do you know what is the most interesting? Traitors themselves often do not know this!

Betrayal is called a violation of allegiance to someone or failure to fulfill a duty to someone. The moral laws of society condemn betrayal and traitors, just like most religions, they consider treacherous acts a sin, a violation of taboos. Traitors really do great evil when they betray someone, because by their traitorous deeds they destroy the moral foundations on which our society is built. They destroy such a thing as people's trust in each other. After all, in any society, we adhere to certain rules and norms for a reason, not because we just want to follow some rules that restrict us in our actions, but in order for this very society to exist. If we do not follow certain rules, the whole order in our society will be broken and all-destroying chaos will come. Honesty and loyalty are the laws of maintaining order in society, and when a traitor violates these laws, he violates it, society, stability and stability. Traitors - kill trust, not only to themselves, but to everyone else. Being betrayed once, we begin to see the catch in everything, we are already afraid to fully trust someone and reveal our soul to someone, our life becomes more closed, people in our society become more closed, more alien and hostile to each other. This is the evil that traitors commit, this is how much they harm our society. They, in fact, destroy it, thereby harming themselves.

You can betray in different ways, you can simply deceive a person, so, you know, on trifles, for example, cheating him in a store, and thus violating his confidence in himself. And you can completely trample on a person’s soul, completely destroying his inner world, through, for example, the same betrayal. Be that as it may, both big and small betrayal are a stab in the back, a blow below the belt, this is no doubt a mean and very cruel act, having decided on which, the traitor crosses the line beyond which his human qualities slowly but surely degrade . We all know what the betrayal of Judas led to, and apparently humanity will never change in this sense in better side, as people betrayed each other, to their own detriment, they will continue to betray. So, we can consider the following acts as betrayal:

• Adultery.
• Leaving a friend/girlfriend in trouble.
• Treason.
• Abandonment by parents of their children.
• Apostasy (religious apostasy).

The meaning of all the above actions comes down to the fact that all of them, one way or another, cause harm to someone or something. As a matter of fact, the word “betray” itself, according to dictionaries, means “breach of allegiance to someone or something, and this word also means to leave or surrender someone.” That is, this phenomenon is associated with destruction. We destroy the outer world when we betray someone or something, and we destroy the inner world to the person we betray. Traitors undoubtedly worsen our life and defile the beauty of this world. But on the other hand, they make the people they betray stronger and smarter, but more on that later.

Most painful of all, we experience the betrayal of loved ones, from whom we simply do not expect a stab in the back. And how can we expect it from them, because the people we love are the people we used to trust. These are people whom we unconditionally trust and for whom we are ready for anything. These are people with a capital letter, for us. And we, of course, expect a similar attitude from them. We want to be reciprocated, we want to be sure of the reliability of those people who are not indifferent to us and whom we ourselves do not even plan to betray. But this is precisely the danger for us, it lies in the fact that we do not allow the possibility of betrayal of us, by people close and loved by us. We ourselves leave our rear areas unprotected, and this should never be done, no matter how much we would like to believe some people and not see them as a threat.

The cruelty with which our loved ones betray us is, of course, astounding. However, for some soulless people, treacherous acts are the norm, not savagery, and we must understand this in order to be prepared for a similar scenario in our lives. After all, each of us can be betrayed at any moment. And it is our unpreparedness for betrayal that betrays us in the first place. Suppose, for a decent, honest wife, the betrayal of her husband can be a real shock, because she, for her part, did everything for the family, for the house, for the children, if any, and of course for the husband, and here such a blow, such cruelty. And it seems that we all know that the more you do good to people, the more cruelly they can act with us later, not all of course, a reasonable person will never spit in a soul open to him, but many people will do it, they will really betray who was kind to them. Do you know why? Because most people are stupid. They are driven by their own, including predatory instincts, and not by common sense. This is why people are hard to trust. And anyway, we do this good, we do it to those in whom we believe, whom we love, whom we hope for. We want to believe that the people around us are reasonable, we are well aware that more than ninety percent of people are unreasonable, but we want the remaining percentage to surround us, we believe in this because we want to believe. However, the traitors in us are killing this faith.

So the heaviest and most cruel betrayal is a betrayal in love, when the egoism of one person kills the brightest, purest and most sincere feelings another man. If you have been betrayed by a loved one, you know how painful it is, how hard it is, how terrible it is. After such a betrayal, a person finds himself in a deep knockout, the world around turns black, confusion in his head, heaviness in his soul, and an unbearable stabbing pain in his heart, from which you don’t know where to go. Many went through this ordeal in their lives, and someone else has yet to go through it, because traitors have always been, are, and apparently will be among us. And therefore, someone will always suffer from their callousness, cruelty and callousness. Unfortunately, and in my opinion, and fortunately, love and betrayal will always be inextricably linked with each other. Unfortunately, because someone will suffer from this, but fortunately, because being devoted, we become wiser, we become stronger, we no longer live in the illusions in which we used to live.

Thus, traitors, when they betray us, inoculate us against weakness, and if we continue to live, and thank God, this is exactly what happens in most cases, then we become much stronger, smarter, wiser, more protected from external aggression from traitors . If a young guy survived the betrayal of his girlfriend, he will no longer be the same, his views on the world, on people, and in particular on women, will change greatly. He will not necessarily hate all women, and he should not do this, he will simply be much smarter from now on and will not let anyone into his heart. The same with a girl, a woman who was betrayed by a man, if she turns out to be smart and understands the lesson presented to her, she will no longer let any male who thinks only about sex close to her. And even more so, she will not allow some “Don Juan” to settle in her heart, so that later it will be broken. Life makes us wiser if we draw conclusions from the pain we have experienced, and traitors are our teachers, they teach us not to trust people. It is difficult, of course, to live without trust in people, and in principle it is impossible to do this, we have to trust someone. But, we can be more prudent and more careful when we trust people, can't we? So in this sense, the betrayal of a loved one is even useful and necessary for us, and at least once in life, we need to go through this test in order to become wise.

We are betrayed not only by loved ones, but also by friends who usually reflect ourselves to us, because as they say - tell me who your friend is and I will tell you who you are. Therefore, friends must be chosen very carefully and not be friends with just anyone, because a well-disguised enemy may turn out to be a friend or girlfriend. The betrayal of friends is easier to survive, although it unsettles us, although it causes great damage to our inner world, it still does not completely devastate our soul, as is the case with devoted love. Traitor friends, after their betrayal of us, leave us something, they leave us faith in ourselves, depriving us of hope in them - in our friends and in people in general. In this world, a person must hope, first of all, for himself, all the other people who surround him can betray him at any moment, and sometimes very cruelly. But for some of us to understand it, it has to be experienced. And when friends betray us, they confirm this truth with their own, albeit vile, but very instructive act for us. Therefore, dear readers, try not to let your friends get too close to you. After all, if the betrayal of a friend or the betrayal of a friend came as a surprise to you, it means that you simply did not notice how you yourself put your back under the blow for your friends, which they, in the series of callousness and insignificance of their sinful little soul, finally decided.

Having survived the betrayal of people close to you, you will understand that it doesn’t matter what kind of person we are talking about, no matter who he is to you, because if this person is not reasonable, you can expect anything and anytime from him. Many times I have dealt with people who have been betrayed by their own parents, children, wives and husbands, best friends and girlfriends, others, very close and, it would seem, reliable people, from whom a treacherous act should be expected last. But, many, nevertheless, decide on this act, regardless of any moral barriers. It's all about human weakness. Think for yourself, what kind of phenomenon is this - the betrayal of people, why does it take place in our lives? Is this not a manifestation of weakness, not of her alone, of course, but of her as well? To betray someone is easy, you see, much easier than not to betray. All that is needed for this is simply to give up all our obligations to a person or people, to give up everything spiritual and rational that is in us, to throw off all humanity, all responsibility, to give up willpower and to succumb to the influence of our primitive animals. instincts.

By itself, the theme of betrayal will always be relevant. That's how long people live on this planet, that's how long they betray each other. Cheating has always been, is, and will be a part of our life, no matter how conventionally civilized and developed this life is. Because, for the time being, in any case, we cannot educate and educate people according to one common standard for all of us, so that the behavior of each person, without exception, meets both the interests of society as a whole and the interests of each of us in particular. And the people themselves, for the most part, are still, unfortunately, too weak and unreasonable to give an account of all their actions and bear full responsibility for all their actions. The logic of most people is very simple - their shirt is closer to the body. Therefore, if it is beneficial for a person to betray someone, for the sake of his own skin, he will betray.

And it doesn’t matter that none of us will survive in this world alone, and it doesn’t matter that one bad deed can give rise to a whole series of the same bad deeds that will make life in society very difficult and dangerous for most people. These simple truths, not everyone is able to understand and not everyone wants to understand them. After all, understanding these truths is a responsibility that must be borne. And she's so heavy. While people feel good, they do as they want, but when they feel bad, they begin to do as they should. Well, now we'll talk about why people generally betray each other. Read about it below.

Why do people betray each other?

Throughout its history, humanity has experienced quite a lot of suffering, which, ideally, should have become useful lessons for each of us, because we need to learn from others, and not from our own mistakes! History teaches us how to act and how not to act, and she explains to us with her examples why it is impossible to act in a certain way. But, alas, no mistakes of our ancestors and the suffering caused by them taught humanity as a whole, the mind of reason, it both made these mistakes and continues to make them. And it turns out that many of our ancestors suffered in vain, because we are again stepping on the same rake that they stepped on. People have been repeatedly convinced that betrayal is very harmful to any orderly society, that it is evil, it is a sin, and this is obvious. Otherwise, any normal society would not condemn this phenomenon. And almost everyone condemns him. And yet, people continue to betray each other, they do evil without thinking about the consequences, and they, these consequences, always come.

Well, in this case, let's try to figure out why people betray each other, why they commit treacherous acts that can harm, including themselves. There are several reasons that force people to commit this terrible, insidious, treacherous and disgusting act - betrayal.

1. selfishness. Being a terrible egoist, a person can betray anyone at any moment. And note that this is far from being about healthy egoism, in which people always calculate the consequences of their decisions, we are talking about stupid, reckless, irresponsible childish egoism, in which a person in his decisions proceeds exclusively from momentary and often dubious benefits.

2. Weakness. As I wrote above, weak, in every sense of the word, people are prone to betrayal. Lack of willpower, weak character, low level intellectual development, spiritual and moral poverty, because of all this, a person can easily decide on betrayal in order to solve some of his problems and / or fulfill some of his desires at the expense of other people. Weak people look for easy solutions to complex problems, so betraying them is easier than not betraying them.

3. unconsciousness. When a person does not understand what, why and why he is doing, he can do such things that he himself will not be happy with them later. Acting unconsciously, a person acts as if in a dream, he does not understand anything, does not control anything, his behavior is primitive, spontaneous, chaotic, and often does not correspond to common sense at all. It is clear that an unconscious person can easily betray anyone at any moment, even the people closest and dearest to him, simply by simply reacting in a primitive way to some situation conducive to betrayal. And interestingly, an unconscious person often does not even understand the horror of his treacherous act.

Let's now, dear readers, consider with you in more detail the above reasons that push people onto the path of betrayal. There are, of course, other reasons why people betray each other, but these are the reasons that I indicated above - they are friends, the main ones.

selfishness

Some people, for their own benefit, even the most insignificant, are ready for anything, they stop at nothing when they seek to satisfy their desires, and therefore they can betray anyone, even those closest to them, for the sake of themselves and their interests. Egoists, it should be noted, are very unpleasant people, and usually normal people are not comfortable with them. We can meet selfish, and therefore potential traitors, everywhere, but for a start, it would be more correct to pay attention to yourself. Remember how often you personally neglected the interests of other people, for your own benefit? Here you need to get something, here you want something, and you do everything to fulfill your desire, without thinking at all about how this can affect the people around you. You do not think about those people to whom, perhaps, your actions aimed at satisfying your desires can somehow harm, cause discomfort, inconvenience or even pain, because the main thing for you is your own interests, and other people are up to them you don't, absolutely don't care. Have you had this in your life? Now, if you had something like this in your life, with you, then you probably found an excuse for your selfish actions, and for sure, you were inclined to betray someone, at least in your thoughts, in order to get something for yourself or to avoid something, for example, some problems. So, other people act in a similar way, selfish, of course, people. And all right, if these problems, for which we betray someone, were serious when it comes to life and death, and when the traitor has to choose - either he or someone else who can be betrayed must suffer. But no, egoists betray without a special, acute need for them in this act, but only because of their whim or because of their immeasurable desires.

So some people have always betrayed, betray and will betray each other. And they will do this not only in difficult, hopeless situations, when it comes to their lives, which, of course, is worth fighting for, and when their betrayal can still somehow be justified. They will do it whenever they see fit. People can also become traitors and because of various minor trifles, they can become traitors in situations that are completely harmless to them, for the sake of insignificant, and often very dubious benefits. These are “small”, one might even say that miserable people, and sometimes complete insignificance, not capable of anything good and great, but only capable of harming other people. These are selfish, not the most pleasant creatures in this world. We need to be very careful with such people, and not let them get too close to us, so that later we do not complain about their insignificance and wretchedness, when they cynically betray us at the first opportunity. Therefore, carefully look at the people who surround you and with whom you intend to do business. If you see that they are terrible egoists, that their childish egoism is right out of their ears, if they are capricious, arrogant, greedy, think only about themselves and spit on other people, even on the people closest to them - in no way Don't trust these selfish people. In general, you can’t trust anyone in this life, to the fullest extent, but you can’t trust egoists all the more, compare it to suicide, or masochism.

Moreover, speaking of selfishness as a phenomenon pushing people to betrayal, I am talking about unhealthy, childish selfishness, and not about selfishness in general, which is characteristic of all healthy people. It's just that people with healthy egoism understand how their personal interests are intertwined with the interests of other people, they understand that for a normal life, everyone, or at least most people, should live more or less well. Healthy egoists are much more reasonable, more prudent, more social and benevolent in their lives than unreasonable egoists. They know that by thinking only of themselves, they will thereby alienate other people whom they could count on, if necessary, with whom they could build mutually beneficial relationships. Healthy egoists are smart egoists, and unhealthy egoists are children for whom treacherous acts are not only something immoral, but also harmful. So, in reality, we are all selfish, and this is normal, another thing is how healthy our egoism is, and as a result, how responsible we are for ourselves and our actions. If we are talking about a smart person who knows how to competently defend his personal interests, without significantly infringing on the interests of other people, then in such a person you can, if not completely, but to a large extent, be sure, and such a person, if he betrays, then in himself last resort. But from stupid egoists who, like children, think only of themselves, it is better to stay away, or, in any case, not to trust them.

And here's what else is important to know about betrayal generated by selfishness. All people in one way or another strive for pleasure, and each person, to the best of his ability and depending on the level of his intellectual development, enjoys different things, different things, and in different quantities. A normal person seeks to enjoy things and actions that improve his life, and a stupid person will enjoy harming himself, for example, by harming his health. Well, you understand, tobacco, alcohol, drugs, irresponsible sex with bad consequences, all these are fun for stupid, and usually poor people. In addition, an intelligent person knows in pleasures, as well as in his desires, the measure, adhering to which, he does not allow these pleasures to harm him and his life. And also, he does not allow his pleasures to harm those around him, dear to him, people. But a stupid person is ready to put everything on the altar of pleasure, and is ready to enjoy endlessly until everything around him, including himself, is destroyed. As you probably guessed, I am talking about those egoists who are ready to betray anyone and anything for pleasure. And the more selfish a person is by nature, the more importance he attaches to all sorts of pleasures, for the sake of which many egoists live. Therefore, with those who passionately desire to do themselves very well, you need to keep your eyes open so that they, for the sake of this good of their own, do not do bad to you.

Weakness

Very often people betray each other because of their weakness. And above all, we are talking about their spiritual weakness, because of which people simply cannot, and often do not want to, correspond to the image of an honest, decent, responsible, strong man who you can rely on and trust. Being strong is not easy, but being a weakling, being a scum, a traitor, is easy. Weak people, who are also often lazy, and at the same time cowardly, are used to looking for simple solutions to complex problems, and therefore, when it is easier for them to betray than to do otherwise, they, not wanting to strain, betray. A weak person will always find an excuse for his betrayal, he will say that he could not do otherwise. For example, he could not help but leave his young wife with a child, because he was not ready to become a father. A mother who abandoned her child can say that she was forced to do this, because the circumstances in her life developed in such a way that it was more correct not even for herself, but for her child, if she left him. In general, you must have met people in your life who always find an excuse for their disgusting deeds, which they might not have committed if they had the strength of mind and willpower, but they did, in the absence of them. So when a person is, first of all, morally, spiritually and intellectually weak, and secondly, physically weak, he can betray anyone, and in practically any emergency, or even just stressing him, situation. And then he can justify himself and his act, in his own eyes, referring to the need for this act, to its obligation. Say, nothing else but to betray someone, due to the circumstances, he had no choice. Of course, a person could not do otherwise, what else could he do, he did what he had to do - he betrayed. That's all the excuses. In life, often, such “weaklings” then pay for their treacherous deeds, because any weakness in this world, in any case, is punishable. These are the laws of life. Weak people have no place in it.

Weaklings are very cowardly, which is natural for them, and we all should not forget about this either. Morally, spiritually and intellectually weak people are afraid of a lot in this life, and often fear forces them to betray even those people in whose betrayal they are not at all interested. Fear, unconscious, animal fear, first of all, gives rise to panic, hysteria, chaos in the head, because of which people slide into their animal state and begin to act exclusively instinctively, without any share of common sense. You understand, it is not difficult to betray in such a state, it is difficult not to betray, if not impossible. So people betray, they act solely on the basis of a momentary situation, without taking into account the consequences that their unconscious actions can lead to, because they are not aware of their actions. Thus, if you see that a person is a coward, be prepared for the fact that he can betray you, because he can do it.

unconsciousness

Unconsciousness, friends, is another, rather large, but, nevertheless, natural flaw for most people, which forces them to betray each other. An unconscious person is both an egoist, a weakling, a scoundrel, and in general, this is an unreasonable person, the meaning of whose actions is often incomprehensible even to himself. So he does such things, the whole meaning of which he is simply not able to understand. After all, it is far from always that a person who betrays someone benefits from his act, especially if we proceed from the long-term perspective, when after spitting into a well, after some time we return to it in order to get drunk. And in general, if we talk about the weakness and selfishness of a person, then these of his qualities are directly related to his unreasonableness, and the unreasonableness of a person is associated with his unconsciousness. If a person does not realize what and why he is doing, if he does not take into account possible consequences his actions, both for himself and for other people, if his actions harm, including himself, then such a person simply cannot be called reasonable. How is such a person different, let's say, from a cat? Nothing. It only has more functions, and it is more complicated than a cat, but it makes no difference. Well, what do we want from an unreasonable person who is not aware of what and why he is doing? Is it not high spiritual and moral qualities? Come on, primitive creatures, to which some people belong, to their and our regret, they are simply not capable of something high and worthy, for which a person can be called a person. For them, their primitive animal instincts are their inner voice and serve as the basis for them to make certain decisions in their lives, it is only these instincts that prompt them to act, and not some kind of common sense.

In the same way, being, either completely or partially, unreasonable people, some people betray, let's say, by mistake, which they later greatly regret. Human stupidity, unfortunately, as we know, knows no limits, and sometimes a person can betray us without any substantial reason. Of course, this does not change the essence of the matter, but still, when a person made a mistake to a greater extent and betrayed someone to a lesser extent, then, in principle, he can be forgiven. Although, of course, in the future you will have to be on the alert with him, because there can no longer be complete trust in such a person. You and I cannot hope that this or that person, who betrayed us because of his unawareness, suddenly, for no reason at all, will begin to see clearly and it will be possible to begin to trust him. If this happens, it is very rare and only with a few people. Therefore, I do not recommend that you hope for this tiny miracle. Do you want to forgive the person who betrayed you? Great, sorry. If only he deserves it. But I do not recommend trusting him in the future, because by God, in this case, you risk stepping on the same rake twice.

How to deal with betrayal?

As for the attitude towards betrayal, I suggest that you treat this phenomenon, and to each specific traitorous act, no matter who committed it, calmly and indifferently. Yes, I understand that you can object to me by saying that this is not the case when you can remain calm and ignore the treacherous act of a person because of which you suffered greatly, especially if it is a very close and a person very dear to you. But, if you prepare for such a scenario and not only assume the likelihood that anyone, even the most reliable person from your point of view, can betray you, but also imagine this, then you can make such a development of events a norm for yourself and, accordingly, to him to prepare. You understand, friends, that the whole point is in our expectations, which are either justified or not. It is because of this that we suffer when someone betrays us. We expect one thing from them, but they surprise us with another, they betray us, and we are unprepared for this stab in the back. That's the whole problem.

People are imperfect, and this has long been known, and for some people it is generally difficult to be people, it is much easier for them to be animals and behave accordingly. And therefore, people, because of their imperfection, for the most part, in principle, are naturally inclined to betrayal. And those people who are at a very low level of development are all the more prone to betrayal, and not only to betrayal, but also to many other bad deeds. So why expect anything good from them? It would be more correct to expect from any person, first of all, the worst, meanest and basest deed, and prepare to give a worthy response to it, than to place too high hopes on, no matter what person, and then be upset because he did not justify them. . We can only hope for good deeds from other people, and rejoice in the fact that they are committed by them, and, if possible, reciprocate them in order to maintain the unspoken rules of human behavior in society. But to demand from people a certain attitude towards themselves, the observance of some kind of obligations, loyalty, devotion, honesty, responsibility, this is too naive. After all, no one really owes you anything in this life. And no matter what obligations this or that person fetters himself and no matter what he personally promises you, he can refuse all this at any moment, according to own will. We deceive ourselves when we recklessly trust other people and completely unreasonably believe in other people, placing our hopes on them, which is why we suffer from betrayal, for which in most cases we are simply not ready.

Of course, each of us can have, and usually has, some of his own beliefs, and based on these beliefs, he can evaluate certain actions of other people, and even his own actions. Actually, we all have the right to this, the right to our opinion. But it is beneficial for us to be more flexible in our views on life, so as not to try to squeeze everything that happens in it into the narrow framework of our limited worldview. Everything, including betrayal, has the right to exist in this world, everything has its own necessity, its own benefit, and everything has its own regularity. Therefore, we must understand that lies and betrayal are just as natural phenomena in our lives as are their opposites - honesty, valor, responsibility, love. We must be able to get along with all people and with all their actions, both good and bad. Therefore, I repeat once again, betrayal should be treated calmly and indifferently, preparing yourself in advance for the fact that anyone, I repeat, anyone can betray you. Accept it, and then no one will be able to stun you with their traitorous behavior.

How to survive betrayal?

Well, if you were not ready for betrayal, and it so happened that you were betrayed, then what to do next, how to survive the betrayal? First of all, friends, look at the pattern of what happened to you, do not accept what happened to you as something that falls out of your picture of the world. If you were betrayed, then this act had its own reason, I will not say that it has its own justification, but that it has an explanation, that's for sure. People are selfish, cowardly, stupid, greedy, insidious, and therefore they will always have reasons to commit this or that bad deed, bad, for someone else, first of all, but not for themselves. We can be betrayed at any moment, no one is immune from this, so there is nothing to be surprised at, you just need to understand what and why we lost sight of that we allowed someone to betray us. We must learn from our defeats, from our misfortunes, from our pain, so that in the future we no longer allow ourselves such stupidity as absolute trust in other people. Therefore, when we are betrayed, we are taught, we are made smarter, wiser, and therefore stronger, which means that traitors, sometimes without realizing it, do good for us.

Thus, someone's weakness and stupidity makes us stronger, and we, in fact, should rejoice in this, rejoice in the fact that someone betrayed us, no matter how absurd it may sound. After all, if life throws us hard trials, it places great hopes on us, it believes in us. And if life itself believes in us, then why shouldn't we believe in ourselves, why should we perceive the betrayal of another person as some kind of our defeat, as damage caused to us by someone? It is better to look at it as a victory, and see in this bad deed for us, from which we suffered, new opportunities for our development, because being devotees, we change our lives by changing our views on it. We become stronger if we do not die after betrayal, and we usually do not die from it. We break off our relationship with a traitor or take it to a qualitatively new level, and these are completely different opportunities, a completely different life. And we get a very useful experience for us, without which it is quite difficult to survive in this harsh world. A devoted person is a person wise by experience, he is cautious with people and does not fully trust them, this is a person whom life has made more mature. Thus, friends, the practicality of your thinking will save you from destructive emotions that overshadow your reason and cause you pain that you experience from betraying you by another person or other people.

Also, you must understand that around you and me, often there may not be very smart people who do not understand what and why they are doing. Such people betray by mistake, or rather, by stupidity, succumbing to the influence of emotions generated by the instinctive urges I have described above, and often their mistakes harm not only those around them, but also themselves. Mistake or betrayal? How to distinguish one from the other? Very simply, you need to pay attention to how conscious the actions of this or that person are, to what extent the results obtained by him justify, first of all, his own expectations. And you must understand that a person who harms not only other people, but also himself, is not a very smart person. Well, if a person is just a fool, then he will first do something, and then think what he did. So, acting unconsciously, you can make an incredible number of mistakes in your life, you can betray everyone, including yourself, and then regret what you have done. I'm sure you've come across such people in your life. And, as it were, to be offended by them, this is already stupid on our part, because their stupidity is their misfortune, not their fault. But to have, with such stupid people, any business, if it should be, then very carefully. Because, you yourself understand, an unreasonable person is an unpredictable, inconsistent, irresponsible person who does not deserve to be trusted, and along with it, respect. Now, if it was just such a fool who betrayed you, or a fool, then taking this betrayal too close to your heart is superfluous. You shouldn't be doing this. Do not attach great importance to those who do not deserve it. What to take from a fool, why take offense at him, because he is a man deprived of reason, which means that he is already punished by God. You just need to draw the appropriate conclusions for yourself and understand that you should not have any serious business with this person, that he or she will never change, and you should not expect anything good from a traitor fool.

You see, dear readers, everyone makes mistakes. We are not perfect. But this is especially often done by stupid people, of whom, it must be said, there are many in our world. Therefore, the betrayal of these people is their next stupidity. But only a few deliberately betray. These are not stupid, but really mean people. It makes no sense to be offended by fools, as I said, because their stupidity harms not only the people around them, but also themselves. Well, as for those scoundrels who deliberately betray us, for the sake of their selfish and often base goals, what can I say about them, except that if we ran into them, then we were very unlucky. Here are some psychologists who recommend learning to forgive your betrayers, which certainly helps to survive betrayal, but is too simple a solution. Of course, hating a traitor also does not make sense, because with our hatred we poison our own soul, but as for forgiveness, before forgiving someone, you must first understand why and whom we are forgiving. Well, let's say, how can you forgive a fool who betrayed you out of stupidity, if such a person, in principle, should not be taken seriously? If it so happened that a fool betrayed you, then you should not forgive him, but yourself, for believing in a fool, for not seeing a fool in a fool, for allowing a fool to betray you, you smart person. Do you understand what the logic should be here? Forgiving fools is, you know, too big a favor for them, because first you need to see a piece of reason in them, believe in it, then be deceived, and only then forgive the one who turned out to be worse than you expected. And if you did not do all this, then you should not forgive the fool, you should simply completely ignore him and his treacherous act.

As for the scoundrels and bastards who deliberately and sometimes very cruelly betray people for the sake of their interests, then, in fact, they should be forgiven, not only for no reason, but also for no reason. You see, a bastard, he is a bastard, and always will be, because this is his role. How can you forgive him, why forgive him? To then again let him close to you and let him sting you again? A bastard betrays because he is a bastard, therefore he is a traitor, and he should not be forgiven, but, so to speak, marked as a black sheep, so that in the future you do not mess with him and in no case trust him in anything. That's all we need to do in order to calmly, without unnecessary, negative emotions that take away a lot of strength and nerves from us, survive betrayal, and having received a useful life lesson, continue to live on.

And only a few people who, indeed, out of inexperience, out of unreason, because of, so to speak, temporary insanity, without any malicious intent, due to circumstances for which they were not ready and which forced them to betray us, in principle deserve our forgiveness. In any case, I believe that such people can be forgiven. It happens that just a morally weak person, because of his weakness and cowardice, unwittingly, can betray you, friends. And then he will wildly repent of his act, he will regret what he did, and he would be happy to fix everything, but he cannot, to his and your regret. The past, as you know, cannot be changed. Therefore, he wants only one thing - that you forgive him. He does not expect a human attitude from you, which he did not deserve, he does not count on anything other than forgiveness, because he understands that he hurt you, that he did very, very badly, betraying you. He understands that now you will no longer see in him the one you saw before. And just think, he will carry this heavy moral burden all his life. He will really carry it in himself, friends, believe me. He, or she, will remember his act of betrayal throughout his life, and these memories will cause that person the same intense pain that you experience when you are betrayed. And I think that you and I should not burden the lives of such people, no matter how much they betrayed us, and torment their souls with our resentment towards them. Therefore, I suggest that you forgive them, forgive and let go if you no longer want to deal with such people.

You, my dear reader, as a reasonable person, I'm sure you understand perfectly well that it's better to turn to a psychologist for help to solve your problems than to flood them with alcohol, or try to intoxicate yourself in some other way to cope with your pain and suffering. There is no need to harm your health when there are normal ways to solve such problems. Problems need to be dealt with, not covered up. The main thing is to put things in order in your head, then there will be order in life. Betrayal is hard to bear, I understand that. But it can always be done, believe me.

male conversation

Volodymyr LITVIN: "Only those close to you betray - those who stand in the second row, and it is no coincidence that they say that if you look at someone's back for a long time, there will be a desire to stick a knife in it"

“WHAT IS STABLE WITH US IS THAT EVERYTHING IS BAD, AND HOW TO MAKE IT GOOD?”

- “The main threat to national security is the Ukrainian government itself,” you once said, and another quote from you: “Ukraine - richest country, but went to the wrong people in management, ”maybe, Vladimir Mikhailovich, our people are not like that?

So, do you need to change?

- No, but what's the reason?

We have no external threats as such - only internal ones, and when I talk about power, I mean deputies of all levels, the executive branch - absolutely everyone. Let's take, for example, Western Ukraine: all representatives of power are elected by the people, and this choice must be respected. Who to blame? Organize your life! I will say more, although they will criticize me for this: the heads of administrations work there, as if in a foreign territory, and, by and large, this reminds me of the 90s of the last century, when the regional committees, city committees and district committees of the CPSU were under a state of siege and practically no one went there - only furtively, through the back entrance, regular workers made their way, and in some places they stopped going out.

- This is true...

The same is true today: I am watching the Verkhovna Rada, and, you know, the person who worked as the head of parliament...

- ...so many years...

In the know, what is a compromise and the democratic foundations of the organization of power. After all, it is easier to press, to command, and the Verkhovna Rada is a place where the nation must coordinate controversial issues and develop a single line of behavior ...

- ... state ...

Yes, and it may not pass exactly in the middle, but it must be a compromise and not allow extremes to tear the country apart and lead to cataclysms.

What does our discussion of the most important issues often boil down to? Everyone talks about how bad things are around here: both pro-government factions and those that call themselves opposition, but what is bad in our country is known, in my opinion, to everyone, and what is stable here is that everyone bad, but how to make it good?

PHL Photos

Recently, the Verkhovna Rada considered the question of the responsibility of the government - I barely shouted it out, interrogated the words! By the way, it’s somehow inconvenient when you have the right to speak as the head of the committee, and they say to you: “You have one minute” - I wanted the deputies to hear me and understand: the very consideration of the issue of government responsibility is for the UK-ra- and we are an event, we must give an account of what state the country is in and what the Cabinet of Ministers should be responsible for. This did not happen. Cause? It is worth quoting Boris Chichibabin: “Intelligence has not grown up to freedom” - so we, parliamentarians, in order to oblige the government to account for its actions before parliament and the people, probably have not grown up with reason.

A peculiar duel took place: Arseniy Yatsenyuk left the opposition, who spoke pathetically about how bad everything was, although he could also bear responsibility for this, since in fact immediately after kindergarten ...

- ... held leadership positions ...

Yes, but from the authorities - the prime minister was delegated, who, instead of telling how problems are solved and in what incredibly difficult conditions Ukraine works, most of the time, being provoked by Arseniy Petrovich, he blamed his predecessors, but we must move forward! Looking at this confrontation, I remembered the words of Andrei Dementiev: “Some go for years to difficult glory. Others just have to go over the notebook.” What happened in the end?

- Never mind...

100 people just voted - no decision was made, but why was all this: to start a process, to play along with the authorities? Yes, it’s just that after that, you can’t touch the government for half a year, and seeing such an attitude and hearing the demands: “You must turn yourself in!” Ministers will generally stop visiting the Verkhovna Rada. What will it ultimately give? Absolutely nothing, so many politicians must finally step on their own song and understand that the parliament should speak with the voice of the whole people.

“PEOPLE DO NOT CHOOSE, BUT VOTE, AND THIS IS A BIG PROBLEM”

Vladimir Mikhailovich, have you ever answered your own question: why do Ukrainians always make mistakes when they vote?

- ... they sold scarce sausage, coffee, Indian tea ...

Music was playing, and in the countryside where I grew up, it was also a celebration of communication: there, collective farmers, bending over in the beds, stand, do not see each other, and here is an occasion to straighten up, say hello and look into each other's eyes. Everyone understood that the result would be...

- ...how to...

As planned, that's why they just went and dropped the ballot into the ballot box - many people still follow the same principle: they want to believe the authorities, they hope that they will finally tell the truth. Especially when politicians promise something, inspire. For example, when they promise a salary of a thousand euros and a pension of 500, but they don’t talk about serious things - that they need to work for this, however, when this beautiful thesis was written,

As far as I understand, political technologists who are far from Ukrainian realities did not take into account that for many Ukrainians a thousand euros is the same as a thousand hryvnias: they don’t know what the euro is! I sometimes hear: “Here they promise me a thousand rubles, so I get so much without promises ...” - this indicates how divorced politicians are from what the people live: yes, people in the eyes of your euros did not see what you give them going?

Recently, the mayor of Sumy, Gennady Mi-na-ev, advised everyone under the age of 35 to leave Ukraine, they say, there are no prospects here - do you share his point of view?

I think he was just stating a fact.

- And in my opinion, this is the cry of the soul!

The fact is that I am now making up for lost time - I try to communicate more with my children. They are already adults, independent and tell me that everyone who is able to move, by hook or by crook, is trying to move outside Ukraine. Trust is lost - we, senior politicians, have killed faith in justice! You understand: when my colleagues rumble about law and legality, but they themselves live with the help of roundabout maneuvers, people stop believing them. If they felt this, they would have complete mutual understanding with the people.

But it's a tragedy, right?

Huge! (Pause).

You know, one thinks very well at divine services. I know my sins better than anyone and I punish myself more than all my “well-wishers” put together, and so, when you stand in church, you think all the time and watch people. Today there are many young people in churches, they come with children. There are fewer elderly, and what I call the word “smell” is in the air - how should I characterize it? I realized that this is the smell of impoverishment (not even poverty - impoverishment and disappointment), it gray color, and at the same time comes from those who can be classified as the middle class: they have an education, they arrived in cars (we used to consider a car a sign of prosperity), but the world is shrinking today, our economy too, we are dependent on exports of a country that is sagging, and citizens feel it.

- Does the political elite of Uk-ra-i-na understand what you are talking about now or not?

Well, I will say again that I don’t use such a term as “political elite” - we have a ruling class that inherited the worst qualities from the old Soviet nomenklatura and added to them the ability to take what gives power.

- The ruling class does not understand everything you said?

I think not, and you know, recently I was in the office of one of the leaders on business ... They report to him the situation related to the spring processes in the agricultural sector: they say, everything is fine, there are no problems, but I visit the district every week , I see that everything is not at all like that, and I understand: when the regional head reports to a superior, he doesn’t want to spoil ...

- ... your reputation ...

And the mood of the leadership, so the situation will be brushed a little, smoothed out. When his data for the head of the industry in the capital is already being processed, those who do this are also aware: well, why spoil the mood of the boss? - this will affect us, and when the boss is going to report even higher, he thinks: “Why should I demonstrate bad work? For this, after all, to put it mildly, they will knock on the head, ”and until the information reaches the very top, it will be distorted 10 times.

In the course of considering the issue of government responsibility, I asked the prime minister: “How is it that, being in my district, I constantly drive on roads that are supposedly not yet repaired in two percent?” Well, we don’t have those more than 90 percent allegedly not yet repaired, so let’s admit to people: we don’t have the opportunity, but we will do this and that, and for this we need this! - they will understand, they are so patient that they can be convinced of everything ...

- ... as long as they don't lie ...

And they looked into the eyes, but the picture of what is happening in the country is distorted, and, believe me, being the speaker of the Verkhovna Rada, I also felt it. They will bring you all the reports, you will read them, then you hold parliamentary hearings, you give an opening speech and you often see that the participants do not perceive it - moreover, they refute it with arguments in their speeches.

"I'm irascible, and for this I scold myself all the time - the release of emotions is, as a rule, a sign of weakness"

- Is it hard to be the Chairman of the Verkhovna Rada?

-(Sighs). A person who is real - I emphasize this word! - I would not like to occupy a higher position, I have not yet met, and although everyone groans and complains about how difficult it is for them, they act according to the principle of counter workers in Soviet times: it’s hard, but we can bear it. Of course, it’s difficult, nerves of steel and angelic patience are needed when they spit in your face, and you have to 200, or even 300 times a day (smiles) repeat the words “please” and “thank you”, but what can you do, since such is fate?

In our torn and quarreled society, the head of parliament must demonstrate impartiality, is obliged to listen to everyone, trying to rationally find the grain, and most importantly - not to squeeze. It is necessary to press, to pinch - no.

Often, looking at how you conduct meetings of the Verkhovna Rada, I noticed that you were pretty nervous - was it impossible to avoid this?

I am hot-tempered (smiles) and for this I scold myself all the time - the release of emotions is, as a rule, a sign of weakness.

- Whom in the Verkhovna Rada did you sincerely respect, and whom did you openly despise?

I tried to treat everyone equally. Those whom I despised responded to me, I think, with fierce reciprocity, but I never showed my contempt, besides, everything is changeable in parliament: yesterday they could throw mud at you, and today they kiss you wherever you can. Now I walk around the session hall - and everyone greets me, communicates: there are no special likes and dislikes there.

When I was just starting my deputy career, an unpleasant event happened, and I could not get off this negative wave, and an experienced parliamentarian said: “Hold on - tomorrow no one will talk about this topic. News in the Verkhovna Rada, even the most topical, topical, high-profile, live for a maximum of a week - today you read nasty things about yourself and lose consciousness (especially if the journalists have misrepresented everything), and the next day everyone will forget about it - just another scar will remain in your heart ... ".

- Have you always been able to tell your colleagues in parliament everything you think about them?

No - if in any society people only told the truth to each other, this society would be in a state of permanent war. The truth is relative, after all: there are absolute truths - in God's commandments, for example, but human truth is dynamic, mobile, and just as there is no objective history, there is no objective truth either. You may lack arguments, you may look at the problem and not see all its aspects... - in a word, I am categorically against offending people.

The history of independent Ukraine knows four Presidents, and with whom of them do you have the best relations?

Well, of course, with Leonid Danilovich - I worked under him for a long time, I know what he wanted to do for the country, and I'm sure he would have done it. It seems to me that in 50 years all presidents will be appreciated, although we have a terrible Ukrainian tradition- to spit at once, and, as a rule, the nearest people do it. A stranger will not betray: he was a stranger and will remain - only those close to him betray, those who stand in the second row. They say that if you look at someone's back for a long time, there is a desire to stick a knife in it, and this is done in different ways.

- Which of the Ukrainian presidents is the most effective, in your opinion?

- (shrugs). I think that everyone deserves the assessment that they deserve, but now I don’t presume to judge, because the big is seen from a distance.

“DMITRY TABACCHNIK BUILT THE PRESIDENTIAL ADMINISTRATION, IN ACTUALLY CREATED A MONSTER”

- Another complex issue: who was the best head of the Administration of the President of Ukraine?

-(Pause). Well, I must tell you that Dmitry Tabachnik built the Administration, in fact he created a monster - then the head of government was not even the deputy head of the state, but the deputy head of the administration.

Joke: “Who is Leonid Kuchma? This is the President in the Administration of Dmitry Tabachnik” - corresponded to reality?

This is an example of how we can evaluate any process in a hypertrophied form, because key decisions were then made in one office. I think that this line, aimed at building a rigid structure that influenced all areas, was in the Administration and during my leadership, and I will tell you why: pure politics did not interest me. It seems to me that Medvedchuk also showed himself to be a tough manager, who took responsibility even in very risky cases and brought all matters to their logical conclusion - in those years there was discipline in the Administration ...

- Today?

Well, then the deputies of the head did not climb into the stands and did not go to meetings - they knew: if the head goes, the deputy has nothing to do there. They worked, and today I absolutely don’t follow how the Administration functions: I’m sorry, it’s not interesting, for me it’s a passed life and career stage.

- Do you remember the odious Pavel Lazarenko? Did you have a chance to communicate with him?

Seen twice. One late evening: I was still the first assistant to the President and worked until late. Leonid Danilovich entered, together with Pavel Ivanovich, and the President said about him: “A very valuable shot” (smiles). Then, when Kuchma was on a business trip, the phone rang on the “weave” machine (“two hundred” was not there then), and the voice on the receiver said: “This is Pavel Lazarenko - maybe we could have lunch, talk with you?”.

I politely refused, and we didn’t meet again, although there were moments that were unpleasant for me when Leonid Danilovich spoke with the Messages in the Verkhovna Rada (his reports were then very seriously prepared, huge teams worked on them, and they were more economic than political ).

In front, I remember, in the government box, Prime Minister Lazarenko was sitting, and in the second row, behind him, I was: I checked the text of the speech with what the President says, since any omissions and additions had to be taken into account, the final version of the text should be verbatim.

So, when Leonid Kuchma once again criticized the Cabinet of Ministers on a grand scale, Pavel Ivanovich turned around and looked at me like this (blinks often) and after each such moment, I pressed myself more and more into the chair and even slid off it (laughs). Lazarenko and I never saw each other again...

- Did he give the impression of a strong man?

Undoubtedly!

- An outstanding personality?

People who knew him better noted his unusual will.

“THE OPPOSITION LEADERS, I THINK, ARE PRAYING THAT TYMOSHENKO WILL NOT BE LEAVED BEFORE 15, AT LEAST. THEY UNDERSTAND: YULIA VLADIMIROVNA WILL BUILD THEM ALL, AND THEY WILL STAND IN THE PLACES SHE DETERMINES FOR THEM"

- Is Yulia Tymoshenko a bright figure?

Undoubtedly. She is charismatic, and this is her brightness.

Do you often remember her today?

The fact is that now her comrades-in-arms do not remember her - Lutsenko's amnesty made life difficult for them, they realized that they would have to make room one way or another, and journalists asked me about Tymoshenko not so long ago, and I said: “Who understands the meaning of the expression: “Do not renounce money and prison”, he would not wish the enemy to be behind bars.

- Do you think Yulia Vladimirovna's comrades-in-arms want her to be released as soon as possible?

It depends on whom to consider as comrades-in-arms ... I won’t say about everyone, but, of course, relatives and friends, first of all, like no one else, live in this hope, and the closest fellow party members too - the rest, it seems to me, are praying to God that this does not happen. Knowing the character, charisma and mood of Tymoshenko, they understand: Yulia Vladimirovna will smash all the leaders of the opposition ...

- ... on a pebble ...

She will build, and they will stand in the places that she will determine for them. Therefore, of course, they do not want this to happen - at least until the 15th year.

- If she is amnestied, will you be happy?

I do not think that in this case it is possible to use this definition. It seems to me that we will feel relief - in the sense that the European Union will be smaller ...

- ... to call us to order ...

Yes, because if they have already taken these rails, they will not leave them. There, the principle that some news overlaps others does not apply, since voters in European countries may have the opinion that their leaders leadership qualities do not demonstrate, but show softness and do not defend democracy.

- Was your relationship with Alexander Moroz difficult?

I have never had any relationship with him and never will.

- Why?

I don’t see any reason to talk about why there wasn’t: there can’t be any of them, especially since we worked in parallel, without intersecting. In the Verkhovna Rada of Ukraine, when he headed the faction of socialists, there were exclusively working moments. By the way, I always congratulated him on his birthday - by phone, and if I had the opportunity, then personally. I am above all resentment, especially since during our short communication, Frost complained to me all the time: “We were lied to, framed ...” (smiles).

- "Svoboda" - a project of the Party of Regions?

I think this is a project of a society that is becoming more radical. It is not my business to say who and what relation to them, but the fact that the Svobodovites have clearly grasped the attitude of people to power and are growing by leaps and bounds is a fact. If by nature a person is weak, he wants someone nearby to demonstrate strength - this is, firstly, and secondly, he wants to be confident in someone and therefore is looking for a leader, reinforced concrete and direct, like a string. Thirdly, we have no practice and experience of compromise, and hence another circumstance: the Stalinist class principle, expressed as far back as the late 1920s, that the class struggle intensifies as Soviet power is established is too tenacious. When the attempt to kindle the class struggle in the West failed, all efforts fell upon the USSR itself, especially since there was resistance - especially from the peasantry ...

Analyzing our political life, I can deduce a formula: as Ukraine establishes itself as an independent state, we have political confrontation and even hatred grows, which turns into open enmity according to the principle “who is not with us, is against us”. People really want the politician who proposes a compromise to nail down to some shore, to join a group of comrades, they don’t like loners. We have either black or white, without halftones - either we love it or we hate it, not wanting to delve into the essence of the problem. "Svoboda" takes this into account, and in the elections of 2015 there will be an attempt once again to divide the country - so that the people do not vote "for", but "against", because in many cases people vote "against", and therefore, as the living classic, "maєmo those that are maєmo" (smiles).

The Svoboda supporters are determined to expand the ranks of their supporters, and when political technologists try to make predictions and predict a couple of leaders in the upcoming presidential elections, I say: don’t do this, don’t take risks at all, because left and right radicalism will grow. According to the slogans, by the way, they actually ...

- ...match up...

And it is a well-known truth that a step to the right is taken from the left foot.

“NOT ONLY THEY WANTED TO THROW EGGS INTO ME, BUT THEY PLANNED TO PURCHASE PAINT ON ME AND BARRICADE IN THE OFFICE…”

I think you are familiar with Vladimir Zhirinovsky - a bright and, of course, talented person, but here in Ukraine we have a pale copy of him - deputy Lyashko: whose is he?

I am not familiar with Zhirinovsky, although, watching him, one conclusion should be made, which Ukrainians for some reason miss: he is smart, and when he talks about a problem - pathetically, hysterically - he speaks with knowledge of the matter. He has a lot of facts, and he is convincing, although he uses the technique of "crushing the enemy": by the way, I recently watched him on the example of a TV duel Zhirinovsky - Anpilov with Russian TV presenter Solovyov. Vladimir Volfovich starts broadcasting - and he already has four thousand sympathizers (laughs)...

- ... but Anpilov did not even give a word!

As for Lyashko, I think he is a lone politician - outrageous, but in terms of polemics he is growing. Many do not take him seriously, but this man understood the issues of politics and political science in just a few months, literally starting from scratch! Without powerful funding, getting more than one percent for your Radical Party is a serious achievement: remember how many millions were poured into the Royal ...

- ... and mediocrely ...

- Did you understand that?

Not only understood - voiced! Recruiting the iconic figures of yesterday is a direct way to ensure that society does not support you: I myself went through this, and for me it was a lesson.

I think that Ukrainian politics is getting dirtier and dirtier, but what, I wonder, did you feel when in 2010, right during a parliament session, they started throwing eggs at you?

I must tell you that this is not the whole scenario that we planned to implement, and, with your permission, I will start from the very beginning. Why was I convinced that we had no other way, except for the decision to ratify the Kharkiv agreements of 2010 on the presence of the Black Sea Fleet in Ukraine? April 20 is already in the yard, but there is still no budget, and it is impossible to make it up at the previous gas price: the economy is crumbling. Needed a breather in the form of a price reduction of $100...

- ...compromise...

Yes, and one more thing: the lack of a budget would lead to the fact that by May 9, participants in the Great Patriotic War, and there are three and a half million of them in Ukraine, would not be able to receive appropriate payments, and explain to them that, they say, , the budget has not been adopted - it's like the people to whom we all owe our lives do not care: this is a detail, but very eloquent.

The National Security and Defense Council met several times, various options were discussed, and the Russian side, led by Medvedev, not only proposed to extend the stay of the Russian Black Sea Fleet on the territory of Ukraine for 25 years, there were other options. In addition, you understand that President Yanukovych, actually starting his term, as far as it became clear to me from those meetings, was directly “burning with the desire” to make such decisions, but what to do - to ascertain the economic collapse of the country, pointing a finger at the previous leadership? You couldn't wait a minute!

Now I am trying to prove to critics that according to the agreement that was signed in the early 90s, the Russian fleet is on the territory of Ukraine until 2017. This is reality? Yes. Until that time, someone will be able to move him from his place, declare war on Russia and immediately surrender to captivity? When in the 1990s the leadership of Ukraine signed an agreement on dividing the Black Sea Fleet and basing it on native Ukrainian territory, it understood that there was no other way out either - we don’t criticize those people for the decision they made, right? Well, until the 17th year, it means, apparently, they hoped that someone wiser would come and have more opportunities for dialogue with Russia ...

We were talking about the fact that this is only the first step: further others will be taken - in order to regulate and intensify cooperation with Russian Federation in all directions of our life together: we are closely connected. I took all the arguments into account, and if I am convinced that this or that decision needs to be passed, even if the chandelier in the Verkhovna Rada falls, I will pass it anyway. The opposition planned to douse me with paint...

- ...even so?

Yes, at the hairdresser's, but I became aware of this, and I didn't go there (smiles). Then they wanted to barricade themselves in the office, and I did not appear there either: I met with the ambassador of one of the countries and immediately after that went to the session hall to conduct the meeting. How did you feel when the eggs began to be thrown? Well, it was not very pleasant, but, firstly, spare clothes were prepared for me, and secondly, towels and umbrellas were prepared. Towels - to sweep it all off the table, umbrellas - to cover up, and the meeting procedure was fully maintained! Oleg Bilorus, head of the Committee on Foreign Affairs, who represented the opposition, reported that the committee made a negative decision, but first they always vote for a positive one, and if it does not pass, the decision adopted by the committee comes into force.

“PART OF THE DEPUTIES CARRIED WEAPONS TO THE PARLIAMENT WITH THEM - SOME EVEN WALKED IN BULLET-VESTS”

- In the Verkhovna Rada, deputies often fight - tell me, will they ever start shooting?

Oh, you know, when my first term in parliament was, some of my colleagues (I don’t know how it is now) carried weapons with them, because there are frequent provocations ...

- Right in the hall with him appeared?

Of course - having permission to store and carry. Some even wore bulletproof vests!

- To Parliament?

Yes - well, this, as people say, some people have periods of exacerbation ... At the entrance, there were even booths installed, where weapons should be stored for the duration of the meeting, and then taken away, however, this idea was not implemented: no one searched the deputy has rights. It’s just that one day one of the people’s deputies, who was walking around the hall, fell out of his gun, and I decided that it was necessary to let them inside without a weapon ...

- Who is this deputy, can you tell me?

History is silent on this. (laughs).

There was a precedent in the Armenian parliament when, in 1999, the presidium headed by Prime Minister Sargsyan and the speaker of the National Assembly Demirchyan (who, by the way, was still under Brezh-ne- ve the first secretary of the Central Committee of the Communist Party of Ar-me-nii) ...

Yes, and this cannot be ignored, therefore, when the plenary session is held, the Verkhovna Rada is surrounded by security. You understand: for someone who has risen a little higher in our political garden, the attributes of power are important - the guards must follow him at least two cars equipped with means of suppressing communications, drive, and it’s so interesting today when you are already driving without a cortege, rules traffic without violating, but overtaking from right to left, shouting: “Take to the right! Stop!” - Colleagues, people's deputies are going ...

- And you take to the right?

So what to do? (Laughs). I think that in this area, too, it is necessary to put things in order, and all private security guards from "Titan" and so on should prohibit any access to the Verkhovna Rada of Ukraine and the premises where plenary sessions are held - even if they have certificates of assistants to a people's deputy, and they they are really there.

- Do you have many enemies today?

Yes, I have no enemies! (Smiling).

- Well, in the years spent in politics, have you ever been threatened - openly?

No, thank God it wasn't. Well, the chosen one of the people could come up and say something, but these things are, in general, ordinary ... I know that at one time there were certain calls, some measures were taken against me, but there are reasons to heroize myself and in detail about I don't see it today. To be honest, they are afraid of me as a competitor, although I don’t pretend to be absolutely anything - I just belong to those few people who have brains ...

- ... and good ...

Smart people, without too much modesty, but they don’t perceive such people: you have to be below the average level, and then they will consider you their boyfriend.

“IN ANY COUNTRY UNDER ANY REGIME THEY WERE LISTENING, LISTENING AND WILL BE LISTENING - YOU NEED TO KNOW SIMPLY WHAT, WHERE AND WITH WHOM TO TALK TO”

Security constant interference in personal life implies - you do not belong to yourself, strangers literally know everything about you: does it bother you?

You get used to it. At first, it’s unusual, of course, when they breathe into your ear all the time, and then you can’t do without it. Many people experience the end of certain powers, when they lose their guard, very painfully, and some calmly refused it, they say that they didn’t feel this addictive effect and are quite happy, but in general, a person gets used to everything, besides the inconvenience, security and creates a certain comfort: a bodyguard is like a nanny, later he becomes a close person. For example, even if I come to my parents, at the table, until the guards and drivers are fed, I won’t sit down, and wherever I am, I ask first of all that my people don’t go hungry (they will say later: “We are a day and we keep watch at night, but they forgot about us ...”). I delve into their problems: family, apartment, just everyday - I try to support everything and, of course, I count on reciprocity, that they won’t hit me in the back, although they have access to an apartment and a dacha. On the other hand, all my privileges have actually ended, and in the autumn the protection will be removed from me.

- And what, without her stay?

Yes (smiles)- what's so terrible about that?

- Today your phones are tapped, you are being watched - what do you think?

And that doesn't bother me at all. The late Gennady Udovenko - a wise man, experienced - he said this: “In any country, under any regime (and in our country, not least), they listened, they listen and they will listen - you just need to know what, where and with whom to talk.” True, he uttered another phrase that I remember all the time - when he was asked: “Would you like to return to the post of Minister of Foreign Affairs?”, Udovenko replied: “For two hours - to sign a number of dismissal orders” So, when they ask me a question: “Would you like to become the speaker of parliament again?”, I joke: “For half an hour - in order to put a signature under several decrees.”

- Mobile phone you have?

- At all?

Well, when I go somewhere by myself or with my family, I write a statement that from such and such a date I refuse state protection and turn on my mobile, but I don’t know how to use it, especially outside the country, so I’ll suffer - and turn it off again . The first days I go to the Internet through Wi-Fi, but when I understand that I can’t sleep peacefully because of this, I stop using it and feel normal again.

Phones annoy me - before, when the government called home, it started to shake, and if one of my family members was nearby, I asked them to pick up the phone instead of me. The discussion continued until the phone stopped ringing. (smiles) and then it all started all over again ... In general, if something extraordinary, God forbid, happens, the security officer on duty will inform me about it.

“I DID NOT EVEN OPEN THE PACKAGE IN WHICH THE BRIBE WAS IN: SUDDENLY THERE IS AN EXPLOSIVE DEVICE IN THERE?”

Have you ever been offered bribes?

Once, at the very beginning of my leadership of the Administration of the President of Ukraine, two people came to visit me...

- ... respected?

Yes, later they occupied various high posts (now, however, not the best times have come for them), and when they left, I saw that some kind of package was left on the table near the papers. They were caught up, asked to return, and he was given away - by the way, if I'm not mistaken, this was written in an article by one of the most talented, in my opinion, journalists of that time, Yulia Mostova.

- What was in the package?

And I didn’t even open it: what if there is an explosive device? (Laughs).

- Your parents still live in the village...

God bless...

- ...and you somehow improved their life so that they would not feel like ordinary villagers?

I tried to take them to me more than once, but in the city they cannot stand even for several days - I go to them in the morning, and my father and mother are already gathered and ask: “Take us to the village ...”. They live where they are used to, but I didn’t equip them with any “civilization” - I just wanted to change the windows, because the frames are such that you can pierce your finger (they built a hut in 73 - from what they had enough money, but I no longer lived in it, since I went to Kiev) ...

If they did something, then for the whole village: they installed gas, plumbing, repaired roads, put up fences, installed telephones, built a church, a gymnasium, a feldsher-obstetric station with a day hospital, a post office that didn’t exist before, and, of course, Parents use all these benefits - now, at least, I have the opportunity to call them at least once a week and ask how they are doing.

Are they proud of you?

As a father, I believe that parents are always proud of their children - even if they are unlucky and something doesn’t work out for them, dad and mom will be on the side of their children and find how to justify them. I, my brothers and sister since childhood know what parental love but strict. Children cannot be shown that you love them very much, and all these smack-smacks do not yet mean that the parents adore the child - this may be some kind of ritual. In any case, I know that my parents are worried about me, and this is the main thing.

We have already talked with you about that provocation connected with the death of Gongadze: imagine what it was like for my mother (my father is more reserved, keeps everything in himself, and she is like me) ... Or when mishandled Cossack women from Kiev, Ternopil, Vinnitsa, Ivano-Frankivsk and Lvov on my small homeland landings were carried out, mother's photographs were pasted everywhere with inscriptions that her son betrayed his mother's tongue, and tomorrow he will betray his mother ... After that she had a stroke - tell me, where is the border of humanity in politics? By the way, I know who did it...

Of course, parents live only with us, children, and why am I afraid of calls, especially early ones? Mother 84, father 83 ... In our family, I note, there is a holy unwritten rule: on the birthday of mom and dad, wherever we are, we go to them.

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Betrayal is one of the most insidious acts among people. A person who has been betrayed experiences an incredible heartache. Especially if he was betrayed by relatives about betrayal, they will help you express your feelings and your feeling. Then this pain can be endured at least a little easier.

Aphorisms about treason and betrayal

• There are no minor betrayals.
• Traitors are one of the strictest judges.
• If someone acts like a pig, he says: "I'm sorry, but I'm only a man." But if someone treats such a person like a pig, he is immediately indignant: "How is it possible? I am also a man!"
• As far as it is easy for a person to betray a loved one, it is so difficult to forgive his betrayal.

Here are a few more statuses and aphorisms about betrayal:

• You get most of the trips from the "dwarfs", because this is their low level.
• He has the properties of a dog, everything except fidelity.
• Only those whom you consider close people betray.
• A sincere soul can never become treacherous.
• Selling very low for a low price...
• Thanks to all those who left me in trouble. It made me so strong that it's better for us not to cross at all anymore.

Statuses and quotes about treason

When a person is treacherously changed, he experiences incredible mental anguish. This state is described in aphorisms about the betrayal of a loved one:

• If you live with a person together, but you think that nothing connects you with him, this is already treason.
• Betrayal is a weakness of character.
• Every backstab inflicted has someone's face on it.
• If you keep your partner on a leash, then do not dare to expect devotion from him.
• The hardest thing is to forgive your own infidelity.
• You can forgive the betrayal of the body, but if the soul has changed, it is impossible to forgive. You just need to let this person go.
• How many days and nights does it take to forget betrayal? After all, it is impossible to forgive her, no matter how much time passes.
• Treason and betrayal are universal, they hurt everyone around, even the offender himself.
• You can't forgive betrayal. A person who cheats is looking for someone better than you, which means that he will never appreciate you.
• Do not lose your head in love, otherwise you will not notice that you are being used.

Quotes and aphorisms about the betrayal of friends

• He who dares to betray his friends will never be able to find peace.
• It is impossible to be friends with traitors again, even if it is vital.

Don't leave your friends, you can't replace them

Do not change your loved ones - you will not return.

After all, in time you will notice

You betray yourself by betraying yourself!

• No matter what I was promised and guaranteed, I still will not betray my friends.
• In my friends, I always want to see a dog. After all, she never betrays.

These are not all aphorisms about betrayal:

• There are several types among the friends of scoundrels. Those scoundrels who are ashamed of their actions. Those who naively believe that they are doing meanness for good. And there are ordinary scoundrels, purebreds, so to speak, they don't care.
• Selling out friends does not mean being bankrupt, but it means building a career.
• The main thing is to see in time which of your friends will betray you next.
• A friend's smile can be misleading. First you need to make sure that she is sincere.
• It is difficult to predict whether the hand that shakes your hand is capable of suddenly stabbing you in the back.

Original statuses about traitors

• I like treason, but not traitors.
• Traitors betray themselves first.
• Often a person's betrayal indicates a lack of his dexterity.
• Unfortunately honest good people always lower their eyes when they see meanness and arrogance.
• I ask the Lord to keep me from those whom I trust. After all, those whom I do not believe, I will beware of myself.

A man will find the circumstance

And the right logical thread,

To manage a petty betrayal,

Explain in beautiful words.

Here are a few more aphorisms about betrayal:

• The worst thing that can happen is when you were not even sold, but simply given away for free.
• Even those who are pleased with the traitors, over time they begin to despise.
• Do not look for obvious scoundrels. After all, they are ordinary people, they just often commit meanness.
• If someone betrayed you, it means that he is simply betrayed by someone else.
• It is a pity that most often those whom we protect with our chests are stabbed in the back.
• If you're a traitor, don't flatter yourself that this is original.
• The more a person knows about you, the stronger their temptation to betray you.
• Nothing lifts the spirit like the defeat of a scoundrel.
• The main thing in life is not to betray yourself.